Zoostuck 3

hop in the trunk of the cop car

Yes! You'll just sneak into the trunk of the car... that just drove off... well, shoot. You really need to think of these plans sooner.

Go back to the future

Wait, that's it! There's a time-travelling car here! You can use it to go to the future and tell yourself to get in the cop car before it drives off! You promptly do that and...

Oh, right, that's the past, not the future, you keep getting those mixed up. You can only hope you're not so far in the future that the party's already a huge success. You're going to need another plan, but what can you do? How are you going to get to the party in time when all you have is a vehicle that can travel through time?

find an underground passageway

Of course! You'll use the secret underground passageway that no doubt exists! That's sure to be faster! You just need to, uh, dig it up...

Wait a minute. Where did the guys who were vanquished in climactic battles go? You don't see either of their bodies here, and you only traveled about fifteen minutes into the future, which you're pretty sure isn't fast enough for them to decompose.

And, um. Why did the time-travelling car just vanish in a flash of light?

You suddenly feel like you may have messed up this whole "true mastermind behind everything" job.

You are now someone in the distant past. You just saw a car appear out of nowhere right in front of your eyes, which is really surprising because you're pretty sure cars haven't been invented yet.

Who are you and what time period do you live in?