Palace Caprae (Sburblike RP)

Okay so man I've been putting this off but I got through the session with Agen a while ago. So here's entry 5, and... let's see, that leaves, tentatively, Jocelyn, Zachary, and... the last spot depends on whether Solaris still wants in, so I'll ask about that.

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SpoilerApr 21 15:03:17 <alex_white> Alex White is sitting at an old mahogany desk. The hardwood floors are cold, as a chill wind blows through the White house. Marionettes on strings strung from the ceiling flutter in the chaotic remnants of the invading breeze, the mansion empty, foreboding, depressing. The lights are nearly all dimmed or off, the butler having retired for the night, the servants sparse or nonexistent, the house a dark shell, with flitting sparks of light passing from chamber to chamber. This is Alex's. She has not left it for several days. It is a neat room, furnished minimally but tastefully, on the second-highest floor. Her parents' bedroom is directly above hers. Her father is away in the Caymans. Her mother is in an urn on the mantelpiece in the main lobby, but that's not where we're looking right now.
Apr 21 15:05:08 <alex_white> Books are strewn across the gargantuan expanse of the desk. It is altogether slightly too big for any normal person, but she likes the space. She is currently reading a popular manga, a secret pleasure of hers. The other books are textbooks and novels, and one large hardcover encyclopedia.'
Apr 21 15:06:18 <alex_white> Her desk lamp casts a round moon on rich wood, inked figures and action; it is an old lamp retrofitted to take flourescent tubes. It was a bit of a hackneyed job, and looks like Alex did it herself. She did.
Apr 21 15:08:36 <alex_white> Her single bed is behind her. An old four-poster she has almost outgrown; she refuses to let anyone replace it. The wood still smells a little of Eau De Flores, not her mother's favorite scent but it was all she could find.
Apr 21 15:09:44 <alex_white> Sometimes, when it grows faint, she pulls out the bottle from one of the cavernous drawers in the desk and dabs a little on one of the four posts, where her mother used to lean when she read stories to her at night. Possibly too nostalgic, but Alex White has never been good at letting go.
Apr 21 15:12:36 <alex_white> One wall, opposite the foot of the bed, to Alex's right, is dominated by a closet. It is slightly walk-in, but not incredibly far; yet it serves its purpose of holding more clothes than anyone could wear in the lifetime if they wore a new outfit every day. Some of this is attributable to the laws of permutation and combination, however.
Apr 21 15:12:54 <alex_white> Alex tends to ignore the inner strata.
Apr 21 15:13:40 <alex_white> Somewhere in there are probably more keepsakes of her mothers', but she doesn't want to delve that far.
Apr 21 15:14:51 <alex_white> On the bed is a computer. Slim, simple. Does the job. Plugged into it is her phone, an equally minimalistic model.
Apr 21 15:16:22 <alex_white> For a room having been lived in for most of a person's life, it bears very little in the way of personal touch.
Apr 21 15:18:49 <alex_white> Yet here and there the wood-panel walls bear little marks, suggesting posters or pictures once. There's a scrap of paper still stuck up between a wall and one of the four posts of the bed, looking like the last fragment of some image or page ripped bodily from the wall.
Apr 21 15:19:18 <alex_white> There's crayon on it if you look. But for now there are more pressing matters on Alex's mind.
Apr 21 15:26:43 <GMedict> >Your phone rings on the desk. It appears you've received a text message.
Apr 21 15:29:31 * alex_white reaches for the phone, gets tangled up in the impossibly-confusing cable linking it to the computer on the bed, and falls over.
Apr 21 15:29:55 * alex_white checks the phone annoyedly.
Apr 21 15:30:29 <GMedict> >Thankfully, nobody is around to see your mishap. You open the text.
Apr 21 15:30:31 <GMedict> >According to the sender, identified as NEODYNIC_NOREPLY, "The public test version of Neodynic's Palace Championship is now available for download!"
Apr 21 15:31:03 <alex_white> Oh.
Apr 21 15:32:15 <alex_white> Wasn't this the thing that the Q&A was for?
Apr 21 15:32:36 * alex_white flinches as she remembers her appalling conduct during the thing.
