The Further Pointless Adventures of Nopor Puss!

Originally posted on MSPA by Dragon Fogel.

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>Buy materials to make a mech using the spare 60,000 dollars you have.

You ask Dr. N. Seyn if he has some materials for making a mech that you could buy for $60,000.



It turns out that he does!



So instead you make the offer to CrusherBot.



He doesn't seem interested in making deals.



So you give him the money and get no materials in exchange!

>Make a mech.

You make a mech with your nonexistant materials.

>Steal the world's rubber duckys using that mech.

You then order the mech to steal the world's rubber duckies.



A few minutes later, when the mech that doesn't exist doesn't come back, you conclude that it must have succeeded!

>Hold them ransom for 50,000 dollars.
>???
>Lack of profit!

You inform Dr. N. Seyn that you are holding the world's entire supply of rubber duckies for ransom and will only release them for $50,000.



He accepts your terms, and tells CrusherBot to pay the ransom!



You receive $50,000 of your own money back.

>Buy materials to make a mech by trading various things you've come across for slightly more valuable things in a tedious and protracted sidequest

You decide that the previous experience wasn't unprofitable enough, and so you opt to start a trading sequence.



Of course, since you can't leave the room, your only trading partners are a mad scientist and his psychotic robot.



So you trade with various people who aren't there, and also with yourself.



Eventually, you succeed in making $40,000, after losing all of the $50,000 you started with.



You then offer the money to CrusherBot for materials again, with similar results to last time.

>Make a mech out of materials other than the ones you just bought, leaving those aside.

You now gather up your new nonexistent materials.



You then ignore them, and instead build a mech out of the dragon statue that you converted into a mechanical bull, and the first mech that you built, which still hasn't returned.



In other words, this mech doesn't exist either.

>Steal the world's rubber duckys using that mech, but don't steal or attack any of the factories used for making more

You order your new nonexistent mech to steal the world's rubber duckies, but tell it to leave all rubber duck factories alone.

>Hold them ransom for less money than you made trading, but don't notify anyone your ransom demands or even that you have them.
>???
>Lack of profit!

You then decide that you won't tell anybody that you are holding the world's rubber duckies ransom for $30,000. In fact, you strike up a conversation with Dr. N. Seyn specifically so that you can not mention this.



However, a short way into your conversation, the doctor remembers that he was attacking you!

do both for no reason.

You already did. It would be pointless to do both sequences of events again simultaneously.



So you set to work on doing so immediately.



After the resulting confusing series of events, CrusherBot is enraged!



CrusherBot's anger is starting to overload its cooling systems!



CrusherBot explodes spectacularly! Unfortunately, you are not hit by any of the shrapnel.



Dr. N. Seyn is pleased, as CrusherBot's explosive mechanism hasn't been working properly lately.



In gratitude, Dr. N. Seyn joins your party!