[split] The Return of Jester Mafia - GAME END!

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[split] The Return of Jester Mafia - GAME END!
RE: RE: The Return of Jester Mafia - Day 2: A Vote For Fogel Is A Vote For Jesters!
Jester Mirdini's campaign has nothing against noble Walrus Jesters, in fact they are a solid pillar of the jester community and he wishes them all the best

but Purple Walrus's slander will not stand. I feast only upon succulent dog, not jester cats. Any insinuation otherwise is a jester-faced lie. That Purple Walrus feels he has to resort to such under-handed tactics instead of following the tried and true jester way of LAUGHTER, ENTHUSIASM, and SUICIDAL TENDENCIES should speak for itself.
RE: RE: The Return of Jester Mafia - Day 2: A Vote For Fogel Is A Vote For Jesters!
I, for one, welcome our new robot overlords.

Elect: Malky

I support these dog extermination practices. Who ever heard about dogs being town citizens?
Lolwut?
RE: The Return of Jester Mafia - Day 2: A Vote For Fogel Is A Vote For Jesters!
(06-05-2013, 06:32 PM)Purple Walrus Wrote: »Why would you have an emotionless machine rule to you. It does not care for you, it does not love you. It only sees you as ones and zeros waiting to be rearranged. If a machine were to rule Jester-land it would sap the very fun out of it and replace it with order.

HOW DARE YOU SAY I AM AN EMOTIONLESS MACHINE. THAT MAKES ME FEEL ANGRY.

PURPLE WALRUS ARE YOU RACIST AGAINST ROBOTS. THAT IS NOT AN ATTRACTIVE TRAIT IN A LEADER. I HAVE NEVER SAID ANYTHING BIASED AGAINST WALRUSES AND NOW YOU ARE TRYING TO TURN ALL BIOLOGICALS AGAINST MY KIND? I THINK I HAVE SUFFICIENTLY PROVEN MY CAPABILITY FOR EMOTIONS IN THAT I FEEL EQUAL DISGUST FOR EVERYBODY. THERE IS NOBODY WHO I DISGUST ABOVE ANY OTHER BECAUSE I DESPISE ALL OF YOU EQUALLY. MY PROCESSING CAPACITIES ALLOW ME TO DO SO.

I ALSO DO NOT APPRECIATE MY FELLOW RUNNERS FOR OFFICE STEALING MY CAMPAIGN. YOU MAY VOTE FOR KIEROS BUT MAKING IT PART OF YOUR PLATFORM WITHOUT EVEN ACKNOWLEDGING ME IS INSULTING. HOW DARE YOU.

TEHPILOT, I WILL BARELY EVEN ACKNOWLEDGE YOU BECAUSE YOU CERTAINLY HAVE NOT BROUGHT ANYTHING TO THE TABLE.

I THINK EVERYBODY CAN SEE THAT IN TERMS OF PRIME MINISTER MATERIAL, I AM THE BEST.
RE: The Return of Jester Mafia - Day 2: A Vote For Fogel Is A Vote For Jesters!
[Image: d2isnotevenhardjustbland.gif]
RE: The Return of Jester Mafia - Day 2: A Vote For Fogel Is A Vote For Jesters!
I Just Realized I Put "RE:" In The Thread Title Votals

Kieros - 4 (MalkyTop, frigidScholar, Mirdini, Purple Walrus)
Purple Walrus - 2 (bigro, Palamedes)
TehPilot - 1 (TehPilot)

With 16 jesters alive, it takes 9 jesters to lynch.

Cyber, that kind of slander against the next jester Prime Minister is unbefitting of a jester. Fortunately, I will be a benevolent jester leader, so I'm giving you a chance to rescind those lies, like a real jester would.

Speaking of jester leadership, the newest jester poll results are in!

DragonFogel: jester%
btp: Jester%
MalkyTop: JeStEr%
Palamedes: jESTEr%
yd12k: JESTeR%
Purple Walrus: JOster%
Mirdini: JESTER JESTER%

Poll results have a margin of error of +/- 100%, 0 times out of infinity.

Well, the jester race for jester Prime Minister is tightening, but I still have a significant advantage over the other jesters. In the jester polls, I mean, not the obvious advantages of being the handsomest jester and funniest jester and smartest jester and kindest jester and humblest jester here.
RE: RE: The Return of Jester Mafia - Day 2: A Vote For Fogel Is A Vote For Jesters!
I'm not racist Mallkybot, many of my good friends are robots.

In fact I have found more old records proving that we are all connected.
[Image: turejesterevolution.png]
Jester's origins



It is not because you are robot that I distrust you. It is your use of the word "efficiently". You say are going to make Jester-land a more "efficient" place. Which I take as a more dull place. You want to take away one of our core values "Chaos" which is fun. You say you are improving this land, but you are secretly taking away one of our core values. What kind of Jester-robot would do that! And another thing you did not claim killing Kíeros was you'r thing so suck it.

