ZooStuck

Originally posted on MSPA by Dragon Fogel.

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Do a little dance

Ah, yes. You've found a Dance.EXE program, which you recall requires quite a bit of system resources. If you activate it, you may be able to crash yourself and then reboot. That should reactivate network security and get the intruder out, and hopefully it will corrupt the installation in the process.

So you open the program. The planet-ship begins to dance.

You are now Zoosmell Pooplord again. Your dad is stalling on explaining what the deal was with this bet that gave you your stupid name, and Joe Eggbeater over there is flailing about with a hammer.

And up in the sky, the planet-ship is dancing all of a sudden and the cardboard fortress seems to have stopped attacking. You wonder what's up with that and completely forget about whatever it was that was going on down here.

Tattooed Lizard Guy: Find a way to stop this dancing, it's eating up way too many system resources.

You are now the tattooed lizard guy. The planet-ship is dancing, and it's making you uncomfortable. If your last clone hadn't been engineered to be immune to motion sickness, you'd have some serious issues right now.

Like the old lady, who evidently did not have her last clone engineered to be immune to motion sickness. Ew.

In any case, you need to stop this dancing so you can get back to your mission. Fortunately, all the security systems have gone down, but it's difficult to navigate a dancing planet-ship. You'll have to find the main dance controls, and you have no idea where those are.

>Tattooed Lizard Guy: Check under the pizza place.

Oh, of course, they must be under the pizza place, the one across the street from the prison you were held in and which was run by a four-armed four-legged lizardperson who made the best pizza in the universe. Where else would they be?

Well, somehow you have to make your way over there. Fortunately, you know the way well enough, but this dancing isn't going to make it easy.

You are now the four-armed four-legged pizza-making lizardperson. You have just returned to the planet-ship and brought along Bill Riff, two Sun Nuns who have just quit their jobs, Lord Huffington, and Lady Hopkins. You don't remember why they all wanted to come, but they're here anyways.

The planet-ship is moving around like the whole place is dancing, and the giant monitor visible from everywhere in the city shows that "Civilization-Destroying Game" is 99 percent finished installing. But more urgently than that, you sense that your pizzeria is in grave danger. You head there right away, and everybody else follows you, presumably because they think you know what you're doing. You don't know what could have given them that idea.

You are now at your pizza place and find the tattooed prisoner and some human female whose last clone evidently was not engineered to be immune to motion sickness. You don't know what they're up to, but you cannot allow the human female to infect your pizza with gross human germs.

So what are you going to do about it?