Apr 21 15:33:03 <alex_white> Stupid Alex.
Apr 21 15:33:31 * alex_white clicks through to the link provided anyway.
Apr 21 15:34:30 <GMedict> >You're taken directly to a download page for Neodynic's Palace Championship.
Apr 21 15:35:05 <GMedict> >The game title is superimposed on a circle, bisected four times into eight pieces.
Apr 21 15:36:41 <GMedict> >Above the download button, the test "Alpha version!" flashes.
Apr 21 15:37:33 * alex_white looks around for a Terms of Service agreement.
Apr 21 15:38:05 <GMedict> >You find no ToS link on the page. Perhaps the terms are included in the installer?
Apr 21 15:38:52 * alex_white looks around for an End User License Agreement
Apr 21 15:39:52 <GMedict> >The download page is abnormally minimalistic. It appears to feature the download button, a contact link, and little else.
Apr 21 15:40:09 <GMedict> >Who do they think they are?
Apr 21 15:41:04 * alex_white touches the contact link, because she wants to know.
Apr 21 15:41:54 <GMedict> >The link opens up a simple form page, featuring only a name, email address, and message field. No actual contact information is provided.
Apr 21 15:43:47 <alex_white> hmmm.
Apr 21 15:44:11 * alex_white copies and pastes the entirety of Hamlet into the message field, fills in her name and email, and sends it off
Apr 21 15:45:38 <GMedict> >Within moments, you receive a text message.
Apr 21 15:46:20 <alex_white> That was prompt.
Apr 21 15:46:25 * alex_white checks phone.
Apr 21 15:47:36 <GMedict> >"We at Neodynic Studios find Prince Hamlet's inner torment to speak deeply to the human soul. The Bard uses this rich tapestry of words to convey that all import-"
Apr 21 15:47:42 <GMedict> >The message cuts off at 160 characters.
Apr 21 15:47:58 * alex_white smiles despite herself.
Apr 21 15:48:18 <alex_white> Close enough.
Apr 21 15:48:24 * alex_white touches the download link.
Apr 21 15:48:33 <alex_white> me keeps an eye out for the ToS.
Apr 21 15:49:20 <GMedict> >The file download progresses quickly, completing within seconds. What kind of cutting-edge augmented reality game fits in a couple hundred kilobytes?
Apr 21 15:49:58 <GMedict> >A "start" button is displayed, and nothing else.
Apr 21 15:52:52 * alex_white quickly rifles through her phone, and checks that no financial information is stored on it.
Apr 21 15:55:28 <alex_white> Hm.
Apr 21 15:55:32 <alex_white> All right, then.
Apr 21 15:55:43 * alex_white presses Start.
Apr 21 15:56:01 <GMedict> >A face icon appears onscreen.

Apr 21 15:56:43 <GMedict> >A voice clip plays: "Welcome to Neodynic's Palace Championship! Preparing for installation unstruction!"
Apr 21 15:57:20 * alex_white pokes the face.
Apr 21 15:58:28 <GMedict> >The face's eyes dart from corner to corner, as if looking around the room.
Apr 21 15:58:59 <GMedict> >It chirps "Insufficient ambient lighting. Automatic installation unstruction not available. Would you like to switch to MANUAL MODE?"
Apr 21 16:00:05 * alex_white gets up and turns up the lights.
Apr 21 16:01:14 <GMedict> >The face looks briefly upset.
Apr 21 16:01:30 <GMedict> >"Ambient lighting sufficient. Testing wireless connection."
Apr 21 16:02:19 <GMedict> >"Wireless connection strength inadequate. Automatic installation unstruction not available. Would you like to switch to MANUAL MODE?"
Apr 21 16:03:05 * alex_white reaches behind the desk, pulls out an ethernet cable, and plugs it into an adapter which she plugs into her phone.
Apr 21 16:03:23 * alex_white checks that the ethernet cable is hooked up to the T2 line.
Apr 21 16:03:32 * alex_white it is.
Apr 21 16:04:15 <GMedict> >The face's mouth hangs open slightly wider.
