Ask Niall! "Niadvice" isn't really that catchy, is it?

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Yes I know NotASenator did this first go away!

Hi everyone. One of my childhood fantasies was that I had always wanted to be an Advice Columnist in some classy newspaper (preferably in the 1920s). In adulthood, this has translated into a minor fetish where I compulsively help others when I see them in a state of unrest, to such an extent where I'll rather solve other's problems than my own. But enough about me. I wanna hear about you.

Ask me anything. From the flippant to the innocuous to the residually weighted. I will answer to the best of my ability, unless I'm drunk, at which point I will start a new thread and drunk-post separate responses there*.

Go ahead. I don't bite. This isn't the Biting Thread**.

*I'm kidding. My metabolism is that of a herd of oxen. Drunk Niall is pretty similar of that to Sober Niall, except less legal to drive and slightly more charming (I think I'm more charming anyway).The More You Know.
**Do we have a Biting Thread yet?

I've decided to become a supervillain because of all this roadwork going on outside my house. Do you have any suggestions for a costume?

Is it worth it to make a one-off "Biting Thread" with no purpose other than a cheap joke, and possibly pictures of chain chomps, piranhas, puppies, etc.?

How can i stop being so lazy?

I've decided to become a supervillain because of all this roadwork going on outside my house. Do you have any suggestions for a costume?

Yes, but it's really all dependent on what you hope to accomplish. If you want to be a Knight Templar Supervillain, bent on restoring (literal) peace to your neighborhood then I'd suggest white linen, and lots of it. Unfortunately, the obvious choice for a masked, linen costume is taken, so here's something I Google searched:

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OK, so it's not white, but it's beige. That's, like, 10 times better for someone who thinks they're doing good. Beige is like the gun of colours, and when I say gun, I mean it in the Final Fantasy context, being that it's completely harmless (It's a gun, yet it does bugger-all damage! Did you mistake your gunpowder for laundry powder before you went out adventuring? I think you did, ridiculously biologically unproportional character I will conveniently "forget" to Cure out of spite. You would do more damage if you hit the monster with the butt of your gun. You would do more damage if you hit the monster with your unproportional butt!)
That being said, I doubt you're in the right state of mind the purge the world of those you deem to be "evil". No, I suspect you're more in a state of being Driven To Madness, and thus our options can be more suitably extravagant. Let's face it, who doesn't love extravagance? Well, studio accountants coping with the budget for a movie set designed by Wheat, but that's neither here nor there (nor relevant Niall).
Here's my first returned google result suggestion. Take inspiration from male ice skaters. Yes, I know it sounds crazy but, with sensibility and tact, you can find a decent outfit. For instance:

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Classy, scary and will suit most body types. Just get rid of those shoulder... ferrets. Hey, that pose could even be your signature pose (unless you want to be nicknamed "The Lame Seagull", I wouldn't advise it). Just make sure you use your common sense when selecting outfits from ice skaters, lest you end up like Takahiko Kozuka:

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We laugh because it forwards humanity by reminding us not to make the same mistakes as those we laugh at. Collaborative evolution, if you will. So maybe a tight fitting outfit is not your thing? Sure, I have you covered. May I point you toward Coolio, or whatever his name is from Assassin's Creed:

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Intimidating, yet contemporary. I you wear it, the role-reversal from anti-hero to anti-villain is subtle unless some tactless idiot happens to point it out and spoil it for everyone. As a bonus, if you wear this you won't have attention attracted to you as you would with the more traditional outfits.
And, if complexity isn't your thing, you can always stop over-thinking it and go the Classic Man approach:

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Granted, you will have an upper hand if you have a... 1... 2... ...an 18-pack. Is that even physically possible?
Just remember the Golden Rule, conveniently stolen from the only good line in the movie Megamind: The difference between a Villain and a Supervillain...

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...is style.

This is Niall signing off, wishing you a good night and happy advice.

Is it worth it to make a one-off "Biting Thread" with no purpose other than a cheap joke, and possibly pictures of chain chomps, piranhas, puppies, etc.?

