It occurs to me...

...that lurking and never posting means that you guys think I either don't exist, don't care, or probably don't know anything going on with me (though I keep tabs via lurking and stuff~).

So, hi~! I exist!


And, I guess this thread can be for general revelations and discoveries. Like how Uncle Phil from Fresh Prince was the voice of Shredder.

Or how long ago the 90s were.

SpoilerShow

I mean 1990 was TWENTY TWO years ago.

This actually came to me a while ago, but it's still relevant today:

Did you know you can just make milkshakes?

For the longest time, I only ever thought of them as things you could get at a restaurant or an old-timey malt shoppe, but I realized one night that they're just, like, stuff in a blender. I did a quick search and it turned out to be even easier than I thought; they're just milk, ice cream, and flavoury stuff, all shoved in a blender and blendered!

It's cool how such a simple thought as "you can make milkshakes" can be so completely astonishing and can reveal just how easy it is to have a blind spot for something and not even realize it.

It occurs to me that Pinary's blender is only slightly-used, and in great condition.

If anyone wants to buy it contact me in a couple of days.

We are only 8 years away from being able to relive the 20s. Everyone start ironing their pinstripes and fedoras.

Didn't we try to do that ten years ago?

But this time it'll be authentic!

I fully endorse bringing back the phrase "What a maroon!", but only if spoken like Bugs Bunny.

I realized the other day that types of pasta are actually plural, but for some odd reason lasagna is singular. Why does only Barilla sell lasagne?

That just makes me want a video cooking series.

"Don't fry this at home" - a series about disastrous attempts to make restaurant foods in your own house.

I like to fry smaller fryers so that my main fryer absorbs their power

2 second chicken hell yeah bitches

You know those little surveys almost every retail store asks you fill out?

They circle the website at the base of your receipt, and try to entice you with the prospect of a weekly drawing?

People read those surveys. Mainly the managers of whatever establishment you've visited. Turns out they those surveys generally have a "comments" section where you can write anything.

Mostly people type "Francis was a great cashier! Very helpful!"
or "Sarah was extremely rude to me!", but why not something like "Jacob has a lovely singing voice!" or "Dimitri is a undead vampire lord and tried to suck my soul. Will not shop again."

Or maybe type in that haiku you've been working on, or fill out a short story with a 500 character limit! At the very least it will slightly brighten the droll day of the retail employee.

No it won't

I would smash the head in of someone who did that to me

Luckily its all done online so it doesn't go to me

Also you get a free whopper or original chicken sandwich by doing the survey at the website given on the back of your burger king receipt so give us a call and tell us how we did -Management

That's just because you don't want your cover as a lord of the undead blown.

I know that, had I received a curious comment via an unorthodox channel during my service the the food/retail sector, I would have greatly enjoyed it. And those comments always went to my direct manager even though they were placed online, and would often get back to the specific employee.

Inflation is a thing and it's chugging along at 3 to 5 percent per year.

What this means. Say I have 200 bucks saves up now in a checking account. Next year it will only be worth 194 dollars. In eight years, my 200 dollars will be worth 120 dollars (by present standards). If that.

This is suddenly becoming a pressing issue especially now that I have to start saving from a real job for retirement which is what only 40 years from now?

On a related note:

I have less than 50 years to live.

Most of the men in my family have passed away in their seventies so I can assume that, assuming I perish in my old age, 70 years old is a safe bet - every year after that is a happy bonus. And I know that I'm a bit older than most people here but not by much.

Some people look at the world and are completely unable to articulate it in prose.

when i have iced tea and the tea is flavored i squeeze the entire lemon into the tea and pretend it was an arlnold palmr