Apr 21 16:04:50 <alex_white> (hehehehe)
Apr 21 16:05:01 <GMedict> >"Calibration... interleaving... process... irrevocable. Automatic installation unstruction not available. Would you like to switch to MANUAL MODE?"
Apr 21 16:07:44 <alex_white> (seriously debating whether to pull out an automatic calibration interleaver)
Apr 21 16:08:13 <GMedict> (she WOULD have one of those, wouldn't she)
Apr 21 16:08:14 <MrGuy> (You'd need an anti-interleaver)
Apr 21 16:08:20 <MrGuy> (Since the problem is that it's irrevocable)
Apr 21 16:10:02 <alex_white> Hmm.
Apr 21 16:10:14 * alex_white sits there for a moment.
Apr 21 16:10:31 * alex_white is a stubborn girl, and not one prone to giving up.
Apr 21 16:10:57 <alex_white> Hmmm.
Apr 21 16:11:27 * alex_white carefully gets up, the desk chair sliding away behind her.
Apr 21 16:11:52 * alex_white carefully pulls open her bedroom door, and turns on the hall lights.
Apr 21 16:12:17 * alex_white walks to a nice spiral staircase set in the middle of the large hallway, and ascends to the top floor
Apr 21 16:12:56 * alex_white walks back down the hallway, and opens the door to her parents' bedroom
Apr 21 16:13:46 * alex_white stares a little. It has changed very little from the last time she saw it. Then she gathers herself, and rummages through some of her father's files.
Apr 21 16:15:32 * alex_white returns back to her phone and her room with a thick file of statements bearing both the logo of White Financial and that of Microtech, the software corporation.
Apr 21 16:16:13 <alex_white> Now, there wasn't a file on Neodynic…but the Microtech board of directors does have a minority shareholder stake in your parent company...
Apr 21 16:17:04 * alex_white turns and speaks to the face on the screen.
Apr 21 16:18:17 <alex_white> So…tell me about the calibration interleaving process.
Apr 21 16:18:41 * alex_white seems to find what she's looking for in the statements, and writes down a couple phone numbers.
Apr 21 16:19:15 * alex_white then rolls over to her computer and begins looking up the basics of Microtech firmware.
Apr 21 16:19:31 <alex_white> Go on, it's bullshit, isn't it
Apr 21 16:20:00 <alex_white> I can call up someone to have a look at you if you'd like...
Apr 21 16:20:01 <GMedict> >The face puts on a wide smile, but does not respond. Were you expecting that someone was listening in, or that the ~200-kilobyte program featured speech recognition?
Apr 21 16:20:40 * alex_white ponders for a moment.
Apr 21 16:20:48 <alex_white> Okay, this is sort of stupid.
Apr 21 16:21:23 <alex_white> I'm not sure why I thought this would work...
Apr 21 16:21:28 <alex_white> Manual mode it is.
Apr 21 16:21:44 <GMedict> >The face repeats "Would you like to switch to MANUAL MODE?", and a pair of buttons marked Yes and No appear onscreen.
Apr 21 16:23:11 <GMedict> >You press "Yes", and the face responds "Please wait while Neodynic operatives engage MANUAL MODE." and closes its eyes.
Apr 21 16:29:18 * alex_white sighs.
Apr 21 16:29:26 <alex_white> Well, that was…unproductive
Apr 21 16:31:35 <GMedict> >You start to hear a faint whistling noise.
Apr 21 16:32:44 * alex_white attempts to whistle in harmony with it.
Apr 21 16:33:34 <GMedict> >The whistling noise seems to be coming from... above you? And it's getting louder.
Apr 21 16:34:09 <alex_white> Hm.
Apr 21 16:34:27 * alex_white gets up and leaves the room experimentally, to see if the sound changes.
Apr 21 16:35:55 <GMedict> >The sound is indeed getting louder.
Apr 21 16:36:01 <GMedict> >The face on your phone opens its eyes. "MANUAL MODE engaged. Please take cover."
Apr 21 16:44:00 * alex_white stares at the face.
Apr 21 16:44:12 * alex_white dashes back into her room and ducks under the very, very solid desk.