Well, it's always a context relevant situation, isn't it? I mean, we do already have one single-serving joke thread on the forums, so the question lies in whether we want another. Part of the reason for establishing Eagle Time may have been (and don't quote me on this) to have a place where a higher standard of thread would adorn the fine satin that is this forum (cloth analogy!). Flooding the forum with threads of this type might seem counter intuitive to that goal.
However, my opinion is that threads like these provide the lowest common denominator in forum participation. They're the most accessible and require the least effort to contribute a post to. If you don't feel like you have the energy to make an intelligent and thoughtful post on any given day, you've got this option as a way to still feel involved in this community.
Also, this is very much the beginning of Eagle Time. I feel like I can speak for everyone when I say that we're not entirely sure what Eagle Time will become in the future, or exactly what we'd like it to be at the present time. This period is very much one of R'n'D, so I'd suggest do just that. If it turns out nobody's receptive to it, you've learnt something. If a mod comes through and locks a thread, you've learned something too. If it's a resounding success, so much that it has a quicker post rate that Prequel, there's a third thing you may learn.
I'd say go for. It will also give me a little ego boost, because The Biting Thread was my conception (I'm so vain, I bet I think this post is about me, don't I? Don't I?). Do it. We as a community only have knowledge to gain from it.

This is Niall signing off, wishing you a good night and happy advice.

Well that's definitely some good advice. And you totally make a good point in your last post.

And that's all great and everything but... how can i stop being so freakin' lazy all the time and stop procrastinating? Got any good tips for me?

How can i stop being so lazy?

Aaah, this is a tricky one.

Well, firstly you can make this into a competition. As of this post, we will have both posted 35 times. Are you thinking what I'm thinking? Because I am! I challenge you to a forum off! May the best poster win!


Outside of the obligatory joke paragraph, the answer to stop being lazy is going to take a little more in depth discussion than just a mere 100 words. But first:

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How can i stop being so lazy?

Hmm yes, this is a terrible case of laziness. I recommend 30 milligrams of Shift Key.

Aaaright, let's do this:

As somebody who suffers from a tendency to procrastinate, I can tell you that there's no easy answer for this one. Procrastination comes about as a lack of motivation coupled with the desire to take action. Two conflicting mindsets that seemingly cannot exist in the state of one's mind. Well, they can quite easily. The biggest step to overcoming procrastination and doing what you want to do is you need to assess how strong both of these desires are. Because they are both linked to the same action we cannot assess each other individually.

To get up and going, you're going to need to know why you are not motivated to do what you want. What is it that's holding you back? I assume it's not a case of time or accessibility, because if that was the case then you wouldn't say you were lazy, so much as busy. So it's not time, despite what you brain might try to justify to yourself when you don't accomplish what you set out to do* (you can always make time for hobbies if you manage your time efficiently. Again, it's down to motivation to do so). In most to all cases, the main cause of not being motivated to do something is some sort of fear, and this is the part where this advice column is gonna work for you or not.

When ascertaining what it is that make you non-motivated, the first response will be "bluh bluh, I'm a lazy, blobbly, blob". Stop. That kind of self depreciation won't get you anywhere�. Next, you need to get over the phase of "well I've thought and thought about it and I still don't know" because in nearly all cases, you will know if you put your mind to thinking about it�. Basically, you need to not be critical of yourself, but you need to be honest. Don't try and pick apart yourself. Just make a statement about yourself and evaluate its truthfulness in the scheme of yourself. Rinse, repeat.

The point you need to reach is that of "I procrastinate because I don't want to___" or "I procrastinate because I'm afraid of___". It could be many things. Success. Failure. Trying. Having people being critical of your efforts. That you won't have the staying power. It could be multiple things. I do believe that at the heart of all procrastination lies a fear, and in order to understand why you do so, you need to know what that fear is.

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Here's a musical interlude relative to our discussion. Does it bear truth for you?

