I need help.
01-13-2021, 05:53 PM
My previous thread in this forum went largely unread, as far as I can tell. I did get contacted by a few supportive souls, though. One of them asked if they should call attention to the thread, but I was too anxious to agree to that.
Since you may not be interested in that thread before this one, I will make a very quick summary.
I have strong disagreements with the mod team, and their past behavior has made me feel uncomfortable being in a space where they have authority. Last year, I made an effort to discuss these disagreements with Mirdini. It did not work out and I felt even worse.
So, I have sadly concluded my only option is to leave. But there is unfinished business which has caused me to drag my feet on actually making my exit, and I have been struggling for far too long to attempt to deal with it. I have concluded it is more than I can handle on my own, so this is a request for help.
The first and most important thing is that I want to reconnect with my friends.
Due to emotional distress, I retreated from every part of this community, but in the end, my problems are with moderation, not with the community as a whole. There are people I've missed, and I've withdrawn from them. Nothing makes me feel worse about this period of absence and silence than how little I did to let people know I wasn't okay.
So, this is an open offer. If you consider me a friend, feel free to contact me somehow and we'll work something out about staying in touch. I plan to set up a Discord server just for convenience, but I'm okay with people not joining that and just talking to me through DMs if they'd prefer.
I wish I had the emotional strength to make the first move in contacting individual people, but unfortunately I don't.
The second thing is that I want to write up my complaints and post them here, so everyone can know why I left.
Unfortunately, going over the key events causes me a lot of anxiety. As a result, so far I've only managed to write anything at all about it by being much vaguer than I would like to be.
I feel it has taken me far too long to do this, and I cannot get over the hurdles on my own. I am looking for any sort of help that people can provide here, even if it's just lending a sympathetic ear and occasionally prodding me so I don't stall on it for even longer than I already have.
Third, whatever else I do, I intend to continue Swamped. I have been posting it on this forum purely out of inertia.
I want to set up my own webspace so I can continue it there, but transferring it over is a lot of work and I would appreciate help with getting it done. Not to mention there are people here who have better design sense than I do and might be able to make the site look nice.
I may transfer other works over, but this is the main priority.
Thank you to anyone who responds.
Since you may not be interested in that thread before this one, I will make a very quick summary.
I have strong disagreements with the mod team, and their past behavior has made me feel uncomfortable being in a space where they have authority. Last year, I made an effort to discuss these disagreements with Mirdini. It did not work out and I felt even worse.
So, I have sadly concluded my only option is to leave. But there is unfinished business which has caused me to drag my feet on actually making my exit, and I have been struggling for far too long to attempt to deal with it. I have concluded it is more than I can handle on my own, so this is a request for help.
The first and most important thing is that I want to reconnect with my friends.
Due to emotional distress, I retreated from every part of this community, but in the end, my problems are with moderation, not with the community as a whole. There are people I've missed, and I've withdrawn from them. Nothing makes me feel worse about this period of absence and silence than how little I did to let people know I wasn't okay.
So, this is an open offer. If you consider me a friend, feel free to contact me somehow and we'll work something out about staying in touch. I plan to set up a Discord server just for convenience, but I'm okay with people not joining that and just talking to me through DMs if they'd prefer.
I wish I had the emotional strength to make the first move in contacting individual people, but unfortunately I don't.
The second thing is that I want to write up my complaints and post them here, so everyone can know why I left.
Unfortunately, going over the key events causes me a lot of anxiety. As a result, so far I've only managed to write anything at all about it by being much vaguer than I would like to be.
I feel it has taken me far too long to do this, and I cannot get over the hurdles on my own. I am looking for any sort of help that people can provide here, even if it's just lending a sympathetic ear and occasionally prodding me so I don't stall on it for even longer than I already have.
Third, whatever else I do, I intend to continue Swamped. I have been posting it on this forum purely out of inertia.
I want to set up my own webspace so I can continue it there, but transferring it over is a lot of work and I would appreciate help with getting it done. Not to mention there are people here who have better design sense than I do and might be able to make the site look nice.
I may transfer other works over, but this is the main priority.
Thank you to anyone who responds.
There's no reason for this | Or this | Death is inevitable | You can't challenge fate | The smallest change | I'm overwhelmed
I'm serious | It makes perfect sense | Easy as ABC! | I can't even explain it | Cleaning up someone else's mess
I suck | I rule | I've got it made | Really, I'm serious | This bugs me | It's all lies | I want to believe | Beauty is a curse
I'm serious | It makes perfect sense | Easy as ABC! | I can't even explain it | Cleaning up someone else's mess
I suck | I rule | I've got it made | Really, I'm serious | This bugs me | It's all lies | I want to believe | Beauty is a curse