You are about to start your exciting new job

You are about to start your exciting new job.

You will be the person who pulls the staples out of the recycling!

What's your name? Do you have a backstory?

SpoilerShow

The last time I tried to make a forum adventure I tried to combine all the suggestions I got and it all got too random. So this time I'll try to just use one suggestion per update.

best as you can discern you were called forth into existence for the express purpose of this job and that is honestly kind of alarming

> Your name is Albert Eggs, a very peculiar surname for a peculiar person who is descended from a peculiar family of peculiar careerists. Your career was determined in your toddlerhood while rustling through an office bin of your father, who's job was to pretend to be a noisy bee pestering all these stick in the mud office clerks. You have never regretted a single thing in your life since that fateful day.

best as you can discern you were called forth into existence for the express purpose of this job and that is honestly kind of alarming

seconded

best as you can discern you were called forth into existence for the express purpose of this job and that is honestly kind of alarming

No ... you don't have a name or any backstory you can think of. You know that you are going to be the person who pulls the staples out of the recycling, and that is about it.

You wonder if you'll find any answers in the Recycling Center.

***

You walk into the Recycling Center. A man is sitting behind a desk. He is engrossed in a book, but you can't read or understand any of the symbols on the cover.

"Excuse me ..." you ask.

He raises his eyes from his book. He doesn't look very interested in you.

"I have a new job here, I will be pulling the staples out of the recycling ..." you say.

"What's your name?" he asks.

$%@#. You don't have a name. What do you tell him?

Will B.

Hopefully he won't ask what the B stands for, you haven't thought that far ahead.

Blurt out a name that by horrible coincidence is the guy's name

Will B.

Hopefully he won't ask what the B stands for, you haven't thought that far ahead.

"Will B" you say.

"Great." he says. He pulls out another book from inside his desk, opens it to some page or other, and writes in it. Then he sticks his tongue out of the side of his mouth for about a second.

"Okay," he says. "You go down the right hallway, open door 10, go up the stairs to the third floor, and go to door 367. There you should find your superior. I'm not sure who it would be right now."

Any more questions or time to head to work?

What do I do if I eat a staple by accident?

Head on up.

What will happen if a staple ends up in my mouth by accident and I swallow on purpose?

What do I do if I eat a staple by accident?

What will happen if a staple ends up in my mouth by accident and I swallow on purpose?

uh, this is how we're supposed to remove the staples! don't ask these questions, don't let them know we haven't read the job description, just get to chewin'

What do I do if I eat a staple by accident?

What will happen if a staple ends up in my mouth by accident and I swallow on purpose?

uh, this is how we're supposed to remove the staples! don't ask these questions, don't let them know we haven't read the job description, just get to chewin'

You're about to head on up to the room he told you to go to, but the voices in your head won't keep quiet.

"What do I do if I eat a staple by accident? Or - even worse - what if one ends up in my mouth by accident, and I swallow it on purpose?"

You stand there mulling this over. The guy behind the desk has gone back to his book and doesn't seem to be paying attention.

You start gathering up the courage to ask him these questions, but then more doubts come to you.

"What if this is how we're supposed to remove the staples? What if it's in the job description, and he'll know I haven't read it if I ash him?"

You'd better not say anything.

You walk out of the room.

***

You follow the directions he gave you and arrive at door 367. You open it gingerly. You see a large white room, containing an even larger stack of paper. There is no one else there.

What do you do?

>Look for trash. We have staples to remove.
>If trash is not found, create trash. Go to step one.

>Look for trash. We have staples to remove.
>If trash is not found, create trash. Go to step one.

You decide to start looking through the stack of paper for staples. You are correct. Many of the papers are groups of pieces of paper stapled together. You remove these staples and put them on the floor beside you. You put the sheets of paper that you are sure have no staples in them in another stack.

A few hours later, you are feeling quite hungry. No one has come to check on you yet. What will you do?

YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO EAT THE STAPLES AND NOW YOU'VE GOTTA GORGE, GREAT GOING

>Move staples into a corner I guess. They never actually said what you were supposed to do after you take out the staples. Unless you have an inventory, in which case load up on staples.
>Go find another room, probably more staples to find elsewhere.

Perhaps your superior is very small and quiet.

Perhaps your superior is very small and quiet.

You look around the room for a possible small and quiet superior. You don't find a person, but you do find a potted plant you didn't know was there. It doesn't appear to be able to talk though.

YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO EAT THE STAPLES AND NOW YOU'VE GOTTA GORGE, GREAT GOING

Maybe you were supposed to eat the staples all along? You look at the pile of staples, willing yourself to feel hungry for them. You just can't, though. You hope that the Recycling Center offers other food, because eating those would be an unpleasant experience.

>Move staples into a corner I guess. They never actually said what you were supposed to do after you take out the staples. Unless you have an inventory, in which case load up on staples.
>Go find another room, probably more staples to find elsewhere.

You slide your pile of staples into a corner and leave the room. You are back in the hallway.

Go right, go left, open doors .... ?

>Screws and pins are kind of like staples, and doors are kind of like papers. Remove the screws and/or pins from the door hinges.