The Further Pointless Adventures of Nopor Puss!

Originally posted on MSPA by Dragon Fogel.

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>charades battle

You decide to challenge your other self to charades.



You receive your phrase. Don't ask me where you got it from.



You then punch your other self in the face, because that has nothing to do with the phrase you're trying to convey.



Nopor Puss makes his guess. Of course, he makes a guess that he has no reason to think of as your phrase.



Nopor Puss is correct! He receives one point! It is added to the Point Meter, because apparently being good at charades has a point.

> Ultimate dance-off.

Since neither of you know how to dance.

What are you talking about, both of you know how to dance quite well.



Don't you remember that magnificent jig you performed some time ago when nobody was watching?



Of course, there's no reason for you to completely ignore everything you know about dancing, so that's what you do.



For instance, dancing doesn't involve scaring your partner off by throwing a shovel on them, or jumping on them if they're an inanimate object that can't possibly catch you.

Headbutting is the most pointless of combat techniques.

>Headbutt eachothers' heads.

You both come to the conclusion that a headbutt is a pointless method of attack, so you're both going to do it.



That was pointlessly painful for both of you.

Surrender. At the same time.

You both surrender. The battle is now over; there is no hostility between you.



Of course, this means there's no reason for you to start fighting again, so you do.

Nopor Puss: Pointlessly decide to not drink the potion next to you, since it could be helpful.

Good idea! You don't drink it. Nothing happens.

Nopor Puss: Pointlessly decide to try to drink an object next to you, since there isn't one.

Seeing your other self not drink something, you counter by drinking something that isn't there. This has no effect.

Nopor Puss: Smash the potion next to you on the ground into smithereens so it is unusable, then give it to your opponent, since it's pointless to give your opponent something that's useless.

You smash the potion!



Or try to. It seems the bottle is indestructible.



Well, giving your opponent something useful is more pointless than giving them something useless anyways. You hand the potion to Nopor Puss.

Nopor Puss: Punch the air five feet in front of Nopor Puss, since that should accomplish precisely squat.

You attempt to punch the air five feet in front of yourself, but since your arms aren't five feet long, this is impossible.



So of course, you keep attempting to do it.

Nopor Puss: Compose your own ode to tulips, then sing it in A minor.

Meanwhile, the other Nopor Puss starts singing the ode to tulips he has just composed.



He gets hit by his doppelganger, who is still attempting to hit the air five feet in front of himself.

Nopor Puss: Challenge Nopor Puss to a thumb war, then choose scissors as your throw since you have no reason to do that.

In response, Nopor Puss challenges Nopor Puss to a thumb war!



Nopor Puss starts off the thumb war by throwing Scissors!



And in response, Nopor Puss throws Paper.



Well, drat! Nopor Puss wins!

Whatever: Flip a coin, then ignore the result and say "..." to the nearest tree.

Whatever randomly decides to flip a coin.



It lands heads, but he doesn't pay any attention to it and talks to a tree instead.



Somehow, this draws the stranger's attention!



The stranger seems annoyed by how you're treating the tree.



And he commands it to attack you? Wow, that's really random! You should hang out with this guy more!

>Nopor Puss: Plead for your life, not that it's being threatened in any way or anything.

Since Nopor Puss currently has the upper hand (apparently), he pleads with Nopor Puss for his life.



Nopor Puss realizes that he could win a battle he would otherwise lose, which might have a point of some sort.



So he responds to the plea by surrendering and joining Nopor Puss' party!

>Nopor Puss: Enjoy a refreshing sip of lake water.

With that settled, you decide to drink some water from the oddly-colored lake.



Well. That's disappointing. It's delicious and doesn't seem to have any ill effects at all!



And suddenly, Nopor Puss has left your party without warning and Dr. N. Seyn has rejoined. You see no reason to accept this strange occurrence without question, so of course that's what you do.

What will you do next?