Swamped

yeah, get some more books!

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Okay, any suggestions on what sort of books, since I don't want to do another whole update just for that?

A book about frogs, snails, and a bitter rivalry
A story about some pigs and how their various houses hold up against a ravenous enemy
A book on magic tricks (sleight of hand etc)! The text looks difficult but it has helpful pictures.

A book that, after 2 pages in, you realize is an instruction manual for the ovens used in the cafeteria

An embarrassing swamp porn book.

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You find a few picture books, this time double-checking to make sure they aren't by Juliet. You find one about frogs and snails, and one about some pigs.

You also find an interesting book about sleight of hand tricks. It's hard to read at your skill level, but it has illustrations, and it might be a skill worth developing.

You wonder if you might find a book about the rain, but a thorough search of the shelf turns up nothing. Well, not nothing, exactly, but Beauties of the Bog doesn't really seem like your kind of reading material. You also can't see much use for these instructions on using the oven, other than perhaps finding out how to keep it from igniting the swamp gas. John, John, Tom, and the Rain has a promising title, but it turns out to just be a hollow book with a bottle in it. You decide that it's probably for the best to leave that alone.

You suppose it's not that surprising. The rain is a sore spot for most of the knights, so few would be interested in reading about it. Though the medic's bookshelf seems an odd place to hide your bottles.

Regardless, you think these three books should be a more interesting read. You thank John Medic for his time again, and head out towards the lounge. You're thinking of asking Lisa about the advanced rules for Swamprats, even though you doubt you'll play it very well.

But this time, you don't see Lisa right away when you arrive at the lounge. In fact, it's unusually crowded inside. What could be going on here?

Someone reported a raindrop. Everyone's really nervous.

Awww, someone brought in a friendly swamp chicken!

Lover's quarrel

You soon find the spectacle at the center of the lounge; two knights are arguing. Looking a bit more closely, you recognize one of them as Lisa's rival from yesterday, Grey. Whoever he's arguing with has a swamp chicken perched on their head.

"It's not going to rain, Stewart," Grey snarls. "We're not even three weeks out from the last storm. It never rains that soon after a storm. You probably just saw some swampwater dripping off a tree branch or something."

"I know rain when I see it. I was raised on a swamp, Grey. And the rain may not have been as bad there, but I sure learned to tell the difference between a raindrop and a drip. The big thing is, rain's clean, least until it hits the ground. These drops were clear as day, clearer even. That means rain."

"In just one place, though? Since when does the rain work like that?"

"I don't know why it was just raining lightly there. I just know that it's starting."

"We can't just hole up in here because it might be raining! There's too much work to be done!"

"You know as well as I do that nothing's getting done outside until the rain stops. And you know I wouldn't lie about the rain to get out of work. You of all people must know how much pride I put into getting things done."

"But it can't be raining! It's too soon!"

"Doesn't matter what you think," Stewart shrugs, pulling down the chicken and petting it. "I already reported it in, and that means we assume the rain's coming. Unless the scouting team comes back and says I was wrong, we're stuck here, so we may as well make the most of it."

"And what about that thing?" Grey shouts, pointing at the chicken. "We can't have wild creatures running around in the base, and I'm not going to make an exception for you."

"Well, I can't leave her out in the rain, can I? That'd just be cruel. Besides, the worst she's going to do is lay eggs. Swampcocks may be territorial little bastards, but the hens are docile. And, because I know you're gonna ask, I already checked her for fly eggs. She's clean."

Grey puts a hand to his forehead and groans.

"I hate it when you're right," he sighs. "But the moment that teams comes back and says there's no rain, you're putting that hen back where you found her. Understood?"

"Fair. I'll let her out once the rain stops."

As the argument calms down, you suddenly realize that Riley is standing next to you and looking very embarrassed.

"Is everything all right?" you ask.

"Other than my brother bringing a wild swamphen into the base and getting into an argument with his boyfriend in front of absolutely everyone, just fine," Riley sighs. "Oh, and he's probably right about the rain, so there's that too."

"Oh." You don't really know how else to respond.

In fact, you're not sure if this is the best time to talk to anyone. The whole idea that it might rain has everyone on edge, and you're prone to saying things you'll regret. At a time like this, it's probably best to stay quiet.

But you've got no idea how long it will be before the scouts report back about the rain. What are you supposed to do while you wait?

Ask sergeant greenwoods about the rain. as a superior officer, it's her duty educate you on rain and not get immediately upset about the rain like everyone else does, even if there's apparently plenty of reason to be immediately upset.

Is it true that swamp chickens have teeth?

Your first thought is to ask Sergeant Greenwoods what you should be doing to prepare for the rain. She's your commanding officer, after all.

Unfortunately, you can't find her anywhere in the lounge, and you're not sure where she might be. For all you know she could be out with the scouting team.

