SP_NT_R_

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A word from the curator:

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Spoiler
Welcome to the Alpha Test of Spenture. This thread was a long time coming. Several years, in fact.There's a lot more story and stuff in this setting that I can probably get to share in the Alpha, but it should be still be quite a fun ride!

I will need to get one thing clarified before we get dirty...

This adventure will be heavily writing-driven. You will get a lot of text not a lot of images, sorry! If the art style of the icons look familiar, I have PaperHelmet (author of Homestesque to thank for that! Dude is a pretty cool dude and I hope to see him here again soon! :)

UPDATES INSTALLED. PLEASE >INSERT DISC AND PRESS /ENTER/

RENDER COMPLETE

>insert the cd you found in the cereal box

put in doom

((VERB IDENTIFIED: PUT))

Sure! You've been trying to bodge this buggy mess into booting for hours. You could use a smidge of soothing shooter action before you sort some more stuff out.

You squiz across your collection when something catches your eye. What could this be? It sure looks like one of your copies of Doo-oooh no.

Oh no.

Oh, no, no, no no no no no NO NO NO!



God, it's been a long time since you've seen that many floppies in one place. You just found your STASH OF DOOM FLOPPY DISKS! ((>TAKE: Y/N?)) You should probably put them back in their box and put them away before visions of multi-hour installation sequences interspersed with ejecting and re-ejecting diskettes consume your thought for the rest of the day.

You like retro gaming, but there are some elements of it that deserve being dead and buried. FOREVER.

>insert the cd you found in the cereal box

((VERB IDENTIFIED: INSERT))

Shifting the silly slices of magnetic tape aside, you grasp the package firmly. Here it is. A small CD case (well, it could be a DVD, hard to tell) slides out of the CEREAL CARTON of Capt'n Crunch it was oddly mailed to you in. Thankfully, the whole thing was shoved full of styrofoam bits and while its FESTIVE WRAPPING was scuffed, the internals look in working order.

This is the Game's 'OS' DISK, according to the manual you read two pages of, then tossed aside. It's probably stuck under all those floppies now. Kind of strange that it needs its own operating system to run, but then, you know this is no ordinary game. You've seen some pretty strange reports online about this little beastie. The translation allegedly exists on levels of shittiness rarely witnessed in the era of passable auto-translators.

Even the code itself was partially-incomplete (forcing you to bail up a close friend for solutions). You expect to be utterly disgusted by ineptitude, but you're determined to have the first real Let's Play up before anyone can beat you to the punch. You could go right ahead and stick it in to see what happens, or maybe take a closer look at the COVER. The MANUAL might be handy but it's probably not that important, who reads those anyway?

((COMMAND UNLOCKED: TYPE 'HELP' FOR ASSISTANCE. RECOMMENDED FOR PLAYERS NEW TO TEXT ADVENTURES.))

>help

Secondin'!!

>go north

>look
>i
[short for inventory]
>x me
[short for examine myself]

>take me

>help

...

M-Meta?

Uh.

Let's give it a go.

>META

>Controls

>Commands

>Check scores. Delete any high scores that beat yours.

a >hint(s) might do us good

>Commands

>META

Hmm... now a little more bass there. Then, I just need to get Sheets to pay his deb-

wait

they're watching me, aren't they? ARGH NOT YET DAMMIT IT WAS THE LAST ONE IN THE LIST FOR A REASON YOU'RE NOT MEANT TO SEE ANY OF THIS


shoo off and I'll give you help deets myself until I'm ready. Deal?

Thank god they didn't see the stuff in the background. Your secret is safe, Dirk!Hoof.

>Controls

It's pretty much the same as for any other adventure, but this is a Text Adventure, so don't expect too much in the way of maps and graphics, ok? Whenever you want to do something simply type in the action and it'll get parsed. However, there's a bit of a catch.

Every character you command has an Madness Meter and Frustration Flask. If the Meter's high, there's a higher chance of commands being ignored and if the Flask is full, GOOD LUCK BUDDY! They'll be completely uncontrollable until they've cooled down. Get a feel for each person's personality and tastes. Pander to them often enough and you should be just fine.

>Commands

To submit a command, you need to follow a basic structure most people are familiar with by now. To be parsed by this primitive engine, you need to start with a Verb. The Interpreter will then kick in and attempt to carry out the command. It's not a perfect system but it's the best I could cobble together.

>Check scores. Delete any high scores that beat yours.

Technically, this is the first player, so the leaderboard is empty right now. The points are somewhat like those from that game show where the points don't matter, was part of the game before I started work but I might find a use for them later.

