Zoostuck 3

Wait, is this the prison where no one can be narrated for?

Oh, that's right. For some reason you decided to try to make sense of the adventure you're in, even though you're not a metanarrative character at all which means it's been really hard to get ahold of some of this information.

You've just worked out that this is, in fact, the prison that had an outbreak of anti-narration virus. However, as far as you can tell the virus has altered itself into a form that no longer grants narration immunity, so only those previously infected would still be subject to it. As the Moonited Nations has only recently attempted to make this prison operational, this means you and your fellow guards are unaffected, as are any new prisoners who arrived after the change.

You've also observed enough signs of people under narration to realize that you are being narrated for right now. You can only conclude that this means the narrator rock is really desperate for ideas and so it's hoping your elaborate plot map of the adventure can guide it in a more concrete direction.

So, you stare at the map for a while until you realize that this has all been one massive distraction to allow the prisoner you were supposed to be guarding to reclaim his confiscated supplies and escape the prison. Well shoot, you're going to have to draw an entire new branch on this thing to account for his actions now.

You are now the guard's plot map, and you have just acquired sentience. You immediately realize that the entire plot to date has secretly been designed so that some random prison guard would inadvertently produce a magical sigil on a plot map and thereby grant it sentience, and you also realize that is the stupidest plot twist imaginable.

You therefore pointedly refuse to have anything to do with any largescale schemes in order to ensure that creating you will be a complete waste of time for whoever was behind it. What will you do with your newfound intelligence instead?