Critique and Advice; the treadmill of adventuring.

Critique and Advice; the treadmill of adventuring.
RE: Critique and Advice; the treadmill of adventuring.
I'm kinda new to this whole "actually serious adventure" thing, and I already need some help (or at least some feedback) on Perception. Is the prose too purple? Am I giving enough room for suggestions? How can I give more? How do I deal with having too much backstory and too little plot?
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RE: Critique and Advice; the treadmill of adventuring.
You're doing just fine, as far as I can tell. The prose is easy enough to understand, and making an early habit of giving explicit prompts is good for suggestions. I would do the same, but I'm already several chapters into my adventure, and I value consistency in writing more than I do suggestions.

Don't be afraid to go all Tarantino on our asses and use flashbacks and non-chronological storytelling; maybe your backstory IS your plot.
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RE: Critique and Advice; the treadmill of adventuring.
Re: Perception: It seems good so far, I don't think the prose is too purple at all. The figurative language is descriptive and purposeful and doesn't seem to drag the narrative down or get in the way.
I also agree that if the backstory is more important or interesting you could consider going fully non-linear with the narrative if you think it would be a good way to explore those past events.

So, I feel like I've put up enough stuff on Eagle Time that I feel okay with asking for some feedback on Reforge (specifically the current stuff on ET more than the super old and pre-ET bits). This is the first big creative thing I've ever done, and I don't have any clue what I'm doing!
Any tips on how to write unique character voice? Also, how do you do tone? Because I feel like my adventure always ends up all over the place in that regard.

I guess I don't know much specific advice to ask for, it would just be nice to kind of get a feel for what's working here and what isn't, especially given that it's getting close to the end of the current chapter I think and a chapter break seems like a good time to modify formatting/writing/art if I have to.
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RE: Critique and Advice; the treadmill of adventuring.
I feel like I do a somewhat bad job at presenting interesting options for CHIRAL suggestions. People who do make suggestions have really great ones, it's just that it's tapering off in frequency, and I think it's out of lack for obvious routes on what to do.

Any thoughts? I might change some things up somehow to help with this, but I dunno if I'm off the mark here.
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RE: Critique and Advice; the treadmill of adventuring.
I know this is an old thread, but I have kind of a question about adventure writing. Is there a such thing as taking your adventure too seriously? Back on the MSPA forums, I felt like I might have made the tone of my adventures too straightforward and boring, and didn't have enough of a sense of humor about things my characters said/did or funny suggestions the readers made, and the readership of my adventures always dropped off after the first few updates. Do you guys have any tips on balancing a "serious" tone without making it too boring?
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RE: Critique and Advice; the treadmill of adventuring.
I write a pretty serious tone adventure, but I balance it out with a cute art style and occasional comic relief. Don't be afraid to make jokes or take joke suggestions, but use your best judgement to determine whether or not it would be appropriate. Maybe the previous scene was really emotionally draining, so a joke or two would help lighten the mood. It probably wouldn't be appropriate in the middle of that scene, though.

But, in my experience, seriousness is not much of a determining factor for readership. If you have a small number of people suggesting on your story, chances are your readers are just having a hard time coming up with suggestions, which is a different animal altogether. The key to avoiding that is to have something interesting happen every update - if nothing has changed, or there is nothing to respond to, you probably won't get new suggestions.

In the end, I think the biggest thing you can do for yourself is just have confidence in yourself and your writing ability. The best way to improve is to practice, and I'd say just being aware of your shortcomings paves the way for improvement. Just keep trucking, and the rest will follow.
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RE: Critique and Advice; the treadmill of adventuring.
If the suggestions are seriously out of line with what you're willing to accept, the thing to do is just say that. The audience here is pretty understanding.
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RE: Critique and Advice; the treadmill of adventuring.
Thanks for the advice guys :) Things are going ok with my new adventure so far, I was more referring to past experiences and how to avoid those pitfalls. I'll try to make sure that something is happening each update and let people know if the suggestions don't fit the tone.
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RE: Critique and Advice; the treadmill of adventuring.
Any good advice for bringing back an old adventure?

