The thread for flipping shits (and tables)

I'm pretty sure I can't still be alive and be this tired.

All I want to do is create something but my mind is always so cluttered that any time I sit down to write I can't even start. I'm so fucking worried that I'll always be like this.

I feel like I can't even get my mind together enough to properly vent.

im so fucking tired in too many ways

It's time to bring back the ol scorpion bucket gambit

That'd be a good idea since i don't have a third arm in my mouth to give him the finger anymore

Even though that sounds sucky, seeing a post from you brightens my day! Hi Ed! looong time, sorry there is bullshit going on.

Hi btp, i'm glad you're still around.

I slept for 10 hours but I'm still rediculously tired. Ugh

Why is it so warm, this is Washington, I want my rain baaaaack....

It's 300 K here, why is it so hot...

it's al gore seeking vengeance for all you non-believers of climate change. He is the weatherman. And he WILL change the weather to suit otherworldly interests......

I need a mental health week. Or a break from life, idk.

I need about 3000000 hours of sleep. Why am I so tired

really want to quit my job rn

I detest people so goddamn much and hate myself for doing so

I'm restrained enough to not go making people's lives stressful or generally difficult, why can't you do me a fucking solid and reciprocate

i'm having something of a breakdown because once again i've failed to make even the slightest facade of attempting to look for work (whether due to general personal shittiness, overwhelming anxiety that kicks in the moment i actually attempt to look for a job, or my top tier procrastination skills (/adhd) who even knows at this point) and i have an appointment in an hour and twenty minutes where i'm gonna have to explain either that i'm not trying hard enough, i don't know what i'm doing, i'm just a terrible human being in general, or whatever excuse i can come up with to hope that i don't get my benefits cut.

i really hate myself sometimes

Ix, I'm on disability aid essentially because the entire job-hunting process causes me intense stress. (Officially, it's an autistic spectrum disorder, but the reason I took this path is more "I can't get a job or feel functional when working for someone" more than "I can't handle the actual work".) Something similar may be going on for you.

If you haven't tried antidepressants, you should see someone who can give you a prescription. If you have tried antidepressants and still had the same problems job-hunting, then you should look into a diagnosis and what disability aid you may qualify for.

Either way, the place to start is with a mental health professional. I don't know if you're already seeing someone for that, but if you're not, then you should see what you can do about getting that set up.

Yeah, me too! When i was on a benefit, anyway. My doctor was very willing to sign the forms required to get me a disability allowance instead; i also got sent to a different place that specifically helps people with mental health issues find work. As a result of both of those things, my case manager also told me i could skip meetings if i was feeling bad; just that i needed to text ahead to say i wasn't coming.

I ended up having to come off of the benefit entirely because it was still stressing me out badly enough to start thinking about suicide again (i have... severe depression) but that wasn't because of the people there; just from the system that kept getting pulled back by our shitty government.


Also update from my earlier post: i am taking the mental health week. I still feel like garbage but less like dying, so progress????

I'm so overwhelmed with work and school and personal stuff that no matter how much sleep I manage to get I'm still tired and stressed and really unwilling to go through with everything I have to do.

I guess I made it this far but jesus christ just let me have a day off. Just one day off. Then again, if I take that day off I'll fall into the habit again and it's so hard to dig myself out of that

I'm just feeling irritable and disgusted with myself and depressed and all I want to do is programming but I get like maybe half an hour available for that a day and I have way too much homework I am procrastinating.

I get stuck in this cycle where I tell myself I'm doing homework but really I'm doing nothing at all because I want to be doing something else, which of course makes me take way longer to finish/give up on it and makes me have less time on the things I actually want to do.

Somehow homework > fun things, procrastination > homework, but fun things > procrastination.

I'm doing it right now.

right fucking now, hanging around on this goddamn site getting fucking nothing done

im so fucking tired

my motivation is at an all time low and its only getting worse

my adhd meds are also doing shit all at this point again

its like im back in fucking third grade when it took me two hours to complete a single fucking spelling sheet

my classes are so easy. everything im learning in math i taught myself at least two years ago. everybody in orchestra is fucking imbecile who couldnt find a pitch if it was shoved up their ass, leaving me to babysit them. chemistry was fun, but we already took the final and there's basically nothing left so its pretty much just an empty period from here on out. japanese is laughably simplistic and slow-paced, and social studies is a fucking joke.

the only challenging class happens to be english, which, funnily enough, also happens to be the class that i have a fucking mental block against and have had since elementary school and the class with like three fucking projects due next week.

its such a horrible combination of boredom and stress.

its basically a textbook recipe for depression and ive had to deal with this every spring since like the start of middle school

i need to be either doing homework or sleeping right now but theres no way in hell im doing either of those things

im too bored to find something to do

im too tired to go to sleep

im too worried about homework to do any of it

im too angry to fucking anything at all

everything about myself disgusts me

i hate how i think i hate how i look i hate all these whiny self pitying bullshit posts ive made in this thread i hate my dependence on unfulfilling fake online relationships instead of real friends i hate how much i procrastinate on even things i enjoy i hate i hate i hate i hate hate hate hate myself

i hate that im not going to be able to fall asleep after this so ill just keep on hating myself until two in the morning and tomorrow it will be even worse

i hate how much i lie to everybody i know
i hate how desperate i am to my friends
i hate how much i spend alone by myself doing nothing but getting worse and ranting to myself over the internet like some kind of fucking 12 year old

the worst thing about depression is that you can be just a little bit down for a few weeks and then you'll have a few great days and then out of no where youre just super depressed. my mood went straight from an 8 to a 4 to a 1 within two days.

my car broke cause apparently oil is a thing cars need