incomprehendia

Be the guy with the life threatening head wound.

You are now that guy!

Your name is...on a need to know basis.

You are in a location which is completely unknown to you and you have no idea how you got here, suddenly you were just in this dank corridor.

Of course, you are not exactly new to the strange and bizarre. You swear to god you must be cursed or something. Or maybe hallucinating from the bullet in your head. Either/or.

You have the strangest feeling of being the eldest. You have no idea why.

What do you do?

>_

>Search for the non-eldests.

> Look out the window!

Alternatively,

> Explore everywhere.

>Examine your weapon more closely.

>Explore corridor. Explorridor.

Check behind you for loot. Aw yeah completionism

> Is that window full of static?

> Fail to comprehend.

>Search for the non-eldests.

Yes well, you guess a feeling like that would also imply that you're not on your own here. Whether the're on your side or not, you'll soon find out.

>Examine your weapon more closely.

At least you're not unarmed, you got your trusty Assault Rifle, fully loaded. You seem to recall having cooler weapons that this, like a makeshift extendo spear and a magic grenade launcher. Ah well, you'll live.

Maybe.

> Look out the window!

Alternatively,

> Explore everywhere.

You take a look out of the window.



Well then, this isn't pretty. It would seem the entire sky is dominated with static, with what seems like hyper-violent ocean of red static lapping at the bottom. You would describe it as uncomprehending but you are in the business of shooting things, not pseudo title drops, so you'll settle for creepy.

You think you can make something out in the distance...



What...what is that?



Good question.

ARBLAGHBLUH?!

>_

> AGHBLAHBLUH

>Shoot

EVERYTHING

Lou: Clearly some kind of crime has been committed here. Investigate it.

Everyone: Be on the lookout for Aether Dragons.

>Quick! Run carelessly into the next room! It's your only hope!

> AGHBLAHBLUH

>Shoot

EVERYTHING

>Quick! Run carelessly into the next room! It's your only hope!

Oh for goodness sake.

Lou: Clearly some kind of crime has been committed here. Investigate it.

Everyone: Be on the lookout for Aether Dragons.

Clearly.

A crime on a hyper dimensional level.

No dragons though. Yet.

Your name is Lou Sleafe. You're a detective, you are also made out of paper, which certainly has its benefits.

Not a moment a go you were in your office, solving crime, the usual. The next you appear to be in an uncharacteristically un-paper like building. Something is afoot, and you'll be damned if you don't get to the bottom of this caper.

You just met a rather odd looking individual. His reaction was...well, it was better than the first person you found in this place, that much is for certain.



You guess you should better go after him.

>_

Maaaaaybe you should let him empty his ammo clip before you do that.

What happened with the first person you met?

The first guy... Did he splurt blood everywhere?

Are you sure this isn't a battle to the death?

What happened with the first person you met?

Well...

FLASHBACK MODE INITIATED



Excuse me, ma'am, but I was wondering if you could he-



I KNEW IT!



I knew paper was behind all this! The grey corridors, the crazy static sky! All the traits of paper mutants!

Really I should of known, paper is notorious for ALL THESE THINGS!



Of course I figured this all out because I am an AMAZING FAMOUS SCIENTIST.

Now release me from your stupid static building which is probably a computer program or something, lest I SCIENCE your face off!

Ah. That's right, a crazy girl in a lab coat tried to kill you.

What did you do again?

>_

>You ran like a bitch. Crazy chick had lasers! You're flammable, come on!

>You gave her a nasty papercut.

Kissed her.

> "Dammit, Anarchy."