RE: Shank A Bitch 3 Day Four: WHALE DUEL: BATTLE ROYALE: THE ADVENTURE (32/71 Alive)
08-24-2014, 02:55 AM
why me :(
Shank A Bitch 3 Day Six: The Handsman Cometh (10/71 Alive)
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RE: Shank A Bitch 3 Day Four: WHALE DUEL: BATTLE ROYALE: THE ADVENTURE (32/71 Alive)
08-24-2014, 02:55 AM
why me :(
RE: Shank A Bitch 3 Day Four: WHALE DUEL: BATTLE ROYALE: THE ADVENTURE (32/71 Alive)
08-24-2014, 03:12 AM
The crowd will proceed to slowly and dramatically advance on Chwoka for the next 15 hours. Feel free to keep talking in the meantime.
RE: Shank A Bitch 3 Day Four: WHALE DUEL: BATTLE ROYALE: THE ADVENTURE (32/71 Alive)
08-24-2014, 03:31 AM
ooh okay cool.
Kill List: - Breadopocalypse - Sruixan - Everyone else
RE: Shank A Bitch 3 Day Four: WHALE DUEL: BATTLE ROYALE: THE ADVENTURE (32/71 Alive)
08-24-2014, 03:31 AM
(08-24-2014, 02:55 AM)☆ C.H.W.O.K.A ☆ Wrote: »why me :(
RE: Shank A Bitch 3 Day Four: WHALE DUEL: BATTLE ROYALE: THE ADVENTURE (32/71 Alive)
08-24-2014, 03:37 AM
(08-24-2014, 03:31 AM)amosmyn Wrote: »ooh okay cool. Slightly offended that I'm not explicitly named on that list, amosmyn
~◕ w◕~
RE: Shank A Bitch 3 Day Four: WHALE DUEL: BATTLE ROYALE: THE ADVENTURE (32/71 Alive)
08-24-2014, 04:00 AM
cool, we got to kill the feline and unicode stars guy
RE: Shank A Bitch 3 Day Four: WHALE DUEL: BATTLE ROYALE: THE ADVENTURE (32/71 Alive)
08-24-2014, 04:55 AM
Chwoka we're coming for you.
Gonna get you.
RE: Shank A Bitch 3 Day Four: WHALE DUEL: BATTLE ROYALE: THE ADVENTURE (32/71 Alive)
08-24-2014, 05:10 AM
One way, or another
RE: Shank A Bitch 3 Day Four: WHALE DUEL: BATTLE ROYALE: THE ADVENTURE (32/71 Alive)
08-24-2014, 05:10 AM
RE: Shank A Bitch 3 Day Four: WHALE DUEL: BATTLE ROYALE: THE ADVENTURE (32/71 Alive)
08-24-2014, 06:05 AM
(08-24-2014, 02:12 AM)amosmyn Wrote: » B) I'll meet you on the dancefloor Amos Maybe I won't even stop at birds Maybe I will irk an entire assortment of fauna here on Vista Paolo
RE: Shank A Bitch 3 Day Four: WHALE DUEL: BATTLE ROYALE: THE ADVENTURE (32/71 Alive)
08-24-2014, 03:42 PM
IF YOU IRK A BUG YOU'RE DONE FOR.
RE: Shank A Bitch 3 Day Four: WHALE DUEL: BATTLE ROYALE: THE ADVENTURE (32/71 Alive)
08-24-2014, 05:07 PM
Dalm you are like my best friend now.
RE: Shank A Bitch 3 Day Four: WHALE DUEL: BATTLE ROYALE: THE ADVENTURE (32/71 Alive)
08-24-2014, 05:37 PM
Is Chwoka dead yet, I stayed up all night slowly and dramatically advancing and I really could use some sleep.
There's no reason for this | Or this | Death is inevitable | You can't challenge fate | The smallest change | I'm overwhelmed
I'm serious | It makes perfect sense | Easy as ABC! | I can't even explain it | Cleaning up someone else's mess I suck | I rule | I've got it made | Really, I'm serious | This bugs me | It's all lies | I want to believe | Beauty is a curse
RE: Shank A Bitch 3 Day Four: WHALE DUEL: BATTLE ROYALE: THE ADVENTURE (32/71 Alive)
08-24-2014, 06:40 PM
You're telling me you don't know how to sleepmenace? Come on Fogel it's stuff like this that (clearly) cost you the whale duel.
