FAQ me up

Ask me some common questions, for each of which I will write the answer in >5 minutes of seeing it.

What will cause the end of humanity the soonest?

Because WHY NOT start on a dark note.

the previous sentence is a question that may or may not be rhetorical.

Why, God, why?

What's your opinion on Loki? (asking for a friend)

who's garf

How's you day going I hope it's going well

What will cause the end of humanity soonest?
NASA will encounter aliens and they’ll see how screwed up we are and destroy the planet before we can escape. That or “The Great Carbon Monoxide Extinction”.

Why, God, why?
He’s in his experimental phase. It should be over in several million years.

What's your opinion on Loki?
His existence can be entertaining, but I really don’t have an interest in him or his feelings.

How do you beat ganon dorf?
Ganondorf is a heavyweight with a linear recovery, so he is quite easy to defeat. Most combos work on him even if he is past the required percentage. When off the stage, a couple projectiles or extended aerials will be enough to make sure he doesn’t come back.

Who's garf?
Garf is a loveable™ orange cat that likes lasagna and possesses human intelligence. However, as human rights don’t apply to him, he has disguised himself as a regular cat and pet for his own protection.

How's you day going I hope it's going well?
Thanks! It has just started, but it is going well indeed.

fuckm or fuck, or..?
Fuckm, please.

What does my profile pic signify to you?

who's gorf?

How do I wake up?

what is the great carbon monoxide extinction

Can I help you find a seat?

What does my profile pic signify to you?
Screams escaping the body full force, like a dam breaking but the dam is a human person. With wings. And a cool hat.

Who's gorf?
Gorf is an NPC in runescape, famous for his quest antics and the unique rewards he gives, including “Essence of Bismal” and “Signed Autograph (Gorf)”. Gorf is a half-gnome who specialises in dark magic. He can be found in the Hipster Cave City of Denimark.

How do I wake up?
Select a number of sheep based on how heavy of a sleeper you are (20-30 for light sleepers vs up to 500 for heavy sleepers). Then, start counting backwards from that number while imagining the sheep disappearing. Imagine the drama that occurs, as the community of sheep attempt to solve the mystery. Imagine the collapse of the sheeple government and the chaos afterwards. Visualise the last few sheep meeting up, reconciling with themselves while clinging onto the others, before one by one, they disappear. And then, at the last sheep dissolving into nothingness, you’ll wake up.

What is the great carbon monoxide extinction?
The Great Carbon Monoxide Extinction is a theoretical event in the future when 50-99% of life on earth is eradicated from the sudden atmospheric shift due to an abundance of CO being produced.

Can I help you find a seat?
No thanks, I’ve got one right here.

what is love?

which is the best color of pie?

how do trees stay up?

who is your favorite philosopher, and why?

What is love?
A very strong feeling that makes the world go round.

Which is the best color of pie?
Golden Brown. Open faced pies are inferior.

How do trees stay up?
Confidence. Also roots.

Who is your favorite philosopher, and why?
I don't have a favourite philosopher, but I do like Aristophanes, who isn't really a philosopher.

what is the worst thing you overheard today

What is a formula for how many ways can you factor a generic integer n into two Gaussian integers?

Dou you like ta dance?

well... how did i get here?
how do i work this?
where is that large automobile?
what is that beautiful house?
where does that highway go to?
am i right?
am i wrong?
my god, what have i done?!

is it the same as it ever was?

What is the worst thing you overheard today?
When I was at a crosswalk, a big guy right beside/behind me started laughing. I pretended to ignore him (which is easy with earbuds in), because I doubted it was about me, but then as I started walking he laughed harder. I feel so embaressed and self-concious, and I'm still not sure why or if he even was laughing at me...

What is a formula for how many ways can you factor a generic integer n into two Gaussian integers?
I have no idea.

Dou you like ta dance?
Yes, but not when there's an audience.

well... how did i get here?
Well, birth, presumably. Unless you mean here here, in that case, someone has defrauded and decieved you. You *probably* clicked on the link thinking it would be one think, when in fact it was another.

how do i work this?
Type a question in the box at the bottom, and press the button that says "Post" (probably).

where is that large automobile?
On the highway to hell.

what is that beautiful house?
I can't tell you.

where does that highway go to?
A destination.

am i right?
Yes.

am i wrong?
No.

my god, what have i done?!
Posted a lot of questions that I couldn't help but see all at once.

is it the same as it ever was?
No. Everything is in a state of constant flux. Unless you're talking about croissants. Then: yes, they're still good.

why do we dig?
Why do we dig the holes? We dig the holes to keep us free. That's why we dig the holes, we dig the holes to keep us free.

What should I have for breakfast tomorrow?

Heyweld, thanks a million for writing up that response message for my student! Is there any chance I could rope you into doing another?

What is the correct answer to this question?

Vampires or werewolves?

(hint: there is only one correct answer.
hint hint: It's not the first one)