The Book of the Courtier

Vials! Buy one from town if you've got none on ya

You return to town with a suddenly refreshed interest in glassware and go to the apothecary to secure the purchase of a vial.



"Here you are, young boy. You are to be being careful with this, yes?"

"Yes. Actually could I get a couple more, just in case? Maybe actually seven or eight?"

"Of course. You are certain this is all you wish, yes? None of my brewing is interest? Perhaps a love potion for the young lady? She is spirited, no? I can help."

"Thhhhhanks but no thanks."

"If you change mind, young boy, I will be here." The old apothecary winks.

Then to the butcher to get some meat suitable for spider-taming.



"And when my father hears about how unwilling your little 'discount' was, if that's what you want to call rounding the tax down or whatever you did, he is not going to be happy with you, Mr. whatever your name is. Where does this meat even come from if we're all animals, huh? Did you just sell me your cousin or something?"

"Okay, Esme, let's let the nice man work in peace."

Barring any further preparatory purchases you may care to make, the ruins and their octuple-ocular occupant await.

Rope. It's always good to have rope.
Also, bombs.

Actually go get a potion of organ healing. Just in case.

Rope. It's always good to have rope.
Also, bombs.

lamp oil

But yes, a potion sounds good. And perhaps some sort of saddle.

The apothecary regrets to inform you she has no Potion of Replace Kidney. She offers once more her love potion. You thank her but no thank her graciously once more then go out around town once more to purchase:

-Rope, a good fifty feet of it
-"The largest saddle you've got. No, bigger, please."
-A hooded lantern with enough oil to last you a few good hours

Then you make the trek out of the village and past the foreboding tower, to the Ruins.



You arrive a couple of hours later. The air here is dryer. The grass is pale and crisp beneath your feet, hissing into your oversized ears with every step.
The mountains rise sharply into the horizon like the teeth of a great cosmic saw, and there is nowhere to go but inside.

"So. You ready to chicken out?"

Tell her that if she's gonna lecture the pig about selling meat, she shouldn't use bird-related slurs.

Also no, because you're awesome and brave and the best.

Tell her that if she's gonna lecture the pig about selling meat, she shouldn't use bird-related slurs.

Also no, because you're awesome and brave and the best.

Hmm no no. It's their word. The C word.

"No, because I am brave and also great."
"Prove it."
"Also you may want to watch your fowl-related slurs if you're going to berate a butcher for being a pig."
"Whatever. Try and tell me it wasn't weird."

You walk through the great stone entryway. The sounds your footsteps make lengthen and seep into echo through the musty chamber ahead.



Said musty chamber is, for the most part, entirely empty.
There is a door on the far wall, and in the very center of the room, a squat pillar with a book perched upon it.

Examine some carvings and peer into the next room before opening that book.

>With the intent to summon the spider from your currently advantageous location should things go wrong, tap on the wall repeatedly in a pattern of frequencies matching that of a struggling insect in a web! Spider-eating-spiders can do it, and so can you! 8D

We can get that on the way out. SPIDERS AWAIT!

Also check the ceiling

Do not touch that book if it can be at all avoided. Bad Things will probably happen if you do.

(If she calls you a wuss though totally grab it)

You scout ahead; Esme can check out the book. You're... um, better at scouting, probably. Yes.

I'm sure this book isn't important in any way, it's not like there's a book mentioned in the title of this adventure or anything. Just ignore it.

Step on suspicious tiles.

ignore book, it is made out of CYANIDE, which is not as valuable as GOLD.

> Take the book and hug it so hard, it's like you've never hugged before.