ZooStuck

Originally posted on MSPA by Dragon Fogel.

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> The Planetship has gained sentience, and realized that running SBURB is a bad idea.

Right, yes, you're the tattooed lizardperson and you're back on the planet-ship. Unfortunately, the global computer system seems to be aware of what you're doing and is trying to stop you.

From what you understand of Eggheimer's plan, it isn't supposed to go this way; the global computer system is supposed to help you install the game. But now you're locked out of the system, probably because you're an escaped prisoner, and you and this crazy old lady are just running from the various lethal security systems.

Oh, but it gets even worse than that.

Everybody died, some of them multiple times.

Everyone else on the planet-ship is dead. They keep getting cloned, of course, but there's a forty minute-cycle authorization delay for new clones, so none of them can access the global computer system either. And it keeps killing them again every thirty-nine minutes.

What's more, you don't even have the package; the global computer system took it away from you in order to stop you from smashing it or otherwise triggering one of the various automated scans. You have no idea where it even is. You're not even sure if you're trying to escape or find an override system or what.

Didn't Eggboy say something you barely understood about the webcomic artist's consciousness fusing with the global computer system? What happened with that?

> The creator got assault rifle'd. to death. Bro.

You are now Stupid Jerk, and you're in trouble. The webcomic artist you were beaming bad ideas at just fell over dead. You asked Sun God if he can resurrect the guy, but he says he can only do that on the sun.

Worse, you're being confronted by some guy who keeps pelvic-thrusting, some guy called Will Smith carrying an assault rifle, and an undead pterodactyl. What the hell are you supposed to do here? You're a super-hacker, not a fighter.