Sack Boogies

>drink your cup of covfefe

>Ask if you can get a free Keuriglet, they're cute tho

is this pasteurized or do I have to worry about cowfee tuboogiulosis now

"So, uh, Professor... is this safe to drink?"



Macrocyst: "Oh, yes! Quite so! For although the wild shadow manifestations are malicious in nature, the ones in my laboratory have been safely bound.

"Thanks to our mastery of the New Science, we've been able to entangle Sack Boogies, inverting their instincts and binding their wills to the inner vortices of the precious Boogie Sacks."



"For you see, each Sack Boogie is birthed from shadows of a particular kind, and it is to these shadows that they seek to return at daybreak. Keuriglets, for example, are coffee-type, able to wholly conceal themselves in the shadows of coffee, disappearing entirely from our plane of existence, a process which we refer to as umbrification."



"Other kinds of shadows do not draw the Keuriglets with the same strength, nor can they umbrificate and disumbrificate in such shadows except with difficulty.

"But the Boogie Sacks are engineered to exploit this bond. Once a Sack Boogie has tasted the inner shadows of a Boogie Sack, it will be drawn to it even more strongly than to its own genesis shadow. Bound Sack Boogies will return to the sacks with great pleasure, serving faithfully at the command of their Sack Masters."



Macrocyst: "The trouble, of course, is capturing the Sack Boogies in the first place. They are dangerous in the extreme, posing an unceasing existential threat to humanity. Only with the help of aspiring young Sack Masters like yourself can we hope to delay our inevitable doom."

The professor is pretty much just rambling right now. As a big Sack-fan, you learned all this stuff years ago.

Anyways doc, you mentioned nightmares but these are a bit, uh. Not-Nightmarish. Cowfee there is pretty disturbing, but not really nightmarish per-say. Keuriglets practically look like good pet material. Not some deadly secret these little fellers have, is there?

...Oh, what about ones that live under beds? Blue, red eyes, lots of teeth?

"The Keuriglets don't look too scary, Professor. Are Sack Boogies really all that dangerous?

"Like, if I hypothetically had a toothy, red-eyed Sack Boogie under my bed for the last two years, that's pretty normal, right?"



Macrocyst: "We fear and avoid the Sack Boogies for good reason, Bingo. They may seem cute and unassuming, but their familiar--even benign--appearance is a weapon."

The professor starts trundling deeper into the laboratory while he talks. You follow along a pace or two behind.



Macrocyst: "When our settler ancestors first encountered the shadow demons, which they called Boogie Monsters, they were baffled. Some were driven to madness. Though they can inflict grievous injury upon man and machine, Sack Boogies cannot be harmed by human hand or weapon... indeed, they cannot be described or detected in the terms of the Old Science at all. The entire process of Umbrification is precluded by the principles upon which Old Science was founded!"



"...So the Old Science was abandoned. And the great scientists of history worked together to study the shadow beasts and unravel their secrets. Much of their ancient knowledge is now lost, but their breakthroughs led to the creation the Boogie Sacks and the formalization of the New Science.

"Of course, the Boogie Sacks themselves are only useful if you can first subdue a wild Sack Boogie. And since the only thing that can harm a Sack Boogie is another Sack Boogie, every prospective Sack Master needs a 'starter' Sack Boogie."



"So.. Are you ready to select your starter Sack-portable Boogie monster?"

>Ask if you can get a free Keuriglet, they're cute tho

"Can't I just have one of your Keuriglets? You've got like four or ten of them."



The professor's expression turns severe.

Macrocyst: "This is not a decision to made lightly, young Bingo. Every type of Sack Boogie has weaknesses and strengths in relation to the others. Your starter will have a major influence on how and whether you succeed as you begin your sacred duty."



Macrocyst: "You've already seen the Keuriglet, a coffee-type Sack Boogie. I have three other types of subdued Sack Boogies available for you to choose from. Here are the three types: "

Rock
Paper
Scissors

Oxygen, Heat and Fuel.
( I just wanted to say that Keuriglets are really cute and I like how you shade coffe, you should be proud of that! )

acidic, alkaline, and storage-type.


what, you expected all three to be related or oppose one another or something? no, these are just the ones i managed to grab.

Arch-type
Writer-type
Proto-type

Macrocyst: "Paper, Acid, and Punk."



"First we have a freshly hatched LARVELLUM. Being paper-type, it is especially strong against rock-type, but notably weak against scissor-type."



"Next we have a small but feisty SLURPENT, who emerged from the shadow of a beaker of hydrochloric acid."



"Finally, there's this SPARKPUG, discovered under a box of kindling."



Wow, tough choices! Which one will you pick?

