The thread for flipping shits (and tables)

Someone left my party unhappy and now I feel guilty and terrible.

Someone left my party unhappy and now I feel guilty and terrible.

ohh noo, that's an awful feeling

i keep trying to tell myself that im just tired and im not falling into this again, but im finding it harder and harder to believe.

also its fucking hot. unseasonably hot. 26 C, in fucking april. in western washington.

my mental health hasn't been doing great, or even good

i dont want to sleep anymore and i feel like this every night and i want this fleshy prison to stop doingthis to me

my short-term memory's mostly gone, i can't get myself to work on anything without it being painful (including basic fucking things to take care of myself), i missed a class last week because i forgot it existed, i keep getting agitated really easily, i'm desperate to interact with people but also feel like i'm not really able to very well, i keep spending upwards of four hours just getting out of bed,

and i feel like i'm just getting unpleasant to even deal with

i'm just getting unpleasant to even deal with

Lies! I don't find you unpleasant to deal with, in fact, I would deem our interactions as SUPER PLEASANT.

\So their.

If I have to redo my composition on this stupid animatic ONE MORE TIME...

I've got no motivation left at all and it's not even that good so I spent all this time on something that's gonna get a mediocre mark and it just will NOT render properly. I've got like fifty files open and I'm so tired

everyone seems really really into their own comic universes and for some reason, despite making what is basically a lore book I'm really insecure and shy about sharing stuff about it and I feel really weird and unprepared. I feel like it's not good enoguh all the time and thats' a shitty feeling to have

everyone seems really really into their own comic universes and for some reason, despite making what is basically a lore book I'm really insecure and shy about sharing stuff about it and I feel really weird and unprepared. I feel like it's not good enoguh all the time and thats' a shitty feeling to have

I was talking to one of my friends about this the other day? She and another of our friends (who was also there at the time ) kickstarted their comic a year or two back now, and it was very popular among the local scene. This friend was the artist, and because she has virtually no social media presence people knew her as 'the Nothing Fits artist' for a while and would mention her as that in comic circles. Then we were published in another anthology and people knew of/about her and anyway. She was up in Auckland (biggest city in NZ, hub of basically everything here rip) and a pretty well known comic creator whom she really loves the work of was signing her copy of his book, and she said her name and he was like "wait, THE Alex McCrone?" and they had a bit of a fangirl at each other

Anyway that was quite rambly but my point was that she is terrified of sharing her work with people. We've been friends for years now; the four of us (the other member is my partner Ren) are sort of our main friend group and we meet most weeks to work on our comic stuff. She's only recently felt comfortable showing us her development art, and still won't let us read any of the writing about it. And her stuff is really well liked and widely regarded! Easily the most talented member of our little group. I wouldn't be surprised to find out that a lot of artists are like that?

Apart from that, i'm always really keen to see the little tidbits you post from your stories, Mel? It's really nice to see what sort of fun things other people come up with for stories, and i definitely know the feeling of making it seem like its really silly in your head. Believe me, everyone will love your stuff. Or at least not think its weird or undeveloped?

everyone seems really really into their own comic universes and for some reason, despite making what is basically a lore book I'm really insecure and shy about sharing stuff about it and I feel really weird and unprepared. I feel like it's not good enoguh all the time and thats' a shitty feeling to have

Aw man, I feel ya. The hardest thing in the world is actually starting, even when you have stuff finished. Like... what if they don't like it. But, y'know, sometimes you have to just go for it. I mean, if you never try, or never start, you never know if people are going to like it or not.

And if you're into it, and you like your universe, there's bound to be people who will like it as well. Especially if it has good lore. Or any lore.

I'm sure people are gonna love it. I'm rooting for ya

So I'm kind of new to the whole work/internship thing and um.

There are some days where I just don't feel like working. I feel like shit sometimes. Like, I can't force myself to do anything at work. But I've already been taking a lot of absences so I HAVE to work. How can ANYONE force themselves to work? It's beyond me. I just want to curl up and go home, and have everyone be understanding and be like "Yeah sure you can go home! Take some time off, and feel better, k?" instead of "If you take another day off that's going to have an impact on your internship grade."

maybe this is gonna be petty compared to other stuff in here, but, uh, i really wish my house had a working air conditioning/heating unit.

i mean technically the one we have works, but, apparently it's too small for the size of the house? so we can only use it to cool/heat to a small degree, because any more would make the energy bill rocket with no noticable change in indoor temp.

last year dad said we were gonna get a swamp cooler, but then, we, didn't? and just went through the entire summer with it being sweltering indoors 24/7, and i really don't want to go through it again!!

I think I'm the worst at everything in all of my classes. I don't think I'm ever going to find a job and I'm in so much debt. I'm really bad at everything I do....

so there have been two people who quit fairly recently so it's been understaffed and a co-worker asked if I could help answer the phones and deal with customers which is a reasonable fucking request that shouldn't be even a big deal to ask anyone ever but I broke down crying and I couldn't stop and I had to leave early

I hate when i make a fucking scene like this. and then when I got home I made it even worse because now I can't wear tanktops to work for a while and my co-workers keep the thermostat at way too freaking hot and I'm a dumb useless mess.

I am feeling really annoyed and it's like a wave of angry shitflipping has washed over my calm and collected barrier. People keep on asking me stupid questions in my classes and don't even read the notes!!! My Law class, rather than teaching me fucking Law, has decided to be a 'Watch Videos and Do Crosswords For Marks'! I don't WANT to talk about my future ms. guidance councillor. Please watch where you are driving, stupid locals!!! AAAAA

I have this huge goddamn 6 page essay due on monday. Thankfully, its a 3 day weekend, but HOT DAMN i hate this

its for my ethics class. i need to weigh supporting and opposing arguments to euthanasia/assisted suicide. I did a damn good presentation on it already but now............

i hate this

I fucked up the laundry this morning and now everyone in the entire universe is mad at me and I want to curl up and die

I'm having fucking nightmares about not being able to finish my demo reel on time and I'm really freaking out about it

I'm having some really weird delusional disassociation stuff happening right now and i've been essentially trapped in bed unable to move for 2 hours... I was starting to think i'd finally gone and snapped and then realised i ran out of my pills 3 days ago

At any rate i'm not doing so hot

My car is slowly but surely falling apart and I'm not emotionally prepared to deal with that financially~~~

Life was starting to get so good but then my brother had to fuck it all up and come live with us because his marriage is a failure and we'll have to deal with his bullshit for the rest of our lives.

Even though that sounds sucky, seeing a post from you brightens my day! Hi Ed! looong time, sorry there is bullshit going on.

i hat e eating

i hate having to think about food and i hate having to think about food for otherpeople