Your score is 0. As a bonus for being parient and totally ignoring my screw up, I'm feeling generous. You get 10 for free! Happy

Code:

get <Next_Holiday>

!

a >hint(s) might do us good

This option will be accessible from the Help menu in the future, but right now? Here's a little hint: whenever the Help Menu is accessed, the game is paused. Unless cancelled, actions submitted before unpausing will remain.

Here's another; you haven't started character creation yet. There's two ways to start that process. Shouldn't be a problem but once that's done, things will kick off properly. When that happens, I'll be disabling the meta button, unless/until it's needed.

REMAINING OPTIONS: STATUS
PRESS [ESC] TO LEAVE HELP CONSOLE

we don't have anything to check on, might as well skip status.
> esc

>STATUS!

>Press [Esc]

>escape escape escape gotta escape cant escape

>STATUS!

Woah, That's a lot of question marks.

Esc

HELP CLOSED: MENU LOCKED

Returning to normal service, you hear a small 'ding' in your head. Whatever it was that just happened, it seems to have increased your score. Yay?

You proceed to go back to what you were doing.

>look

VERB IDENTIFIED: [L]OOK

You observe your BEDROOM. The window to the [W]est lets in a light breeze; it's rather late in the evening and your parents are probably asleep. Or would be. They're away for the weekend, a fact you're taking advantage of tomorrow.

To the [E]ast is a large wardrobe crammed full of CLOTHING, as well as your SCHOOLBAG, BOOKS and most of your CDs and DVDs.

Your BED is to the [S]outh; it's rather comfortable and warm and the sheets are a rather bright shade of green. There's a half-empty bottle of Iced Tea, with a few of its friends' carcasses littering the floor underneath. You should probably clean those up in case they start an uprising (or before mum complains again).

To the [N]orth lies your DESK and the rest of your personal belongings. Strewn across your desk are a variety of items; you may need to SEARCH through the mess to find most of your stuff. Your HEADPHONES seem obnoxiously large, though you wouldn't ever think of using anything smaller. Gotta have that open can soundstage! Other than your MONITORS, PC and FILE CABINET, it has your PHONE, KEYS, WALLET, PENCIL CASE as well as the box and manual you found earlier. An array of COMPUTER PARTS sits in a box on the rather slippery wooden floor. It got a good waxing just over a week ago, which is both a bit of a hazard and and a nuisance when the sun bounces off it into your eyes.

One of the monitors is blinking. The installation process is at 90%.

>take me

VERB IDENTIFIED: [T]AKE
Unable to see it, you search your desk successfully.

'WINDOWS ME' has been added to your inventory. You feel a sudden urge to get rid of it in an appropriate fashion. Your mind wanders off as it starts imagining all kinds of violent and destructive means of disposal.

Name: Rogue
Age: Trail rations x10
Hometown: INT
Specialties: Elf
Weakness: Chaotic Lawful
Alignment: Elf
Height: War, Death
Eyes: 1d6 piercing (crit 19-20 x3)
Hair: +6AC, 2 armor check penalty
Likes: Elf
Dislikes: 18 (+4)

>S
>Sleep
>Plugh

>Commence Character Creation.
>Y
>Set name to Bo.
>Set age to two universes.
>Set hometown to Greyhollow.
>Set secondary specialty to crafting.

>Go [n]orth, [t]ake everything on the desk!

>S

You move back towards your bed. Agh, why is it taking so long? Shitty games are generally tiny, but this thing seems to have an ungodly amount of compression. Whatever it is, it's a lot bigger than you expected. Signing, you sorta lie down and stare at the ceiling for a bit.

>Sleep

VERB IDENTIFIED: SLEEP

Yeah, you suppose you would, if you could. But you're been having a really bad time trying to sleep. It's half the reason you've been messing around with this bootleg game. Well, you assume it's a bootleg.

>Plugh

YOU ARE NOT PREPARED TO INVOKE THE POWERS OF PLUGH. (-1)

>Go [n]orth, [t]ake everything on the desk!

You cannot reach your DESK while resting on your bed! You stand up and move back over and attempt to carry everything at once. With a DEX of [ERROR: UNDEFINED] you fail miserably. Your things are now spread all over the place but luckily, nothing seems particularly damaged, except your ego.

The computer makes a strange 'ding' sound. Looks like it's finally ready.

>Commence Character Creation.

INPUT GENDER: M/F/N/O

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SpoilerOkay, here's how this is gonna plan out; I'm going to tally up all the responses and use them to set the probability of each, then roll dice to determine the results. This method will be used for some stuff, others will be more freeform. HAVE FUN!