>SLURPENT IS SURE A GOOD BOY

>befriend green slug

>SLURPENT IS SURE A GOOD BOY

You know who you're picking, no question about it!



"I choose SLURPENT!"

Professor Macrocyst motors up to the glass containment chamber.

Macrocyst: "Excellent. Now get your Boogie Sack ready; the beast was subdued earlier and should be pliant, but as soon as I open the door you'll need to nab it with your Boogie Sack before it breaks out of its subjugation funk."




The professor carefully opens the door.



OH DANG!



SLURPENT USED GLOOP SHOOP!

You don't have enough time to avoid the corrosive blast of gloop entirely, but if you act fast you can probably pick which part of your body should absorb the attack, leaving you with a cool scar to show off.

Unless you have a better idea?

Sacrifice hat.

Sacrifice hat.

In style.

You're no putz, after all.

>We have more hats but I don't think we have more faces or skin.

Sacrifice right arm, to match the professor!

Sacrifice hat.

In style.

You're no putz, after all.

>Yeah

> Arm! Arm!

Sacrifice hat.

In style.

You're no putz, after all.

>We have more hats but I don't think we have more faces or skin.

Thinking quickly, you tip your hat forward like any stylish person would do when meeting a sexy new Sack Boogie for the first time.



The corrosive gloop splashes upon the top and brim of your cap, sizzling and burbling noisomely. No cool scars today!

With the opening volley absorbed, you counterattack with your Boogie Sack!



The creature disappears into the sack's swirling vortex of otherworldly energies.

Yippee! You've captured your very first Sack Boogie!



Macrocyst: "Well done, Bingo. You're well on your way to becoming a contributing member of our dying society."



Macrocyst: "You'll find that your cortical boogiepedia has been automatically updated with the record of this capture. This will happen every time you catch a new Sack Boogie. The more different types of Sack Boogies you capture the more data you will collect, and thus the better equipped we'll be to repel their hordes."

The professor ushers you toward the doorway.

Macrocyst: "The day is still young, Bingo. You have time to begin clearing wild shadow creatures from the neighborhood and its immediate surroundings, building up your skills and ability to take on larger threats. I expect great things from you before your inevitable demise."



The door closes behind you as you step out into the fresh air and sunshine.

Well, what's your first order of business?

Well, we have that monster under our bed we could go for. Probably a safe second sack boogie to go for.

Plus we can get another hat while we're there.

Yeah lets get our bedsheet back.

oh wow! you have a "cortical boogiepedia" now! he must have installed it while you weren't looking! it's definitely not just your memory

show off your boogie to Dennis!

Yeah lets get our bedsheet back.

Maybe even patch up our hat with the bedsheet

>Wait, why'd you go on grass? You're supposed to stay on the path for a reason! Go back to the path.

oh wow! you have a "cortical boogiepedia" now! he must have installed it while you weren't looking! it's definitely not just your memory

You've had the cortical boogiepedia installed for as long as you can remember.

It only shows you Sack Boogies that you've seen or captured, and since you've only seen a few it makes for pretty light reading.

You pull it up now to check it out.



Oh, nice! When you capture one, it shows you its name and type. And its picture is in technicolor... bonus!

show off your boogie to Dennis!

First things first, gotta go tell Dennis the good news!



In a few moments you're standing under her window.

"Dennis! Heeeeey, DennisDennisDennis!"


Dennis: "What is it this time, Thirty-nine?"

"I got a new Sack Boogie, Dennis! A SLURPENT!"



Dennis: "Gross. What is that, mucus-type? I don't even want to know where the creep found something like that."

"Haha, you're such a joker! Ready for a Sack Boogie brawl?"

Dennis: "No."

"Okay, see you around!"

Well, we have that monster under our bed we could go for. Probably a safe second sack boogie to go for.

Plus we can get another hat while we're there.

Yeah lets get our bedsheet back.

You know exactly what you're going to do now that you have your own Sack Boogie. You're going to reclaim your bedsheet from the thing that lives under your bed.

And get a different hat!



As you step into The Home your Mom-and-Dad greets you warmly.

"VISUAL ANALYSIS COMPLETE, PROBABILITY 87.03% THAT INTRUDER IS ALIAS RUSTY-BINGO-CADUCEUS. QUERY: HAVE YOU SUCCESSFULLY OBTAINED A SACK BOOGIE?"

You don't have time for familial small-talk now, you're too excited!



"You betcha, MomDad!" you exclaim as you march on by. "I'm gonna go play with it in my room. See ya!"

You seal yourself into your bedroom before they can reply, then you turn your attention to your bed.



Hokay, stuff's about to get real serious. How do you want to approach this?

Pick up and throw your new creature at it.