I wound up taking an unexpectedly long hiatus from the little adventure I had going here and i'm wondering how to go about bringing it back and getting some more interest in it now that I have the time / energy to work on the adventure more.
Karies - a forum adventure (Hiatus)
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RE: Critique and Advice; the treadmill of adventuring.
I think just bringing it back will be enough to draw interest, especially if it's a short adventure. People who haven't read it before would be more willing to with a short adventure. I'm not saying a longer adventure can't attract attention, but I think it is harder to dedicate to a new 20+ page adventure versus a new 1-10 page adventure.

For me, I always read new adventures with 1-2 pages, and use the Black dot above adventures I've replied to (but don't remember) to remind me that I was interested at some point.

You can also advertise your updates on Discondor (Eagle Time's Discord) in the Update-Update channel.
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RE: Critique and Advice; the treadmill of adventuring.
I try to make stuff but it always seems too rushed? I just can’t think of anything interesting to describe, and that makes it that way, but I don’t know how to fix it. It’s hard. :((((

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RE: Critique and Advice; the treadmill of adventuring.
(07-22-2018, 06:01 PM)Thalia V1 Wrote: »I try to make stuff but it always seems too rushed? I just can’t think of anything interesting to describe, and that makes it that way, but I don’t know how to fix it. It’s hard. :((((
You tend to describe everything very succinctly and straightforwardly (which isn't necessarily a bad thing) so if you want to 'slow down' your writing I think the simplest way would be to expand on your account of events.

You could try to keep the senses in mind- how does your character experience the events along each method of perception? You don't have to elaborate on every single one, but adding in more descriptions of textures, tastes, smells, etc. would let you longer longer on what they were experiencing and make your writing more vivid. The same goes for describing the internal experiences of the character- you could throw in some exploration of their emotions if you think it'd help the story.

Of course, you've also created a kind of conversational style of writing instead of plain narration (at least in 3 Doors), so you could also try to lean into the dialogue between protagonist and readers more. Maybe they have more questions for the Porters, or strong opinions to share, or feel the need to express their emotions?

I'll admit I'm not exactly an expert writer of prose (also, this response is pretty late and it seems like you've moved on from being current narrator of 3 Doors?), but I hope these ideas help somehow?
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RE: Critique and Advice; the treadmill of adventuring.
(07-29-2018, 02:41 AM)vie Wrote: »
(07-22-2018, 06:01 PM)Thalia V1 Wrote: »I try to make stuff but it always seems too rushed? I just can’t think of anything interesting to describe, and that makes it that way, but I don’t know how to fix it. It’s hard. :((((
You tend to describe everything very succinctly and straightforwardly (which isn't necessarily a bad thing) so if you want to 'slow down' your writing I think the simplest way would be to expand on your account of events.

You could try to keep the senses in mind- how does your character experience the events along each method of perception? You don't have to elaborate on every single one, but adding in more descriptions of textures, tastes, smells, etc. would let you longer longer on what they were experiencing and make your writing more vivid. The same goes for describing the internal experiences of the character- you could throw in some exploration of their emotions if you think it'd help the story.

Of course, you've also created a kind of conversational style of writing instead of plain narration (at least in 3 Doors), so you could also try to lean into the dialogue between protagonist and readers more. Maybe they have more questions for the Porters, or strong opinions to share, or feel the need to express their emotions?

I'll admit I'm not exactly an expert writer of prose (also, this response is pretty late and it seems like you've moved on from being current narrator of 3 Doors?), but I hope these ideas help somehow?

Oh, right! I’ll try do that in the future. Thanks for the advice!

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RE: Critique and Advice; the treadmill of adventuring.
I had an old adventure that I had only just started a while back, (Almost an entire year now!) but it never really... got anywhere, as I had to abandon it due to College, as well as a mental strain from other life happenings.

Is it worth it do you think to try and reboot it? Or should I try to make a crack at another storyline? My main worry with a reboot is doing the intro all all over again, as im afraid it just won't feel the same.
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RE: Critique and Advice; the treadmill of adventuring.
I'm not familiar with your adventure, but here's some advice.

If you made the adventure on Eagle Time, someone here will probably remember it. Further, even if nobody remembers your adventure, having a backlog will put people off, but there's a few adventures here which are quite long, but still get new readers. It's ok to just pick up and continue as if nothing happened.

On reboots: If you make the intro the same as last time, then it's probably not going to feel as good. Just don't force it into going exactly how you planned, and you'll be fine.

Really this whole thing is your decision to make. Do you still like the story, or do you prefer the universe?
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