Literally Fucking D&D

I cleave the vending machine in half with my axe and then play a sick riff with it

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I steal someone else's bag of food.

I steal ICGC's heart

I turn into a bear

now now, a52, i can only give it away for charitable reasons. If you're a regular robin hood, i happily bequeath my heart unto you. If not, I will hire all 666 of my lawyers. To murder you. Yeah, they don't practice law anymore.

I wonder who i'm going to hire to defend me after I'm charged?

I count how many coins I have on me, while contemplating whether to get Coca-Cola Zero or Diet Coke or Diet Coke Vanilla and... Oh my god is that Coca-Cola Zero Vanilla!? SCORE! But wait... How many coins does it cost again?

I sneak attack the Vending Machine.

Sneakily, of course.

You do this and sUDDENLY THERES A BIG POLICE MAN WITH 500 ATTACK POINTS AND 1 HEALTH!!!1!1!!

I turn into two bears

The big man gets scared and runs away, you take your delicious Yum Yum Yum Super Yum Chipperonis.

What do next?

options are:

1. Off self.

2. Consume candy.

3. Go downstairs into lobby and shoot it up.

Consume lobby.

But stealthily.

go try do heroin in the lobby, find a distinct lack of lobby, shoot heroin off Granola's back instead

The lobby is made out of heroin, you dingus.

I play some alternative rock to set the mood

I commune with some herons instead

sell the lobby on the black market.

You get a shit ton of cash money

OK NEW CHARACTER!111

My new character is the shitton of cash money.

My character is lods of emone

I commune with sand dollars and goldfinches

You become the money.

I spend myself.

I spend myself.

but on what?

cloning machines? Are you spending yourself to counterfeit more of yourself to spend??? WHAT HAS THE AGENCONOMY COME TO

I spend myself... ON CREDIT