The Machine

This is The Machine...

The air is dry and dusty. The room is dark. In the center sits the machine. It growls in the shadows. It's voice fills the space with a gruff texture. It's waiting for something. It's hungry.

I wonder what happens when I insert SeaWyrm's head amongst his candy

well turn it on dinkus

I will climb into the machine

I dare you to do it

ok now what

O.M.G. you're off the rails man.

The Buttons

They Are on The Wall.

Their plastic surfaces are dark and glassy. Wires extend from their bases Simple yellow notes record their purposes in an esoteric shorthand. Who can know what they mean?

The machine rumbles in the background.


EXTERNAL INFLUENCE DETECTED...
CONTINUITY ADVANCED...
MODIFYING SYSTEM...
NEW INFLUENCE IDENTIFIED...

Depictions (1)

I press the Red and Green buttons to make a hyper-Intelligent Communist

that'd be a bit of a superfluous transformation honestly

why the fuck is the blue button labeled RED

it redacts. You can use it to write for the SCP wiki.

Fellas, let's hammer that button on the far right. We can't tell what it actually says, and the idea of such reckless abandon is making me feel giddy. Hopefully nothing terrible will happen to the brave forum-goers who have climbed inside The Machine . . .

you could peel it and find out. it's just a sticky note.

Good point. Let's peel off the rest of that label and put it in the machine and then press that button.

As an expert on THE MACHINE I am sure no good will come of this.

*Stuffs the rest of Jacquerel into The Machine*

Meta-Jacqlarises machine'd status: 2/2

*ERROR*ERROR*ERROR*
INVALID INPUT...
NO INFLUENCE DETECTED...



TEMPORAL_MEDIUM_TEMP HAS FALLEN DRASTICALLY...
RISK OF CONTINUITY FREEZE [78%] RISING...

Depictions(1)

warm it up by sitting on it, like an egg.

Someone needs to sit on the whole factory, crushing us all under the weight of the falling debris and collapsing concrete.

Warm an egg by sitting near it, then throw it at the machine

*ERROR*ERROR*ERROR*

INVALID INPUT OVERLOAD DETECTED...
SYNTAX UNRECOGNIZED...

DEPLOYIN#$@! (^%+ )#$!

CON#$%@! IMMINE)#!

...................


ALERT, CONTINUITY OF TEMPORAL MEDIUM HAS FAILED...
REASON CITED: CONTINUITY_FREEZE_ERROR...

CONTACTING TECH SUPPORT (CONNECTING...)

Just go nuts, do whatever. Grow a little plant. Do a little dance in secret. Don't let anyone know.

Slap some hot sauce on the continuity. That might spice things up. Tabasco is healthy in any universe.