In fact, there don't seem to be any officers in the lounge right now. None that you recognize, anyway, and if they were here you doubt they'd have let that argument become such a spectacle.

Your suspicions are confirmed as you hear someone rushing in and shout "BURGUNDY'S COMING!", followed by excited shouts of "hide the chicken!" and the next thing you know, everyone's shuffled into orderly lines and somebody's shoved a swamphen into your hands. Which, you can't help but notice, has rather sharp teeth in its beak.

It appears that the task of hiding the swamphen from the watchful gaze of Sergeant Burgundy has been thrust upon you, likely because you've got the lowest rank in the whole base. So how are you going to handle this?

Just kind of, stand in the corner inconspicuously and just hold the chicken. the best disguise is to not act suspicious and attract attention to yourself!

Does your uniform happen to come with any jacket components? If so, shove the chicken in there. Otherwise, under your shirt. Chickens are very dim creatures, and if it is covered with a cloth it will think it's night and go to sleep. Simple! Easy! Inconspicuous!

Uh.... uh.... uh..... this is, uh, a piñata

You decide to just shuffle off to the back corner of the room, hoping that the sheer number of knights around will keep Burgundy's attention off of you.

Of course, there's also the problem of how to keep the chicken from squawking. Fortunately for you, it turns out that Riley's already in your corner.

"They quiet down if they think it's dark, so they don't alert predators," Riley says, pulling a spare shirt out of their pack. "And it doesn't take a lot to fool them. Just cover their eyes and that's it."

Riley puts the shirt over the hen's head, then carefully stands in front of you to make the chicken even less visible. At that moment, Sergeant Burgundy rushes in, and you can't help but notice a sling on her left arm.

"Now listen up," she snaps, and you feel a little sick as her eyes turn in your direction. "I know there's a rain warning, but that doesn't mean you can all be goofing off. If we confirm that the rain's started, you're all marching to the auditorium straight away, is that clear?"

A chorus of "yes Sarge" echoes through the room.

"And if we find out this was a false alarm, everyone's going right back to work. Well, everyone except Stewart, because I will be having a very firm talk with him about not sending the entire base in a panic over nothing. But either way, this is not time off, and even if you're going to spend it in the lounge, don't think you can just relax. Do I make myself clear?"

"Yes Sarge!"

"Good. Now that we've gotten that sorted out, Marshall, would you care to explain to me why you are holding a wild swamphen with a shirt over its head?"

The sheer power of the accusation cuts right through the crowd, and everyone instinctively steps aside to avoid getting between you and the sergeant. As she draws closer, you feel more and more nervous.

For a moment you consider trying to bluff, suggesting it's some sort of toy. Maybe claiming it's what Tom Eighth has been working on this whole time. But a simple glance into Burgundy's eyes tells you that approach would never work.

So how are you going to handle this?

"The shirt... keeps the hen from squawking..."

Take the blame. You found it outside and you were worried about it with the rain coming and all, so...

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Uh.... uh.... uh..... this is, uh, a piñata

"Well," you say, "the shirt keeps the hen from squawking."

"And why, Marshall, is there a swamphen in the base in the first place?"

"Well, it's supposed to rain... I mean, I think it must have wandered into the base, and I was thinking about taking it back out, but then I heard the rain was coming and I thought, well, with all the fuss everyone makes about the rain should I really let this poor thing out, and, er, um, then you came in and started shouting."

"We can't have wild animals in the base, Marshall. I'm also quite sure that you're not the one who found it, you're just the poor fool who got stuck with it." She laughs. "That used to be me back when I was in training. Still, I won't look too closely into the matter of who's really responsible, as long as you get that thing out of here promptly." She glances at her injured arm. "I'd do it myself, but I'd want both arms free in case it got away. Just take it to the front door and let it out. Don't go any further than that, not with the rain warning."

You nod slowly. After the way everyone's been talking about the rain, you're still not sure if this is a good idea, but getting on the wrong side of Sergeant Burgundy is definitely a bad idea. You head off towards the front door and explain to the guards what you're doing.

"Poor thing," one of the guards sighs, walking towards the gate lever. "I know we can't have animals, we're not set up for it and they don't fare well outside of the wild. But it won't stand a chance in the rain."

"You really think it's going to rain?" the other one asks. "It's too soon after the big storm, if you ask me."

"Well, I certainly hope it doesn't. But we have to take the report seriously." He pulls on the lever and the gates slowly open.

"Be quick," he says. "If it does rain, we don't want to hold the gates open long."

You take a careful step out, but it seems bright and sunny. Or as close to it as you've seen it get in the swamp. Maybe Riley's brother was wrong about the rain after all.

Whether he was or not, you're the one stuck doing something about this chicken. Are you just going to let it run free until the rain comes, as you were asked, or is there something else you could do?

yeah release the hen underneath the dock.