The Further Pointless Adventures of Nopor Puss!

Originally posted on MSPA by Dragon Fogel.

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Call Dragon Fogel "Dragon" again. Since it did nothing benificial the first time, it's even more pointless to do it again.

The fish suddenly vanishes.



The same fish then hits you on the head again.

Assume that the beast is your worshipper. Obviously this means you have to worship him. But do so while completly ignoring him, as taking any notice of him would have a point. And the longer you ignore him, the more time he's wasting, and it's pointless to have him waste time.

Having no reason to assume the Lesser Paradox Beast is your worshipper, you do.



You proceed to worship him without paying any attention to him. Instead, you stare at the fish.

Add spaces to the point meter, since doing so would be pointless, as you're trying to not do that.

You designed the Point Meter to update itself automatically, and to be tamper-proof.



Of course, since you designed the device, you know how to disable the security systems. You enter your password and are granted access. You can now manipulate the Point Meter as you see fit.



Which means it would be pointless to do nothing to it. In addition, you change the password to a completely random string of characters that you're sure you will never remember.

Shout the word "Pointless" repeatedly. For no reason at all, of course.

You do. Nothing happens. Success!

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SpoilerYes, that shouting sprite is horrible and you are perfectly justified in mocking me for it.

> Ride fish towards the right

What a pointless idea! After all, you could easily walk there!



The fish doesn't move at all. This is just as pointless as you'd hoped!

Shout the word "Bottom"

Since you seem to be at the bottom of a pit, you worry that this may be giving away too much information to be truly pointless.



On the other hand, the Lesser Paradox Beast probably knows that much already. So you can shout at it and still be pointless!



You go up to the Lesser Paradox beast and shout at the top of your lungs.



The Lesser Paradox Beast is not pleased. It informs you that you are being fined for causing a minor logical paradox. It then proceeds to write up an additional fine for wasting its time. The fines come to $10.35 altogether.

>Flail arms around while making fart noises.

You can't see how this will help you either pay your fines or convince the Beast to waive them, so you do. This looks nothing like shouting at the top of your lungs, although it might if somebody was only looking at the process for a fraction of a second.



The Lesser Paradox Beast is not entertained. Success!

First, become nihilist. Then enjoy life.

You think about this. You're fairly sure becoming a nihilist doesn't require any sort of conversion ceremonies.



That means you'll have to find somebody to perform one for you before you can become a nihilist!



You then decide to stop enjoying life until after you become a nihilist.



But doing so is pointless, and you can't help but enjoy doing pointless things. So you're happy again!

Because you don't remember any followers, it would be pointless to ask them for help!

What an excellent idea! You yell out to ask your followers to help you pay your fine and escape from Hell.



A strange device suddenly appears.



Somebody walks out of the device.



The strange person goes over to the Lesser Paradox Beast and pays it $10.35 on your behalf.



The Lesser Paradox Beast is satisfied, and leaves.



Then your strange benefactor goes back into the device.



Worried, you check your Point Meter. It seems to have gone up by one!



You'd better stop this stranger before he helps you escape from Hell! But how?

Pretend to be Mariah Carey.

While it would be pointless to do that, since you have no idea who Mariah Carey is or how she acts, that might actually convince the stranger you aren't who he wants to help. A more pointless approach is in order.