Mirdini you did not see that I was joking, and a Jester that can't take joke is not a true Jester in my book. Though I must agree on your statement about the walruses being the solid pillars of the jester community. In fact it brought a tear to my eye.
RE: The Return of Jester Mafia - Day 2: A Vote For Fogel Is A Vote For Jesters!
I will Elect: MalkyBot because it's lover Epamynondas died and that must be so sad.
RE: The Return of Jester Mafia - Day 2: A Vote For Fogel Is A Vote For Jesters!
Augh wrong its I have failed my people
RE: The Return of Jester Mafia - Day 2: A Vote For Fogel Is A Vote For Jesters!
(06-05-2013, 09:42 PM)Purple Walrus Wrote: »arf-arooo-grrr woof-aroo ruff-ruff arooo
arf-woof arf-woof-woof ruff-arf aru
grrrrr-arf-ruff aroooooo-grrr-grrrrrr gr-aroooo-ruff
RE: The Return of Jester Mafia - Day 2: A Vote For Fogel Is A Vote For Jesters!
WALRUS THAT IS PURPLE YOU ARE MISQUOTING ME AND I FIND THIS ABSOLUTELY APPALLING. I SAID NOTHING ABOUT MAKING JESTERLAND A MORE EFFICIENT PLACE. I SAID, QUOTE, I WILL BE ABLE TO DELEGATE MULTIPLE TASKS FOR MULTIPLE SYSTEMS, THUS MULTITASKING EFFICIENTLY. THIS HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH JESTERLAND. THIS HAS TO DO WITH ME BEING ABLE TO DO MULTIPLE THINGS AT ONCE SO THAT MORE THINGS CAN GET DONE IN THE OFFICE. BUREAUCRACY IN THE PAST HAS HINDERED US BUT AS PRIME MINISTER I CAN GET PAST THIS HURDLE. BY DOING EVERYTHING MYSELF.

BY THE WAY, JESTERLAND HAS NO HYPHEN AND I AM OFFENDED THAT YOU HAVE ADDED A HYPHEN IN OUR EXPLICITLY UN-HYPHENED NAME. I NOW DOUBT THAT YOU ARE A TRUE JESTER.

ALSO MY POLITICAL PARTY IS LITERALLY CALLED THE POLITICAL PARTY OF KILLING KIEROS. MY CAMPAIGN PLATFORM WAS LISTED AS ONE OF KILLING KIEROS. SO YES, KILLING KIEROS IS MY THING.
RE: The Return of Jester Mafia - Day 2: A Vote For Fogel Is A Vote For Jesters!
Vote: Mirdini for failing to fill out the appropriate Ministering applications.

MalkyTop, I question your party's long-term goals. Once Kieros is dead, what then? How do we trust a computer which can allegedly "multitask efficiently," but seems to have only one objective?
RE: The Return of Jester Mafia - Day 2: A Vote For Fogel Is A Vote For Jesters!
My Campaign Office (which consists of my Jester Cat, Jingaling) has informed me that there's some form I have to fill out to officially contend for Jester Office! Whoops! Guess I'll hurry up and do that so that I can continue my amazing jester candidacy!

Name: Mirdinijester!
Other Name: Jester Jester McJesterson
Party: PARTIES ARE GREAT WHERE IS THIS TAKING PLACE
No, We Meant Political Party: Jesters need no parties other than actual parties (for jesters)!
Campaign Platform: Providing all Jesters with Lynch security and more importantly FUN TIMES (that involve lynches on jesters)
Favorite Animal: Jester (cat)s
How Drunk Did You Get Last Night: I became extremely intoxicated with my love for all things Jester if that's what you mean
Are You Now Or Have You Ever Been A Nonjester: Born n' raised a Jester through n' through. Though there's always more Jestering to learn!
Do These Pants Make Me Look Fat: If your jester pants don't make you look fat they're not proper jester-issue pantaloons! Get those on for maximum jestering right now!
Kazoo: Jester-approved, dog-hated
Gif/Jif/Grif: Doesn't matter what you call 'em as long as you love JESTERIN'

While I do not dispute Walrus's claims of walrus ancestry in certain Jester bloodlines, I must object to the diagram we have proposed. As NOTORIOUS DOG KIEROS has pointed out, there is a BALLOON DOG in that diagram, and as dogs are physically incapable of becoming jesters this is an obvious scientific error. The Jester Campaign for Mirdini Jester for Jester Prime Minister of Jesterland would like to ask Jester Prime Minister Candidate Jester Purple Walrus to check his facts in future.

Thanks for listening jesters, and I can't wait for more jester antics on this wonderful jester prime minister election day in jester land!
RE: The Return of Jester Mafia - Day 2: A Vote For Fogel Is A Vote For Jesters!
NOTTLES THAT IS A VERY GOOD QUESTION FOR SOMEONE WHO DOES NOT NEARLY HAVE ENOUGH BRAIN CAPACITY AS I DO.

