Zoostuck 3

King Will Smith of Denmark

Ah. Of course.

You aren't actually sure if hating yourself is a requirement of the procedure, but it's better to be safe. Unfortunately, you're restrained from truly hating yourself because you believe your harsh actions are necessary, and that the harm you're causing others is not what you truly desire.

In short, you have in many ways resigned yourself to your fate of being the single most despised person in the universe. Perhaps if you could bring yourself to believe there was another way, a better way, you could hate yourself for pursuing this one.

But you weren't actually thinking about yourself when you reviewed your universal hatred status. You were picking up someone else who, for whatever strange reason, doesn't hate you.

chwoka

And you've realized why you're having trouble locating them. It's not a person - it's the Chwoka Has Won Officially, Kid, Ahahahahahahahahahaha corporation, which has evidently attained sentience.

And it doesn't hate you. You'll have to earn its hatred. Preferably in a way that earns your own hatred at the same time, just to be sure.

So how are you going to do that and complete your goal of attaining universal hatred?