Zoostuck 2

Find out what's left.

Well of course, that's only logical, if the right half of everything went missing then...

Wait a minute. It's all so obvious now.

Whatever force removed the right half of everything did so for the sake of making a terrible pun!

You're truly dealing with a deranged mind here. Whoever's responsible for this might try anything as long as they can come up with a pun for it. They might, for instance, start stealing capital letters. Or mess with the space-time continuum. Or ensure that every one of an evil wizard's belongings is some kind of pun.

In fact, you're probably working towards one of their puns right now! Maybe something about how one man's trash is another man's treasure. This mastermind is truly devious. You can only see one hope: to come up with a truly brilliant pun that they won't be able to resist, which they will be unable to enact unless they repair the damage from their previous puns.

That's a lot of work for one pile of garbage, though, so you're going to be at this for a while.

You are now a signature, and you are frustrated. You gathered an army of your fellow signatures in order to conquer this world, but now there's a massive layer of bureaucracy in between your army and total domination. That would be a mere inconvenience if it were not for the fact that half of every signature has suddenly gone missing; now you can't fill in those forms at all.

So how are you going to get this invasion underway?