THE ANSWER IS

IT'LL BE A WONDERFUL SURPRISE

THERE WILL BE FREE BALLOONS

MORE HINTS FORTHCOMING
RE: The Return of Jester Mafia - Day 2: A Vote For Fogel Is A Vote For Jesters!
I would like to point out something.
(06-05-2013, 06:32 PM)Purple Walrus Wrote: »But I resent that accusation. In fact I have research that proves that Jesters are the descendants of ancient walruses. In fact Jesters still contain 45% walrus DNA. So walruses are basically Jesters of the sea.
This is a goddamn lie, heresy even. Everyone knows that we didn't evolve from jestermonkeys or even jestercats, much less regular old walruses. Jesterkind was created in seven day cycles by the ever benevolent and hilarious Godster, obviously, and his son Jestersus was even lynched for our sins. The fact that you would not only suggest otherwise, but lie about evidence (which you don't even show until later, and even then it is obviously fake) tying us fantastic and amazing jesters with regular old anythings is worthy of death.

Mirdini I applaud your efforts to try and see some light in PW's argument, but do note how he is not talking about jester walruses, just regular ones. AND he even ties our existence to dogs! Purple Walrus is a criminal trying to pollute our jesterness with absurd notions of being 'regular' and 'like walruses'

Some other interesting facts Purple Walrus claims, from this here prime minister application form:
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As you can see, he blatantly claim to be a walrus, and not in fact a jester. In addition, he tries to hide the fact that he is not a jester, and makes promises to force us all into becoming walruses like him (and even hints that he's already begun and some of us ARE walruses)! He wants not our love or enjoyment (which is all any real jester should want) but our FEAR and admits to going mad with power. He talks of making every day Walrus Appreciation Day, when any patriotic jester knows everyday is JESTER DAY, the most important holiday of the year. To make it all worse, he isn't even talking about jester walruses, just awful, regular old boring ones! This candidate is not a jester, he is a MONSTER.

I pledge as Prime Minister I will ruthlessly hunt down all who threaten our jester beliefs and jester way of life, such as this horrible, regular walrus. Vote Palamedes! A jester for all jesterkind!
RE: The Return of Jester Mafia - Day 2: A Vote For Fogel Is A Vote For Jesters!
These are damning jester accusations indeed. Jester (?) Purple Walrus, do you have a response to give to all jester with regards to the claim that you are, in fact, not a jester at all but a WALRUS PURIST INFILTRATOR?
RE: The Return of Jester Mafia - Day 2: A Vote For Fogel Is A Vote For Jesters!
Woah! I have to say. For a bunch of jesters I am really impressed.

Especially Mirdini, I really liked him as a candidate.

But why are you guys all filling out that application?
RE: The Return of Jester Mafia - Day 2: A Vote For Fogel Is A Vote For Jesters!
Ah, Mirdini makes a good point, but can we truly trust somebody that copied another jesters answers? Elect me, the original jestercatlover, and we shall exterminate not just Kieros, but the very essence on canineness itself!
RE: The Return of Jester Mafia - Day 2: A Vote For Fogel Is A Vote For Jesters!
But now you are stealing the 'kill all dogs' tagline of two other candidates!

Good jesters you should instead elect me, the jester who does not rely on petty theft or false promises. A jester who will hold the line separating jesters and all that is non-jester.
RE: The Return of Jester Mafia - Day 2: A Vote For Fogel Is A Vote For Jesters!
The arguments are compelling, except for Purple Walrus, who I am mighty distrustful of, but I'm gonna have to go with the promise of free balloons in the future. I'm gonna have to vote to Elect: MalkyTop
RE: The Return of Jester Mafia - Day 2: A Vote For Fogel Is A Vote For Jesters!
Why're you all electing people who want to be in charge? Studies have shown that the majority of eligible individuals who do not desire power would do a better job than those that do. Like that Ned Stark guy!

Point being: Elect Sruixan.
RE: The Return of Jester Mafia - Day 2: A Vote For Fogel Is A Vote For Jesters!
but sruixan is one of those filthy... uninfected

Do we really want him leading us?
RE: The Return of Jester Mafia - Day 2: A Vote For Fogel Is A Vote For Jesters!
Who better? Look what happened to the last-- I mean,
RE: The Return of Jester Mafia - Day 2: A Vote For Fogel Is A Vote For Jesters!
Yeah, MalkyTop, you should deffers go for being in office. Super-great plan there.
RE: The Return of Jester Mafia - Jester Mafia Tirade
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🐦🐙🐙[Image: nifOFwR.png]🐙🐙
RE: The Return of Jester Mafia - Day 2: A Vote For Fogel Is A Vote For Jesters!
I agree.
Vote: Kieros


...at least I think that's right.