Apr 21 16:46:49 <GMedict> >You briefly begin to wonder why you're following its instructions, but then a massive crash shakes the house and you hear a loud thump from upstairs.
Apr 21 16:46:56 <GMedict> >So that was a good call, you suppose.
Apr 21 16:49:15 * alex_white freezes as she remembers what's upstairs.
Apr 21 16:49:24 <alex_white> shitshitshitshitshitshitshitshit
Apr 21 16:49:32 * alex_white practically flies up the stairs.
Apr 21 16:52:54 <GMedict> >A package about a meter in diameter sits in the ruins of your parents' bed, smoldering and surrounded by stone rubble from the gaping hole in the ceiling.
Apr 21 16:53:31 <GMedict> >Some sort of dented metal plate sits next to the package.
Apr 21 16:54:13 <alex_white> Well.
Apr 21 16:54:22 <alex_white> Well, fuck.
Apr 21 16:54:32 <alex_white> Hopefully Daddy won't notice.
Apr 21 16:54:38 <alex_white> Oh, who am I kidding.
Apr 21 16:54:58 * alex_white cautiously approaches the package and plate.
Apr 21 16:55:27 * alex_white bites her lip and tries not to cry.
Apr 21 16:56:00 <GMedict> >The package appears to be wrapped in some kind of denim-like heavy cloth, which is still giving off smoke.
Apr 21 16:56:20 * alex_white every aspect of her mother that used to permeate the room seems to have been eradicated in one fell stroke.
Apr 21 16:57:01 * alex_white manages to restrain herself from rearranging the dusty, fallen cosmetics on the bedside table.
Apr 21 16:57:11 * alex_white pokes the plate.
Apr 21 16:57:30 <GMedict> >The plate is burning hot! You singe your finger a bit.
Apr 21 16:59:42 <alex_white> ow!
Apr 21 16:59:51 * alex_white sucks on the burnt finger.
Apr 21 17:02:19 * alex_white looks around the room for the first time, and busies herself putting out all the small fires.
Apr 21 17:02:47 * alex_white luckily (or unluckily, given the White family situation) , none of the statements were destroyed.
Apr 21 17:08:13 * alex_white grabs a pair of tongs from the fireplace, and picks up the plate.
Apr 21 17:09:21 <GMedict> >The plate is sort of a very wide cone- you can see it used to have a point in the middle, before it was flattened by some impact.
Apr 21 17:10:33 * alex_white steps into the master bathroom and runs cold water over it.
Apr 21 17:11:18 <GMedict> >The plate gives off plumes of steam, obscuring your vision and filling the room with scalding vapor.
Apr 21 17:11:41 <GMedict> >You're surprised it didn't set the bed on fire when it was lying there in the rubble.
Apr 21 17:14:05 <GMedict> >After the steam clears and the plate cools down, you look it over- it doesn't seem to have any markings or other identifying traits.
Apr 21 17:14:29 * alex_white puts it on her head.
Apr 21 17:15:51 <GMedict> >The plate makes sort of an uncomfortable and precarious hat. You're ready for action now!
Apr 21 17:16:49 <alex_white> :D
Apr 21 17:17:18 * alex_white balances the hat on her head as she heads back into the bedroom, revelling in a moment of silly.
Apr 21 17:17:25 * alex_white then takes it off and hopes no one saw.
Apr 21 17:17:28 * alex_white pokes the package.
Apr 21 17:18:43 <GMedict> >The package isn't as hot as the plate was- layers of fabric seem to have burned away rather than retaining heat.
Apr 21 17:19:15 <GMedict> >Or... not retained heat. Or rather than have retained... grammar.
Apr 21 17:21:25 * alex_white ignores the strangely grammarian fabric, peeling the remnants of it away.
Apr 21 17:22:33 <GMedict> >There are several layers of intact fabric underneath the charred exterior, but you remove them and find... a cardboard box, sealed with ordinary packing tape.
Apr 21 17:26:18 <alex_white> Oh.
Apr 21 17:27:12 <alex_white> hmm.
