Re: ZooStuck (U4G)
02-13-2013, 05:10 PM
Originally posted on MSPA by Dragon Fogel.
You take a look at the adventure and... man, this is boring. This guy's never getting to Oregon. He probably doesn't even know what it is, let alone how to get there. There's no way he visited the place eight years ago.
Fortunately, as you have an entire planet's worth of computing power, you can run multiple instances of the game at once. Let's try this again and pick a better name.
...He seems to be sprawled out in the street, covered in ketchup and shouting profanities at tourists. And the police are after him.
Yeah, uh, this guy's not getting to Oregon any time soon. This looks like a Hard Mode. Maybe you'll come back to this one when you have more experience with the game. Let's try something else.
Wow, this looks stupid. That's probably what you get for picking such a dumb name. Let's try another one.
TalkyLog
Man, this cutscene is so boring. And how long is it going to be? You decide to start a new instance while you wait for it to be over.
Anyways, your latest character is Oregon Traill, a sentient traill that leads directly to Oregon. A traill, obviously, being a mystical transdimensional pathway, as everyone knows.
You can't figure out how to actually move it, or how exactly this works. What, do you have to bring the far end all the way over to Oregon? And what's it going to do when it gets there?
Yeah, this is dumb. You don't even know where the far end of the traill is anyways. Let's try again, this time with a name that isn't so stupid.
Who is this guy, exactly?
Agent1022 Wrote:Dragon Fogel.Yes, Dragon Fogel. That's a good name. You start in Edmonton, and you need to get to Oregon. But for some reason, you need to muck around making some really stupid adventure first.
You take a look at the adventure and... man, this is boring. This guy's never getting to Oregon. He probably doesn't even know what it is, let alone how to get there. There's no way he visited the place eight years ago.
Fortunately, as you have an entire planet's worth of computing power, you can run multiple instances of the game at once. Let's try this again and pick a better name.
Solaris Wrote:Florida ManYour new character is Florida Man, the world's worst superhero. What's he doing now on his quest to get to Oregon?
...He seems to be sprawled out in the street, covered in ketchup and shouting profanities at tourists. And the police are after him.
Yeah, uh, this guy's not getting to Oregon any time soon. This looks like a Hard Mode. Maybe you'll come back to this one when you have more experience with the game. Let's try something else.
Anomaly Wrote:Butts ForeverYour new character is Butts Forever and he's somewhere in New York. Apparently he's married to some weird quasi-magical thing that looks like Lindsey Lohan for reasons you don't care to know.
Wow, this looks stupid. That's probably what you get for picking such a dumb name. Let's try another one.
Professor Science Wrote:Zoosmell PooplordThat's an even dumber name! And all this kid is doing is messing around on his computer. Well, let's take a look at what he's doing.
TalkyLog
Spoiler
Man, this cutscene is so boring. And how long is it going to be? You decide to start a new instance while you wait for it to be over.
MrGuy Wrote:OREGON TRAILLYou aren't sure why you went with that name, it's even stupider than the others. Maybe you're trying to test whether dumb names always give dumb starting scenarios, yeah that's gotta be it.
Anyways, your latest character is Oregon Traill, a sentient traill that leads directly to Oregon. A traill, obviously, being a mystical transdimensional pathway, as everyone knows.
You can't figure out how to actually move it, or how exactly this works. What, do you have to bring the far end all the way over to Oregon? And what's it going to do when it gets there?
Yeah, this is dumb. You don't even know where the far end of the traill is anyways. Let's try again, this time with a name that isn't so stupid.
omegawill Wrote:Jeff WingerYour next character is Jeff Winger.
Who is this guy, exactly?
There's no reason for this | Or this | Death is inevitable | You can't challenge fate | The smallest change | I'm overwhelmed
I'm serious | It makes perfect sense | Easy as ABC! | I can't even explain it | Cleaning up someone else's mess
I suck | I rule | I've got it made | Really, I'm serious | This bugs me | It's all lies | I want to believe | Beauty is a curse
I'm serious | It makes perfect sense | Easy as ABC! | I can't even explain it | Cleaning up someone else's mess
I suck | I rule | I've got it made | Really, I'm serious | This bugs me | It's all lies | I want to believe | Beauty is a curse