I'll use myself as an example:

"I procrastinate because I'm afraid that if I try to achieve my potential, I won't reach the level of expectation I've set my ideal self at." In other words, "I'm afraid if I try, I won't be amazing." There are several basic problems with my fear. Firstly, I need to accept the fact that nobody who begins something is amazing at it. You need to practice at something to become good at it, even if that means working hard at it. While I am currently telling myself that of course I will need to practice at something to be good at it, my fear of immediate failure prevents me from taking the first step on the basis that my first attempt will probably be not polished at whatever I do. Secondly, I've set an unreasonable expectation for myself, but more than that, I've set an idealistic expectation for myself. "Amazing" is such a high standard in my eyes it equates to "Nation-famous in my chosen field". What I need to do is to give myself a reasonable expectation for myself. Instead of "Top 0.005 percent" I should be aiming for a goal I am be comfortable with, yet within the bounds of tangibility, like "being able to support myself off the occupation I've chosen" (musician, for instance). Finally, I've placed myself in a position of a Schrödinger's Cat situation. I'm too afraid that if I try and fail, thus becoming a failure in my eyes, that I'll prevent myself from doing anything that might reveal if I have the needed potential or not. People say "It is better to have loved and lost than never loved at all" and while this is true for love, being in the grounds of emotionally growing etc., it's not true for every person in other aspects of their life. Some people would prefer to keep that box closed and go on believing that they perhaps do have the talent without ever actually succeeding instead of opening the box and knowing. The truth is, not everybody's cat is alive, and not everybody wants to know either. Still, I believe that potential isn't a "you have it or you don't" more of a "varying degrees of success", so , in my opinion, most cats are just sick and can be nursed back to health�.

Aaaarrrggghhhhhokay, where are we? Symptoms, check! Treatment, god dammit, haven't even begun. Luckily, this is going to be the shortest part of my god damn essay (shame there isn't a Grand Advisor Battle, eh?â?¡). OK, what to do. Now that you've started thinking, before you even act, catch yourself out at your own game. When you tell yourself to do something then don't do that. Catch that voice out and recognise what it's saying and how it's manipulating you. After that, keep working on understanding yourself. If you put an expectation on yourself that you'll do something, make sure you really want that expectation there. If not, know why. Knowing is half the battle. The other half is simply the actions you take, and there's nothing ever truly stopping yourself from doing something. You can pick up that pen and spend hours writing/drawing/stabbing Shank A Bitch contestants if you so choose right now. There's nothing stopping you really. Remember that.

*Your brain will tell yourself that you are too busy to be, say, drawing a picture or composing a ditty (macramé dragons, whatever floats your boat). Instead, it will find excuses as to why you don't have enough time or you should be doing something else. Fight this! If you can say you have reasonable (not great, just reasonable) time management skills then this argument won't be able to hold water in your mind and you'll be able to fight it easier. Don't have good time management skills? Get some! It doesn't take that much effort to sit down and write out what you do in a day and how long it takes. I've done it. It's a great way to see if you're being unreasonable with the commitments you want to make for yourself.
�I could even go so far to state that it's a defense mechanism that is used as a shield to the emotional unrest that comes with facing up to the real issue at work and it can be used as an excuse/barrier to actually accomplishing goals, but that's another discussion for another time.
�Again, defense mechanism. If you keep telling yourself you don't know why you act this way, maybe you're not ready to face up to your habits? It's something you'll need to consider.
â? 

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â?¡The winner would have the gift of the GAB.

I don't know how much of this is relevant to you, or if any of it is helpful. It could be I just revealed the inner workings of my mind and this has absolutely no relevance to you at all. Still, I hope you find some nugget in that clusterfuck I just wrote. When I write, I can say something well, or say everything I want to. There's little middle ground. Well, I hope this helps a person or two, especially you Ed.

This is Niall signing off, wishing you a good night and happy advice.

How do I improve my confidence in my drawing and writing skills so I don't curl up into a ball of despondency any time I'm actually required to use them?

How do I improve my confidence in my drawing and writing skills so I don't curl up into a ball of despondency any time I'm actually required to use them?

Firstly, be aware of that little voice that tells yourself that you're no good and make an attempt to counter its arguments. Whenever you hear that voice in your head, counter it and tell it that it's being overly critical and irrational. Simply being aware of that voice, the one that uses infinitive and hyperbolic adjectives like "horrible", "sucks", "bad", etc., will take it from your subconscious and bring it to the forefront of your consciousness, which will be enough to interrupt the thought pattern and prevent you from internalising your own bad criticism.