RE: Shank A Bitch 3 Day Four: WHALE DUEL: BATTLE ROYALE: THE ADVENTURE (32/71 Alive)
08-24-2014, 07:01 PM
Sleep is for the weak, shanks are for the warrior
(08-24-2014, 03:42 PM)Dalmationer Wrote: »IF YOU IRK A BUG YOU'RE DONE FOR.I ain't sayin I slapped a few mosquitoes before I clocked in for the dramatic advance but nothing is sacred maybe even
RE: Shank A Bitch 3 Day Four: WHALE DUEL: BATTLE ROYALE: THE ADVENTURE (32/71 Alive)
08-24-2014, 07:24 PM
YOU WILL PAY FOR YOUR CRIMES.
RE: Shank A Bitch 3 Night Four: WHALE DUEL: PORPRESS CONFERENCE (30/71 Alive)
08-24-2014, 08:00 PM
(This post was last modified: 08-25-2014, 05:59 AM by Mirdini.)
please hold
(goddamnit Chwoka)
RE: Shank A Bitch 3 Day Four: WHALE DUEL: BATTLE ROYALE: THE ADVENTURE (32/71 Alive)
08-24-2014, 10:45 PM
(08-24-2014, 08:00 PM)Mirdini Wrote: »Please hold boo-doo-doop! we're sorry; you have reached a number that has been disconnected or is no longer in service.
RE: Shank A Bitch 3 Day Four: WHALE DUEL: BATTLE ROYALE: THE ADVENTURE (32/71 Alive)
08-24-2014, 10:46 PM
(This post was last modified: 08-24-2014, 10:54 PM by ☆ C.H.W.O.K.A ☆.)
that's right, i can post after mirdini basically told us to stop posting 'cause i'm a dead man walking. you fools. killing me has really just made invincible!
edit: i can edit my posts too. i'm unstoppable
RE: Shank A Bitch 3 Day Four: WHALE DUEL: BATTLE ROYALE: THE ADVENTURE (32/71 Alive)
08-24-2014, 10:47 PM
i don't need you punks anyway, i'll always have chwoka mafia
RE: Shank A Bitch 3 Day Four: WHALE DUEL: BATTLE ROYALE: THE ADVENTURE (32/71 Alive)
08-24-2014, 10:49 PM
(This post was last modified: 08-24-2014, 10:54 PM by ☆ C.H.W.O.K.A ☆.)
peace out
RE: Shank A Bitch 3 Night Four: WHALE DUEL: PORPRESS CONFERENCE (30/71 Alive)
08-25-2014, 05:59 AM
(This post was last modified: 08-25-2014, 05:59 AM by Mirdini.)
THE BELUGANING OF THE END
Chwoka's death is slow, painful and incredibly satisfying to everyone involved. He certainly wasn't a zombie, no sir. Curiously, the various WHALE BATTLERS seem to have vanished; presumably summoned to their yacht antechambers by COSMIC WHALE SUMMONS. Chwoka was an INSANE TELEVISION SURVIVALIST (see Airey, D2 start). He would have won if he was the LAST MAN STANDING. With the mob's hunger for a proper shanking finally sated, the doors of the hangar swing open to reveal a view of the Vista Paolo's bay, ready to stage the EVENT OF THE CETANTURY. Celestial narwhals float through the atmosphere, far above the fleet of flying humpback lighting technicians frantically doing a last few rigging checks. The orca security pack stands at attention, saluting their blue whale commander. Its fluke looms over the bay, ready to signal the beginning of the press conference with a thunderous clap. No-one knows what those sperm whales are doing. The shankers set out toward seaside, salvaged vessels of all shapes and sizes standing at the ready to transport them to the press conference to take place in the center of the bay. Shanking enmity is temporarily ignored in the face of the sheer spectacle, and so the crowd is shocked and dismayed to discover Scoffles' body washed up on the shoreline. Scoffles was a Double-Vested Bomb Shanker! (see Donut, D2 start). He was the only WHALE BATTLER to perish in the Whale Dimension. The rest (including the ghost of yd12k) await within... THE PORPRESS CONFERENCE. All shankers, living or dead find themselves on the cavernous recessed deck of the S.S. WHALENAUGHT, largest craft ever to swim the seven seas. An impressive sight indeed, rendered more impressive by the sheer amount of cetaceans present to ensure the proceedings run perfectly. With Vista Paolo's shankers the source of this battle's contestants, each of that group has received a rare invitation to experience the conference firsthand (alongside the usual WHALE JOURNALISTS). The rest of the world must watch the live-stream carried to them via current-borne plankton-fiber. Art Dalm! Miiiiiiiiiiiiiic cheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeck, miiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiic cheeeeeeeeeeeeck... ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooone twoooooooooooooooooooooooooo threeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee broooooooooooooooooooadcaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaast iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiis aaaaaaaaaaaaa gooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo~
RE: Shank A Bitch 3 Night Four: WHALE DUEL: PORPRESS CONFERENCE (30/71 Alive)
08-25-2014, 06:00 AM
(This post was last modified: 08-25-2014, 11:46 PM by Mirdini.)
