Pizzaquest

Get your pizza dammit.

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Oh my! It appears that through various antics that you must read through, you appear to be on top of your box!
Clearly, this is the silliest happening of your day.

What will you do now?

> Cry about how hard it is to read 42 pages of a thing on a lazy Sunday afternoon.
Edit: Ok I caught up
> Carve a rune into one of the walls and summon a cooking demon to assist you.

>Vandalize that portrait, stomp on the box, and tear all the pages out of that book. The world shall drown in your sudden and unjustified rage.

>Peek underneath the box for potential evil clones

Evaluate fourth wall.

rip the painting off the wall and eat it

> Try removing that vent cover and crawl in.

>Don't box yourself in. You're the master of your own domain. Relax, take a chill pill, think about what you wanna do. Box pun.

>PC: Carve a rune into one of the walls and summon a cooking demon to assist you.


Actually, you already have a rune carved into the wall.
But you can't use it just yet...
It's only for when he decides to show up again...

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>PC:Vandalize the portr--


Yea, no. You're not vandalizing your FATHER'S PORTRAIT.
That's one of the only things you have to remember your FAMILY by.

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>PC: Evaluate the fourth wall.


Uhm.. ok.
You view the fourth wall of your APARTMENT.
It's nothing special, really. It's just a wall doing its wall thing.

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>PC: Try removing that vent cover and crawl in.


What vent? You haven't paid for proper air conditioning in years.

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>PC: Don't box yourself in. You're the master of your own domain. Relax, take a chill pill, think about what you wanna do.


You're suddenly hit with a profound thought.
You ARE the master of your own domain.
YOU ARE the one in control!
You know exactly what you're going to do!

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>Next.


You head out of your APARTMENT.
Yep! Exactly!
You leave your shitty apartment, off to do great adventurous things!
This is YOUR day off! And you will make the most of it!

...

Your train of thought comes to a halt as you try to think of what you can do.

>PC: head left and don't stop for anyone or anything.

>Pound on the doors of your neighbors as you walk by. Truly you are as rebel as they come.

> Go to Pizza Hut and order a pizza.

Don't forget to lock your apartment door before leaving this time.

>PC: Head left and don't stop for anyone or anything.


You take off!
Nothing will stop you and your unbridled gourmet fury as you dash down the hall!!

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>Pound on the doors of your neighbors as you walk by. Truly you are as rebel as they come.


You decide to vent your past frustrations with your neighbors by knocking on their doors!
Take that CORNWALLIS DONGUS, your dog needs to have his yap taped shut!

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>Go to Pizza Put and order a pizza.


You come to go an abrupt stop as the seductive thoughts of food enters your mind.
While you could go to the famous chain-pizzeria PIZZA PUT...

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>Next.


Why would you?!?!
Anybody living in THIS CITY would know that local pizzerias beat chain pizzas by a LANDSLIDE.

You stick your tongue out in response to such a putrid thought.

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Show Content

Spoiler no i don't hate pizza hut
wait yea i do
or do i?

Go get a fresh slice of fresh air.

>Vow to make a pizza so great that it will put Pizza Put and all their ilk to shame. A new age is on the way.

wrap the bandanna around your face, become bandito

Order some Dommy Noes instead. Or perhaps, Little Nero's?

> Lick the thought with your stuck-out tongue.

>Order some Dommy Noes instead. Or perhaps, Little Neros?

The thought of 2 other pizzerias with names akin to some other-dimensional counterpart makes you a tad upset actually, you bet that person finds it funny. Making names for fake pizzerias, you bet that that person's having a BLAST at this moment. Do you really think they exist???

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>Next.

Actually yea, they do exist. You don't like them that much really, as to expect with chain pizzerias.

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>Vow to make a pizza so great that it will put Pizza Put and all their ilk to shame.

Actually, you already took that vow! You took it before earning your CHEF'S HAT at CULINARY SCHOOL.
The vow was meant to be the beginning of CHEF's journey to make a NEW AGE of CULINARY GREATNESS. It'll come... eventually.

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>Go get a fresh slice of fresh air.

Actually, that sounds like a neat thought! You head outside your apartment, taking that nice metropolitan air.

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Hm... You know, while you're out, you should probably give THE MAN a visit.
He's probably down at his office, as usual, that remembrance of making the greatest pizza gave you the idea to go visit him.

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>Next.

You think that THE BOSS will take a liking to that idea.

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>Be The Boss.

You're now DEFACTO GUY once more!
You seemed to have gotten yourself in a bit of a scuffle here.

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>Next.

After going up those stairs, you ended up in this dude's office. Turns out he doesn't really take kindly to unexpected visitors. He also said that THE PIZZERIA was closed, but you don't remember the door being locked when you wanted to get some pizza?
He called bullshit on that claim before tying you up. But yea, it seems like you're not gonna be going anywhere for a while.

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Show Content

Spoiler
i spent more time than i should have tracing nero's face onto this lmao

>DEFACTO GUY: Musically shuffle your feet to drop a sweet beat.

Look at the dude with Japanese Vision perhaps he will look friendlier.

Attempt to charm the boss into letting you go.

>DG: Musically shuffle your feet to drop a sweet beat.

You shuffle your feet in an attempt to drop the sweetest beat known to man.
But alas, you can't really think of a good beat due to being bound by SOME BIG ITALIANO.

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>Next.

You feel as if you've accomplished nothing but dissapointing yourself.

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>DG: Imagine the dude through コーンブレッド, perhaps he will look friendlier.

You're not sure how imagining the man who bound you and threw you into a corner through コーンブレッド will change his threat level but hey, you know what they say, it doesn't hurt to try.

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>Next.

You take that back, it actually DOES hurt to try.
Why did you think of THAT of all things holy SHIT.

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>DG: Attempt to charm the boss into letting you go.

After viewing your captor in the worst possible manner you think the best course of action would be to NOT charm him AT ALL.

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It's a bit hard to read but I think that says "What's the matter Defacto-kun? Are you craving my calzones?"