Consistency

is this a fever dream

That would explain why everything seems so off.

Well, you're not going to stand for this! You requested a flu dream, not a fever dream! You're going to have to call the dream operators and complain.

But you haven't seen a phone in this dream anywhere. And you definitely don't think you're going to find one in this pit of dream-quicksand you're sinking into.

Oh, right. You should probably deal with that before you go looking for a phone. But how are you going to get out?

When life gives you lemons, reverse-engineer it into a lime

Yes, that's the perfect slogan for your latest business venture, FruitCo. You're sure the focus groups will love it.

So now that you've got the marketing worked out, picked out the executive committee, and sent in all the paperwork to get incorporated, there's only one thing left to do.

You need to figure out how exactly you're going to get some fruit so you can start selling it. Hopefully in a way that doesn't require any additional money, because you already spent it all.

What's the plan?

Code:

~()''''
~HH~~~"
~HH~HHn
@<""HHu
~HH''''
~HH'~~~
~()'~~~

You input the pattern you found on that strange microchip. The alien artifact lights up and starts making a weird humming sound.

Then it hovers a few feet off the ground.

Well, okay, you did something, but you're not sure how this is going to help you fight off the invasion fleet. Maybe you're still missing something important about this artifact.

But what could that be?