ZooStuck 4: ZooStuck Mafia - Day 10: Murder Production Substantially Up

Wait What, A Lynch Is Happening

Akumu - 4 (Agent, Sruixan, Granolaman, Kieros)
Netscape - 1 (qwerx3)

Deadline is in about two hours.

PLEASE DO NOT DIVEST (ME) OF (MY (SHARES)). (I) AM BUT A ((SIMPLE (ROBOT)) WHO WANTS TO KNOW WHAT (LOVE) IS). (I) HARBOR ((NO (ILL (WILL))) TOWARDS (ANY OTHER (SHAREHOLDER))).

(I) DID HUG (GRANOLAMAN) BUT ONLY BECAUSE (I) WAS AFRAID THAT (THEY) WOULD DIE AND THAT (I) WOULD LOSE (MY CHANCE) TO HUG THEM FOREVER.

About five minutes left before day end.

* SAD AND DISTRESSED BEEPING *

The PowerPoint hums to life.

"Wait, what, there's an actual shareholder vote? Hang on, hang on. Processing... Akumu's shares have been revoked. Akumu is no longer authorized to be in this building."

A moment later, Akumu is unceremoniously ejected into the void.

"Please stand by for information on former shareholder Akumu."

You are a robot, that runs on love! But you aren't really sure what that is... you've always had a human taking care of you but now that they've expired you must search for a new source of love, before it's too late!

Akumu was a robot seeking love. He had already determined that there was a significant correlation between hugs and love, so he decided to hug other shareholders to gain it.

Every night, he could choose someone to hug. This would turn their action into a hug, which would also turn their target's action into a hug, and so on down the line.

He was looking for three spirits that were spreading themselves among the players. He would win if he hugged all three spirits himself, with a half-win if they received hugs that weren't from him.

He was completely uninterested in the conspiracy. He only wanted to give hugs.

In fact, his desire to spread hugs was so strong that it probably won't disappear with his death...

"Information provided. Please take this into consideration before the next meeting."

There's some mumbling about demons.

"We are unable to answer any questions about the status of any demonic apocalypses that may or may not have occurred."

It's night, everyone please get your actions in promptly.

All night actions are in, but I'm not quite up for starting the next day. I'll get to that tomorrow, I guess.

Everyone wakes up and... hey, they're all here! Looks like there were no deadly events during the night and...

Wait, what was that?

CRASH!

A meteor crashes through the walls, killing Not The Author. He has a smile on his face as it crushes him.

I had a dream that Russians decided to pray to a volcano satan-god to throw a giant meteor at their country, so it could warm up a little.

It went about as well as you would expect.

Not The Author was somehow enlisted as the high priest of an evil volcano god with command over meteors.

He didn't really understand what had happened, or what it had to do with this conspiracy he'd been thrust into. Still, he was willing to go along with it.

In accordance with orders, he could pray with someone for a meteor to come. This had no particular effects on its own. However, when half the living players (himself included) had prayed for the meteor, it would arrive.

And, of course, it would kill him when it did. Or the person he secretly appointed as his successor on his death. If neither of them were alive, though, the meteor wouldn't come anyways.

Of course, his win condition was for the meteor to be summoned. Regardless of the consequences.

So now you've got another dead body, a meteor, and a big hole in the wall. Just another day at the Will Smith Corporation, clearly.

Livelist:

-qwerx3
-Ixcaliber
-AgentBlue
-Shredded
-Kíeros
-Sruixan
-Granolaman
-Kaynato
-earthexe

With 9 alive, it takes 5 to lynch. Soft lynch has been abolished due to low player count.
Deadline is midnight on Tuesday, Nov 15.

I don't think any necromancy happened last night, but I do think I learned a secret. Gimme a few hours to ponder the significance of my night.

I am in utter disbelief.

Um. Um. Well. Um. We've. Um. We've only managed to. Um. We. Um. We've got. Um, a lot of conspiracists. Um. Among us, and, um. I'm starting to think that, um, Nottles' claims about, um, the jet, were, um, somewhat. Um. Maybe it was, um, a lie, and, um, I'm quite upset about that, and, um, we're, um, um, um, we're running out of people, and, um, um, um, I'm, um, I'm scared...

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Given how this game is going I don't think we're going to be gathering 5 votes on a single target...

*goes back to sleep*

Given how this game is going I don't think we're going to be gathering 5 votes on a single target...

*goes back to sleep*

Um, um, you're being, um, inflammatory, and um, we've got no, um, time, for that to um,

Vote: qwerx3

We, um, we have to take action, because we, um, I don't know, I, um, I'm, um, I just want to fix things...

Yeah, I'm not entirely sure, but I think Kaynato would probably be a good idea to keep alive. Call it my gamer's intuition.

But yeah, especially with so few people alive, we definitely need to do something during the day. We can't just rely on guessing if there's possibly a non-mafia killer (Is it the mafia? I don't even remember the plotline) helping us out. If we want any chance of finding them out, we need to work together, and unfortunately, four days of effective no-lynches aren't helpful (I'm sorry for one of those).

Well I guess the mafia is flavored the conspiracy here. And well, they don't get to know each others' identities, so it's basically everyone for themselves.

I would probably prefer if there were just no lynches and no kills at all. Then again maybe the mafia killer role jams when trying to kill another mafia. (there weren't really any kills last night, since NTA's death is sort of self-triggered)

Counting The Votes Again, Because Sometimes We Get Them

qwerx3 - 1 (AgentBlue)

Five to lynch, no more soft lynch. Deadline's midnight on Tuesday.

Does anyone have any wincons that don't involve people dying that they'd like to share? My information is pertinent to that request.

What the fuck even is a "wincon," man? Everything is going to shit.

I... I'm not a carpenter, I can't fix this. I'm a fucking IT specialist.

I just want to find a particular person so I can get my fucking normal job back.

Then again maybe the mafia killer role jams when trying to kill another mafia. (there weren't really any kills last night, since NTA's death is sort of self-triggered)

Wait, is that how the killing role would work in a jester mafia game? Let me just look at Jester Mafia and... yeah... okay.

You know that statement that we should probably keep Kaynato alive? Yeah, about that. I'm much more certain it's wrong now. So Vote: Kaynato

That is a suboptimal decision.

Sidebar: Kaynato post in thread dammit or I'll invoke the name of Chwoka to come do it for you.

Unfortunately, I am an ostrich.

Wait, ok. So, we are playing mafia.
I can confirm Granola on "Please kill me in my sleep."
Do you trust me?

I personally think that ostriches are trustworthy creatures.

I don't trust you actually, I just don't think lynching you right now is optimal.

Yes I Am Checking This Thread, Who Suggested Otherwise

qwerx3 - 1 (AgentBlue)
Kaynato - 1 (Kieros)

Five to lynch, no more soft lynch. Deadline's midnight on Tuesday.