Apr 21 17:27:30 * alex_white spreads out the burnt fabric onto the ruined bedcovers.
Apr 21 17:27:58 * alex_white looks for a pair of scissors, finds none, and uses the edge of the plate to slit open the packing tape.
Apr 21 17:28:07 <GMedict> >Good thinking. Your parents will need some replacement bedding after this fiasco.
Apr 21 17:28:07 * alex_white tries to ignore the gaping hole in the ceiling.
Apr 21 17:28:13 <GMedict> >You open the box, and find...

22:34 GMedict >ONE (1) leaflet reading "Manual Installation Unstruction Manual".
22:35 GMedict >ONE (1) sprue containing tiny white plastic weapons. It holds a sword, an arrow, and a staff, each of which are about an inch in length.
22:35 GMedict >THREE (3) color-coded bottles of liquid, red, green and blue.
22:35 GMedict >ZERO (0) apologies for crashing through the roof.
22:36 alex_white (?_?)
22:36 alex_white Hmmm.
22:36 GMedict >ONE (1) lit torch.
22:37 GMedict >It's sitting there, in the box, on fire.
22:37 alex_white picks up the red bottle.
22:37 GMedict >The red bottle is unlabeled.
22:37 alex_white drops the red bottle.
22:37 GMedict >You feel a sticky rectangle where some label may have been peeled off.
22:37 GMedict >The bottle hits the ground with a dull thud. Durable.
22:38 alex_white runs into the bathroom and fills a bucket of water, and pours it over the ON FIRE BOX.
22:38 alex_white BECAUSE ON FIRE.
22:38 GMedict >The cardboard box is soaked, while the torch remains blazing.
22:38 GMedict >You're not sure how many ways this is impossible, but it's probably a few.
22:42 alex_white They do say to believe ten impossible things before breakfast.
22:42 alex_white picks up the torch.
22:42 alex_white examines the torch.
22:42 alex_white carries the torch into the bathroom, fills the sink, and drops it in.
22:43 GMedict The water starts to hiss and boil. Steam quickly erupts from the sink and starts to fill the room.
22:48 GMedict >The torch doesn't appear to have been extinguished, from what you can see through the steam.
22:51 alex_white Hm.
22:52 alex_white plots to produce infinite energy.
22:52 alex_white pulls the torch out of the steam and holds it aloft as she walks back to the box
22:52 alex_white picks up the blue bottle.
22:53 GMedict >You scald your hand a bit in the heated water, but you shake it off and inspect the blue bottle.
22:53 GMedict >The blue bottle's label has similarly been removed. You can feel the sticky patch where the label was removed.
22:54 alex_white This one doesn't seem to be on fire.
22:55 alex_white picks up the green bottle, and puts them all in the sink.
22:55 GMedict >The bottles appear to be sealed pretty well. They float there in the hot water.
22:56 GMedict >The green bottle's label was torn away messily- you can see a strip of paper with the letters "rea" and some illegible blue highlighter.
23:00 alex_white Hmmm.
23:02 alex_white puts the flaming end of the torch to the neck of the green bottle.
23:03 GMedict >The bottle is undaunted by your torture. It's been through worse shit than this.
23:03 GMedict >It'll never talk!
23:05 alex_white I don't expect it to.
23:05 alex_white wonders why she said that.
23:05 alex_white leaves the bottles in the sink and drops the torch in again.
23:06 GMedict >Steam billows from the basin again. You're going to have a hell of a time getting everything out without burning yourself.
23:08 alex_white turns off the water.
23:09 GMedict >Oh, right. You drain the sink and are left with three wet bottles and a resolutely flickering torch.
23:10 alex_white examines the bottles again in the hope that there was something like invisible ink on there.
23:11 GMedict >The hot water seems to have washed away most of the sticky stuff, and made the scrap of sticker on the green bottle even less legible than before.
23:11 alex_white Hmm.
23:12 alex_white All...right.
23:12 alex_white resolutely ignores the manual as she rummages into the box again, which is falling apart and soaking the duvet.
23:12 alex_white the scorched, ruined duvet
23:12 alex_white ()
23:13 alex_white picks up the plastic weapons.