Art Still Seedy Hello? Hello? Is this on? Ah, excellent. Er, we'd best... There we go. Greetings, greetings mortals! We are the Herald of the Elder Whales, and we have the honor of introducing the survivors of this age's Whale Duel. Before they take center stage, a few reminders... --------------------- VOTING GUIDELINES - Once each contestant has had their chance to speak, all non-contestants, living or dead, may vote ((in their quicktopic)) on which brave WHALE BATTLER they feel has made the strongest case for their winning the WHALE DUEL. Once the most convincing WHALE TALE has won a plurality of HEARTS AND MINDS, its bearer will be crowned the WHALE DUEL CHAMPION. - Please do take the time to examine each contestant's presented Porpoganda - you have quite some time before the voting comes to an end. - The exact WHALE FACTS each Duelist has marshaled will be revealed after a champion has been crowned. Rest assured that each piece of Porpoganda has employed them to an acceptable standard. --------------------- With that out of the way, we are honored to introduce our first challenger... yd12k!
RE: Shank A Bitch 3 Night Four: WHALE DUEL: PORPRESS CONFERENCE (30/71 Alive)
08-25-2014, 06:01 AM
(This post was last modified: 08-25-2014, 06:04 AM by Mirdini.)
yd12k's spectral form floats toward the podium in full admiral's dress, barking a sharp command at the multimedia crew.
Banners unfurl and lights dim across the deck-hall, and a stirring anthem starts up as he stands in the spotlight, grips the podium and relates the tale of how he truly won the WHALE DUEL. yd12k Wrote:Once upon a time there was a brave, valiant, handsome, clever, insanely rad superninja cyborg. His hair gleamed like polished silver, and had the same effect on the werewolves that he slaughtered before breakfast. Only evil ones though. One day, a god decided to tell him: "yd12k, you must beat the everloving crap out of 7 smelly nerds in the whale dimension". He knew this couldn't be an actual god because he'd already punched so many gods in the face that the rest steered clear, including the ones that lacked a face. Indeed it wasn't a god but Shankdini. yd12k decided to do it anyway because he had some spare time inbetween bouts of magic cardio training and psychic getting mad ripped. So he ran into the whale dimension (N dimensional running isn't that hard to him) and went to punch NERDS. yd12k finishes, gazing sternly into the distance until his crew gives him the signal that yes, they had recorded his legend for future generations to hear. A slow, noble nod is all the admiral manages as his specter flickers out of existence, returning from whence he came. The Herald wipes a tear from its eye before signalling for the hall to return to its default configurations. WHO'S NEXT? IT'S NONE OTHER THAN... Dragon Fogel!
RE: Shank A Bitch 3 Night Four: WHALE DUEL: PORPRESS CONFERENCE (30/71 Alive)
08-25-2014, 06:02 AM
(This post was last modified: 08-25-2014, 06:04 AM by Mirdini.)
Dragon Fogel slams onto the stage from above, leaping off the lofty heights of the S.S. Whalenaught's conning tower. The noise of his landing rivals the flukeslap that began the conference, and as he steps up to the podium darkness falls, a single spotlight shadowing his face. In a low voice, he begins... Dragon Fogel Wrote:The Whale Dimension was a terrifying place, even more than most mortals would imagine. What little light remains is completely extinguished as Fogel concludes his account. When they flood back on, he's vanished into the night. The only sign he'd ever been there is the chills rolling down every viewer's back. The Herald takes a minute to compose itself enough to proceed with the conference. It's the one! The only! Granolaman! |
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