You Wake Up In A Bar

You wake up in a bar.

The counter sits in front of you; in a moment, as you bring yourself weakly to an upright position, you notice you're behind it. You are surrounded by an array of dust-covered bottles and apparatus, as well as labels and dials you can't possibly recognize. You have never been a bartender.

In fact, you're unsure if you have ever... been. Anything.

The air is oddly warm. Though this tavern is dimly lit, you can spot rays of golden sunshine slicing their way through a decrepit door at the far corner-- and you can hear something undoing the locks.

However, before any of that can be handled in detail... it's time to gather some information on yourself. In a universe filled with billions of known species, nothing is too strange to appear behind a bar counter.

What are you?



Check out other things in the YWUNIVERSE:
You Wake Up in Some Guy's House
Join party members You, Vebbin and Stax on an April Fool's romp through some guy's house before it all disappears.

Ghostwriter
Civvie, a Harbinger, describes a day in the life as a nickel-writer-- and asks for help in creating a universe.

IRREGULAR PULSE
A group of old friends try to communicate with the memory sector 'Memoria'.

Pairtree
Time to run through the universe with your partner Pat and get as much value as you can. Legally...?

VEBBINQUEST
VEBBIN is controlled by you for twenty hours on April Fool's. Once the time is up, your quest is over.


Interested in starting YWUIAB at a later point than the opening? Feel free to jump ahead to a recap update, which should bring you up to speed! You can always read back later.

JUMP TO:
Page 9 Recap and Update

Page 15 Recap and Update

Page 21 Recap and Update (Day 2 Start)

Author's NotesShow

Hey! I'm starting an adventure again. I think this is starting on a better foot than CHIRAL, so it should last for the foreseeable future if things don't go terribly awry.

This one will be text-focussed, but hopefully will contain the occasional bit of art. I would appreciate help with stuff like character portraits as time goes on, but for now we might be fine? Who knows!

(a character portrait for your protagonisto would be unbelievably neat)

Adventure Art!Show

Drinkmaster Greene, by Myeth!Show

Drinkmaster Greene by Meowtastic! Thank ya so much!Show

HeyBartender, by Myeth!Show

Greene in their mindspace with some Void Cats, by Myeth!Show

I am currently taking any and all species/patron/lore/art prompts for YWUIAB! If you'd like to drop a patron in, or have a fun idea for a species in this grand and vast universe, or anything like that, feel free to post it in the thread or PM me if you'd like to keep it a surprise! <3

A Cat In A Robot Suit

>An animatronic nutcracker

>A hive mind made up of tiny lawyers

>The Eternal Haberdasher

>Very thirsty

>A moss-covered deer-taur with crystaline antlers

>A rabbi, a nun and a priest

>A sentient ham sandwich

Human, the only human.

> A humanoid with a potted succulent for a head

Another bar.

A Cat In A Robot Suit

SpoilerShow

SpoilerShow

Look, I'm going to be 100% honest. Myeth's drawing is amazing, and I kinda just love that idea now but I'm still gonna throw a dumb hat onto the hat stack. Then we can pack them all up. A hat stack pack.

The solar bodies have aligned. The stars, myriad in their wonder, have perfectly focused you into existence, a being of pure energy.

While you did not exist before now, and while you have never been a bartender, and may not even understand what a bartender is, having yet to form a language, your appearance was no accident. You are here for a reason. This place is your purpose.

Plus, you're sort of attached to this spot, as part of the eons old ritual that summons your kind into existence. It's a little inconvenient, but hey. Not like you need to go anywhere, right? Everything you need is right here. Like... This thing! and... This other thing! Just tap them together until you figure out how they interact. Atta light.

Whoever or whatever walks through that door is clearly here to employ your services, and will make everything make sense. Yes.

Just make sure you don't get wet. That is like a x4 weakness with that combination.

>A shark with tank treads instead of fins

>The absolute worst wizard in the world. Your powers are fueled by beer.