23:13 alex_white puts them in the sink.
23:13 GMedict >Neither the weapons nor the plastic frame dealie they come in appear to react to water in any way.
23:13 GMedict >No, wait, scratch that. They totally become wet. That's a reaction, kinda.
23:14 alex_white picks up the plastic frame.
23:17 alex_white PICKS UP THE PLASTIC FRAME.
23:17 alex_white bites the plastic frame.
23:18 GMedict >Your dental assault doesn't faze the frame.
23:18 GMedict >It doesn't look like it's about to do anything.
23:18 GMedict >What are these, playmobil toys?
23:19 alex_white clinks the sword against the staff.
23:19 alex_white Hmm.
23:20 GMedict >The battle is less than epic, except perhaps in the realm of /imagination/.
23:21 alex_white makes the IMAGINATION RAINBOW with her hands.
23:26 GMedict >It's imaginarily beautiful.
23:28 alex_white starts wondering about the hole in the roof.
23:28 alex_white goes downstairs and fetches her phone and laptop.
23:28 alex_white calls a roof repair service.
23:30 GMedict >It's a good thing you know a roof repair service that has experience with castles.
23:30 GMedict >Those fellas are real professionals.
23:34 alex_white What do you mean, you can't be here until Tuesday?
23:35 alex_white hangs up frustratingly.
23:35 alex_white sighs.
23:35 GMedict >Professionalism takes time.
23:35 alex_white picks up the manual.
23:38 alex_white OPENS the MANUAL.
23:38 GMedict >The first page reads, in hasty blue highlighter, "This isn't going to have a lot of fun in it, I don't think, but it's worth a shot. Just follow the instructions and don't panic about things that look like magic."
23:41 GMedict >The following page contains a table of contents. INTRODUCTION, PERIMETRIC APPARATI, REPLICA VERVESSELS, DREAM JOURNEY IMBIBABLES, and INGRESSION are the major headings.
23:55 alex_white
23:55 alex_white looks closely at the highlighter.
23:56 GMedict >It looks like ordinary highlighter, but the handwriting seems kind of familiar.
23:57 GMedict >You'd say it was like your own, but you can tell it's not quite the same.
00:02 alex_white Hmmmm.
00:02 alex_white rummages in her statioey
00:05 alex_white (statiey?)
00:05 alex_white (god i'm so tired)
00:05 alex_white turns to INTRODUCTION
00:08 GMedict >The introduction contains a lot of market-speak about how they're excited that you're participating in this groundbreaking new blah blah blah. This is stunningly unhelpful, but it does mention that you've been provided this manual and collection of supplies to fix a certain critical bug.
00:08 GMedict >Allegedly, this sequence will not be included in the mass-market product.
00:08 GMedict >The words "ignore this" are scrawled in blue highlighter over the pages.
00:09 alex_white
00:09 alex_white reads VERY CAREFULLY.
00:10 alex_white especially the bits about the bug
00:10 GMedict ((aw jeez okay lemme concoct some flavor text))
00:10 alex_white Let me guess, this bug is poorly documented
00:12 GMedict >The introduction is suspiciously unspecific on the nature of the bug. It's possible that the MANUAL MODE package is provided in response to various bugs, or that the bug is a fabrication and something else is at play.
00:14 GMedict >You carefully scan the document for anything that the highlighter may have been trying to keep you from noticing, but you don't find much of interest. Regardless, you make a note to investigate later in case something in it becomes relevant.
00:14 alex_white turns to the next section.
00:15 GMedict >You move on to the subject of PERIMETRIC APPARATI.
00:15 GMedict >"Your Manual Installation Unstruction Kit will provide you with one of a selection of many tools for establishing your Unstruction Perimeter."
00:15 GMedict >"In order to complete Installation Unstruction and proceed to Ingression, you must use your provided tool or tools to establish a defined perimeter around the play area."
00:15 GMedict >"We detect that you have been assigned: the torch!"
00:16 GMedict >"In order to draw your Unstruction Perimeter around the play field, use the torch to draw a trail of flame around the intended play area."
