Campusromp

A disreputable-looking undergraduate stands in a disreputable-looking workspace, and eschews any further riffing off of things which have been riffed off of more than any one thing could ever truly deserve.

Also because no introductions are necessary. You know this bitch. Put her through her paces.

SpoilerShow

I was all "yay my first semester concluded peachily, when I go home I'ma make a self-insertventure"

Get home, proceed to forget said idea until 1am

Spend ten minutes scrawling something then call it an OP and a night

>Rifftastic Bitch: Get your riffraff in order and tell us what you gonna do

Time to GET REPUTABLE!

>Rifftastic Bitch: Get your riffraff in order and tell us what you gonna do

Wiiiiiith pleasure.

PHONE has been located! You are more than welcome to give PHONE a nickname, as you are for the most part intangible agents of capriciousness muttering through the fourth wall. It shouldn't make much difference.



PHONE's many talents include service with a smile, a fun motion-sensitive rotating effect that would be cooler if you couldn't use the damn thing on its side, camera, contacts list minion messaging system, and a dozen nifty features that collectively conspire to make a bitch worried something in the proximity of her arse is outsmarting her.

Minions aren't allowed inside the building since the incident with Mephisto and Friends' Impromptu Proctor's Office Picnic. If between the threescore-odd of them they can't think of a Fun Campus Activity, one or more of them could probably be... misappropriated. To similar effect.

Time to GET REPUTABLE!

What

WHAT

What does this look like to you

Does this look like someone with a scarf because if so you are mistaken

Trust me, if a bitch had a scarf with which to nurse their ill repute they totes would. Being the bastard frigid winter it's been, a scarf is essential for all out-of-doors activities like listening to minions complain about how fucking wet it is.

Sadly, a bitch's venerable scarf collection has vanished across the Campus. Probably because scarves are great and any self-respecting academic would insist they'd only be borrowing it for a moment.

Fuckers. A bitch swears, then swears she's gonna track down all her scarves one of these days when she has time (swearing to do so with much swearing therein).

>Rapacious RuffMiss: Look up those ruffians on the contact minionlist

Perhaps you could tidy up?

rifle through the trash for scarfy things

Knit a new scarf, with infinite-inventory pockets.

Bitch, your room is full of shit. Make that shit into a scarf.

no, make one of your minions send you a scarf via carrier eagle

CROCHET a new scarf, with infinite-inventory pockets.

fixed

CROQUET a new scarf, with infinite-inventory pockets.

fixed

BOCCE a new scarf, with infinite-inventory pockets.

fixed

BOTCH a new scarf, with infinite-inventory pockets.

fixed

>Go find some cephalopods, hats, or combinations thereof.

Screw all of this and steal the deans car already. We have all seen 80s movies, we all know what college is REALLY about.

Screw all of this and steal the deans car already. We have all seen 80s movies, we all know what college is REALLY about.

ERROR

As this is NOT AMERICA, bitches think of colleges as "High school but egregiously expensive." Please check your location/privilege to prevent this error from occurring in future.

CROCHET a new scarf, with infinite-inventory pockets.

fixed

A backpack stashed between a couple of desks yields the following:

-One (1) somewhat used ball of Eerily Glowing Violet novelty yarn
-One (1) unfinished minion, in Eerily Glowing Violet novelty yarn
-Jack-knife Jenny, a crochet hook (1/?? found)


Any scarf made out of this would simultaneously make one easy prey for all things nefarious and nocturnal, and some kind of walking crime against good taste. It's mohair, for fuck's sake.

The loot is all stashed in the newly-acquired inventory (bag) nonetheless.

SpoilerShow

I had a continuation with already-given suggestions but then 12am and an early start later that morning happened made a tardy but appreciated appearance in my conscience. I'll keep doing dumb shit later.

What are the stats on that crochet hook?

Sadly, a bitch's venerable scarf collection has vanished across the Campus.

Probably because scarves are great and any self-respecting academic would insist they'd only be borrowing it for a moment.

Oh man this happens all the time!
Seriously, where do all my scarves go?

> Act all posh

(so I looked into NewZealand colleges and whatnot... I don't really see much of a difference, but whateves.)

SpoilerShow

In New Zealand, a "college" is a term most commonly appended to a private high school, whereas you dorks use it to refer to a tertiary institution.

Your post-high school education options are for the most part universities for academia, or polytechnics for more vocational/trade skills.

While we do have institutions like the College of Education, New Zealanders don't "save money for college" or plan to "go to college" when thinking about what to do after high school. Our traditional equivalent is any of around a half-dozen universities, which all offer both undergraduate and postgraduate studies. In New Zealand, "college" is essentially "where Americans go to study after high school, on TV and in the movies and junk."

So it's only the vernacular distinction between high school and college (to use the Americentric use of the word).

SpoilerShow

"Going to University" does have a much more sophisticated ring to it, but if you were to say that over here, the very next question would be "University of what?".

"University" has become more of a term that colleges here tack on to form their brand name, which I suppose is a little sad.

oh! is that knitthread soft? rub it against your cheek and purr :3