Next, attempt to ascertain what it is about a piece of artwork you don't like. No art ever just "sucks". Perhaps the phrasing in a sentence is inconsistent with the rest of the paragraph or the line-work in a drawing has differing weights. You may agree with that voice that your drawing/writing needs work, but the difference between constructive criticism and that voice is that the voice doesn't have a sense of perspective. If you have negative feelings towards a piece of work that voice will personify your feelings without having an accurate gauge of the talent in said piece. When you have deduced what is about your art that you think needs improving, you'll be able to approach your art from a budding artist's view: "This is what I need to work on to improve my skill." It becomes less a case of viewing yourself and your art in the moment here and now, but viewing yourself as an improving artist. Make a list. Writing down things confirms things in your brain and brings it to your consciousness. When you write this list, make sure to also write down a couple of things you were happy with in that work, for balance.

Never take your criticism personally. I see a lot of people who's voice says things like "This drawing isn't very good, so I'm not a good person." Even when people give themselves constructive criticism, they'll sometimes translate their skill as an artist to their value of self-worth as a person. If you find yourself saying things like "I suck" or "I'm not very good" then you're making sweeping statements about yourself that will affect your general confidence overall when it comes to artistic ability. If you sit down to draw/write and feel crippled into inaction by self-doubt before you've even done anything, it's possible you are doing this. If so, try to separate your self-worth from your artistic ability. "I am not doing a good job" does not equate to "I am a worthless person". This sounds like such an obvious thing to say that it seems silly I need to say it, but you'd be surprised to find that you are doing it without even realising.

Finally, let's do something that isn't a mental activity. Let's do something tangible to kick your brain into gear. I'd like you to do a Retroactive. After an artist has been producing work for a period of time, they start to feel like they stagnate without realising they continue to improve in their work. So here's what I want you to do:

• Pick a piece of work you drew/wrote a year or two ago. A character study, a still life, whatever.
  Attempt to replicate that work now. The same pose, the same expression, the same scene.
  Don't attempt to just create a perfect copy of this work. Create this work again with the skill you have now. Here's an example. You can find a whole group on DeviantArt based on this concept here.
  Compare the pieces.
  Congratulate yourself. Go ahead say a bunch of nice things about yourself. You've earned it!
  List the things you like and the things you think you've improved on. Don't be modest.
  Go as far as to speculate what next year's work will look like if you keep working hard on your art. This will give you cause to continue practicing and growing.[/list:u]
  
  Hopefully, this advice works for you. If it doesn't, please tell me. Let me know what angle I should have taken with this advice instead. I'd love to know how to improve. Post some feedback on the thread or send me a PM. You're not the only one looking to extend their talents after all.
  
  This is Niall signing off, wishing you a good night and happy advice.
  
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  Do you think my sign-off line is too silly. "Happy Advice" is purposefully written to be bad grammar, but I'm not sure if I want to keep it if I'm answering serious questions. Let me know. (These are the things I worry about :eyeroll:)

Hey Niall, i read your post as soon as you posted it. But guess what? haha, i was procrastinating instead of writing a response. Mostly because i wanted to thank you properly and write a bunch of stuff about how cool your post was and how much i related to it and that i wanted to follow your tips but WHOAH PROCRASTINATION TIMES.

So i guess i'll just say thanks a lot for taking the time to write that. I'll try my best to stop procrastinating.

Niall, how do i avoid being a complete sad piece of shit whenever i fail at something or break something?

Also how do i speak words with people?

~Awaiting Answers, Sorrowful and Silent

Solaris, I just want to say that I've been sick this past week and dueto that have had limited internet access. This is the first time I've seen your question and I just wanted to say that I haven't been ignoring it. I'll hopefully get around to answering it tomorrow if all goes well (and I don't have another relapse). Stay well. Say hi to everyone on IRC for me (I miss you all). See you soon (I hope).
~Niall