00:17 GMedict >The blue highlighter notes "i don't think it spreads, but this is unnecessary anyway. [illegible] symbolism..."
00:17 alex_white Hmmmmm.
00:17 alex_white moves on to the next section.
00:19 GMedict >The section on REPLICA VERVESSELS reads: "Your Manual Installation Unstruction Kit will provide you with a set of small replica weapons. These are critical to performing Unstruction and completing Ingression."
00:19 alex_white Hmmm? 'Unstruction?'
00:19 alex_white 'Ingression'? I swear they're making this up...
00:20 alex_white turns the page.
00:20 GMedict >"Once you have drawn your UNSTRUCTION PERIMETER and TEMPLATED your REPLICA VERVESSELS by embarking on three DREAM JOURNEYS, insert your chosen VERVESSEL point-first into some point in the playing field.
00:20 GMedict >"This will commence Unstruction!"
00:21 GMedict >The next section is entitled "DREAM JOURNEY IMBIBABLES". Would you like to continue reading?
00:22 alex_white continues reading.
00:22 alex_white but of course.
00:24 GMedict >It continues: "To TEMPLATE your VERVESSELS, you must embark on three DREAM JOURNEYS. The provided MYSTICAL POTIONS will transport you to the REALM OF THE SUBCONSCIOUS, where you will discover the weapons you are meant to wield in this grand adventure!"
00:26 GMedict >The blue highlighter says only "Not poison."
00:44 alex_white Hmmmm.
00:44 alex_white The torch is symbolic, hm?
00:45 alex_white Hmmmm.
00:45 alex_white steps out of her parents' room
00:45 alex_white goes back downstairs to hers
00:45 alex_white rummages through some boxes, and produces a large telescope.
00:56 alex_white opens the case, and pulls out the disassembled telescope.
00:56 alex_white the large lens is about the size of a dinner plate.
00:57 alex_white carefully, she carries it in its foam housing up the stairs
00:57 alex_white and sets it on the bed.
00:58 alex_white She moves to the far side of the room, and pulls a cord disguised as a curtain cord
00:58 alex_white The attic stairs.
00:58 alex_white carries the lens and the torch up into the attic
00:58 alex_white and clambers out onto the roof.
00:59 alex_white steps out into the stiff breeze
00:59 alex_white notes the torch, and its not-going-out ness
01:00 alex_white affixes the torch to her parents' room's fireplace's chimney.
01:00 alex_white goes back down the stairs and picks up a clean silk blanket, and wraps the edge of the lens with it.
01:01 alex_white picks up the lens, and steps up onto the roof again
01:01 alex_white holds the lens up in front of the torch.
01:01 alex_white A mile away, on the edge of the White Estate, a tree bursts into flame.
01:01 alex_white smiles.
01:01 alex_white Hmmmm.
01:03 GMedict >The torch flickers and sheds a few sparks.
01:03 GMedict >Some of the sparks, rather than fading, fly off into the distance towards the tree.
01:03 alex_white slowly turns the lens in a semicircle around the torch, carving out a line of flame around the White House.
01:03 alex_white notes the torch with concern.
01:04 GMedict >The circle is nice and neat. You admire your handiwork for a bit, and hope the blue highlighter was right about it not spreading.
01:07 GMedict >A wall of flame now surrounds the estate. Hopefully it goes out by Tuesday, or you're going to have some very confused roof repairmen on your hands.
01:14 alex_white nods satisfiedly.
01:14 alex_white goes back downstairs, puts the lens away, then goes back to the manual.
01:14 alex_white also takes the torch back down.
01:15 GMedict >Which section of the manual would you like to read?
01:16 alex_white reads the introduction again,
01:18 GMedict >You don't find anything relevant beyond a confusing mention of the main quest being a "journey of dreams", which may or may not be related to the DREAM JOURNEY stuff involving the bottles.
01:19 alex_white takes the hint and goes back to the bottles.
01:19 alex_white TRIES TO OPEN THE BOTTLES.
01:19 alex_white WONDERS WHY SHE DIDN'T TRY THIS BEFORE.