SpoilerShow

You can see quality gettin lower n lower as ya go down cus im doin these at like 4 am in the morning cus of major art groove that slowly got replaced my tiredness
Were p fun to draw, even if they were rushed as hell

>You are a werewolf office worker. Every night, you turn into a werewolf no matter what's the phase of the moon. The office worker and werewolf are two different entities, personalities, sharing one body. The werewolf somehow owns a farm to its name and goes there every night.

You are a Mothgrant-- and by the weakness of the sacred moss in your core, you can tell very clearly that you are the last of your species. This thought strikes you so rapidly and so suddenly that you're barely able to process the rest of your own being.

You stand at a mighty five feet tall, clearing the bar counter by a couple of heads, and your stiff, crystalline antlers increase this height in a very... semantic fashion. You possess no clothes, so as to best absorb reflected sunlight and take in rainwater-- but all of this knowledge is only instinctual. You're still very unsure as to how exactly you're meant to even move around in this body.

But you feel like you're learning quickly.

The decrepit door at the other end of the bar finally clicks open. Beaming widely from the entrance is another figure-- the real source of what you thought was sunlight. It saunters up to you casually, and you realize suddenly that it looks exactly like you. Aside from the whole glowing deal. That's not something you've got going for you.

The figure speaks.








You eye your surroundings. There are so many bottles, so many labels-- none of which you're capable of reading. Canisters of glowing purple liquid atop a stool catch your eye-- is that what alcohol is? Maybe it's the gel-like substance growing beneath the cash register? One of the clear bottles hanging from the ceiling, boiling incessantly?

You're going to need to serve this patron something.

Author's NotesShow

Thank you so so so much to Myeth for the art! It's all fantastic, and all of it will be included in future updates with future characters. Same for all the other species suggestions, and any art made in the future! I haven't mapped this fully out yet, but if you'd like to have a patron enter the bar, I'm accepting almost any submission of any kind, especially if your submitted patron has a particular order they'd like from the bartender.

get a papercut and bleed out into the cup

Obviously, it's whatever's in the cash register.

Fermented Unicorn Tears

Just grab one of the clear bottles that hang from the ceiling. Pour it into drinking vessel.

Frantically, you begin gathering materials. The rumbling bottle from above you, a tiny cup of runny liquid-- even a coin from the cash register. You pile it haphazardly into a cup, and finish it off by cutting a bit of your mossy skin, eliciting a pinch of pain, as well as a sickly-sweet-smelling nectar that oozes on top. The drink seems to be barely holding itself together in the cup, but you've done it.

You have made your first drink.



The patron scoffs gently at your attempts, and with a slight hesitation, begins downing it, slow gulp by slow gulp.






It sets a peculiar bronze-looking cocktail shaker on the counter, covered in runes you have no clue how to read.








By making your first drink, you have unlocked The Cabinet-- your repository for all known substances which can be implemented into your bartending efforts.

The Starwood Bough.
I am Mr. Moonshine.

Bar: "This Place Good!"
Self: Drinkmaster Green

Voting for a Combo of the two names above;
Drinkmaster Moonshine
and call the bar Valhalla
Maybe call the Bar the Unshaken. Y'got a potent Mixmaster Artifact, can't hurt to advertise it.

Thank Your Unknown Patron, Introduce yourself, cautiously imply that maybe they'd like to reciprocate your introduction, if they really really want to, and ask them if there's perhaps a Specific Cocktail they would enjoy (and the composition thereof) because if you're doing this as a Job then it might be nice to start off knowing at least one recipe and they deserve something actually appealing for the help they've given you. On The House, if that won't break some Deep Bartenderly Code, and as Payment for telling you how to make the cocktail in the first place, if it does

Bar: swagshack
Self: swagman42

"Thanks dudebro thats hella of you also what would happen if i chugged all of this stuff at the same time jus askin"

>bar: The Frond

>You: Greenie