The Grand OC III: Do Not Steal: Week.6: UNEARTH!

Meowtherfuckers it's time. (Okay it's like a bunch after time but I'm an ass okay)

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The lights dim on stage for the presentation of the GRAND OC III AWARDS CEREMONY, much like the golden globes except no globes, no gold, and no dignity.

"WELCOME ABOARD!" The walls shake. The chairs are all empty. There is no announcer, only the voice. "THE JUDGING HAS COMPLETED FOR WEEK ONE: NOX."

"THE FIRST PRIZE AWARDED WILL BE THE THE BREVITY AWARD. LIKE ITS NAMESAKE, THIS AWARD NEEDS NO FURTHER EXPLANATION."

And The Winner Is...Show

This award goes to Big Deals, mostly for going above and beyond anybody else and talking out Big's issues with their parents. I feel like maybe vacuum cleaner salesmen pass on some unfortunate aspirations, given the history of vacuum cleaners in battles.

"THE NEXT PRIZE WE WILL UNVEIL IS THE SONORACHEL THEMATIC GOLD RECORD, GIVEN FOR THE MOST THEMATICALLY PLEASING ENTRY TO OUR CONTEST."

And The Winner Is...Show

This one was a toughie, since most of the variations on "nox" did get covered (noxiousness, knocking on things, night...). But this one I think definitely goes to Beacon & Dusk for taking on the most interesting interpretation of night, while still retaining some of that "noxious" feeling in the way darkness leaks from the accursed thing.

"THE SAM WÜN ADAPTABILITY TROPHY IS UP NEXT, FOR THE ENTRY THAT MOST SUITS THE GRAND BATTLE FORMAT!"

And The Winner Is...Show

Stench, previously known as Austen Marsh! I felt like her powers would allow her to be useful in any context without being overpowered, and she's got real personality that would make her fun to write. Beacon & Dusk were also a good contender for this one, but ultimately Stench's personality won out.

"THIS VALUABLE FRAMED PICTURE IS SUPPOSED TO GOES TO COFCA'S EMPLOYEE OF THE DAY. I STOLE IT AND REMOVED THE ORIGINAL PHOTO AND PLAQUE. NOW IT'S AN AWARD FOR SYNERGY WITH THE OTHER ENTRIES SUBMITTED HERE!"

And The Winner Is...Show

There was a lot of competition for this one! Ultimately though, I had to give it to The Broogler, simply because it knows what you did. That's just delightful. Everyone else here must have skeletons in the closet just waiting to be revealed, and that is always good writing fodder.

"THIS UNIVERSE IN A BOTTLE CONTAINS THE ENTIRE GODSWORN VALLEY, OR SO I'M TOLD BY THE SANZH WHO SOLD IT TO ME FOR FIVE BUCKS. IT'S NOW UP FOR GRABS AS THE PRIZE FOR BEST WORLDBUILDING!"

And The Winner Is...Show

Ohhh boy. Until Kilo's last minute submission, I was definitely going to give this one to Headmaster Plumonary, or maybe the Fish Head. But now I absolutely want to know what happened in this world of flying bug robots and how their economy works and what social upheavals are in place now that the war is over and...

"NOW IT'S TIME FOR - oof - THIS STRUGGLING DRAGON FOGEL - ow - TO BE AWARDED FOR BEST/WORST PUN OF THE - stop wriggling - CONTEST!"

And The Winner Is...Show

"Ab knocks fish?" Really? This one goes to Fish Head because that one physically hurt.

"AND FINALLY, THE GRANDEST AND MOST ELABORATE AWARD OF ALL... THE YOU TRIED PARTICIPATION TROPHY, WHICH FEELS LIKE A BACKHANDED COMPLIMENT NOW THAT I THINK ABOUT IT, BUT IT'S REALLY ONLY BECAUSE I RAN OUT OF IDEAS FOR AWARDS."

And The Winner Is...Show

By process of elimination, Headmaster Pulmonary arrives at the last stop on the station. I think I liked the design aspect of the character most - definitely a profile I would have drawn had I decided to do that again this time - but the other profiles outperformed it in worldbuilding, punnery, personality and so on.

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Well, that's all from me tonight! Sorry for the late but probably expected judging, but I hope you all enjoyed participating in this amazing contest and I fully expect one of you to do the next round! Thanks everyone for joining in

[closing music]