01:20 GMedict >You WONDER WHY YOU DIDN'T TRY THIS BEFORE instead of sensibly blaming some less-than-omniscient narrator figure like a sane person would have, wait, what?
01:21 GMedict >The bottles contain liquids of colors that match their bottles. Maybe. It's hard to tell when liquid's in a bottle.
01:30 alex_white resists the urge to pour them all into the sink.
01:30 alex_white puts the torch back into the sink though.
01:30 alex_white wanders down to the kitchens.
01:31 GMedict >The torch continues hissing and pouring steam into the air, but whatever. Not your problem.
01:33 alex_white picks up ten or so tumblers and a can of NotCoke™
01:34 alex_white doesn't see the cook. That's odd.
01:35 alex_white wanders back up to her parents' room.
01:35 alex_white lays out the tumblers on the sink countertop
01:35 alex_white pours out a little of the three liquids into each.
01:35 alex_white notes their differing viscosities.
01:45 GMedict >The drinks are laid out. Their aroma, entici... wait, no, they don't seem to really have an aroma. If they did, though, they'd probably smell delicious.
02:00 GMedict >You imagine they might smell -exactly- like the narrator fellow succumbing to a timezone-induced stupor and losing consciousness.
02:00 GMedict >Wait, that doesn't sound like it would smell delicious at all.

00:51 alex_white Hmmm.
00:51 alex_white pokes the blue liquid.
00:51 GMedict >The blue liquid is still warm from its bath in the sink earlier.
00:53 alex_white takes a fourth tumbler, and pours some of the blue liquid into it.
00:53 alex_white picks up the red liquid tumbler, and pours some into the fourth tumbler.
00:54 GMedict >The liquids don't seem to mix readily, forming a sort of red and blue emulsion rather than a purple liquid.
00:55 alex_white pours some green in as well.
00:56 GMedict >The resulting mixture is like a lava lamp of red, green and blue, with colors trying to keep together.
00:56 GMedict >It's likely that if allowed to sit, the liquids would separate out.
00:57 alex_white holds the torch under the lava lamp tumbler.
00:57 GMedict >The liquid doesn't seem to react to the heat.
00:57 alex_white Hmmm.
00:58 alex_white opens her can of NotCoke? and takes a sip.
00:58 alex_white pours some into the tumbler, because what the hell.
00:58 GMedict >The soft drink mingles with the liquids, again failing to mix with any color in particular.
00:59 alex_white flips the manual back open to look for references as to these liquids.
00:59 GMedict The red, green and blue liquids now float in fizzy brown refreshment.
00:59 GMedict >You turn to the section on DREAM JOURNEY IMBIBABLES.
01:00 GMedict >"To begin your DREAM JOURNEY, drink an IMBIBABLE of any color!"
01:00 GMedict >That's all it says.
01:00 GMedict >Most of the page is just blank space underneath that sentence.
01:02 alex_white looks for any highlighter.
01:03 alex_white Hmmm.
01:03 alex_white holds the manual over a lightbulb for invisible ink.
01:04 GMedict >You see highlighter on the other side of the page. The writer switched from light blue to red, green, and blue colored highlighters.
01:04 GMedict >The red highlighter says "fight monster to pick melee weapon".
01:05 GMedict >The blue highlighter says "do some magic thing I dont know"
01:05 GMedict >The green highlighter says "shoot the bad guy with something"
01:05 GMedict >You're not sure what all this is referring to.
01:06 alex_white looks at the plastic weapons still in the sink.
01:07 alex_white Well. I don't see any monsters. Or bad guys. And I'm not at all sure about magic...
01:07 alex_white flips back to the section after PERIMETER WHATEVER
01:08 GMedict >"Be careful! Their ends are sharp."
01:08 GMedict >"Once they have been TEMPLATED through your DREAM JOURNEY, you must select a replica and insert it point-first into some location in the play area."
01:08 GMedict >"This act will select both your starting weapon type, and your spawn point in the game world!"
01:09 GMedict <This is in addition to what it read previously: >The section on REPLICA VERVESSELS reads: "Your Manual Installation Unstruction Kit will provide you with a set of small replica weapons. These are critical to performing Unstruction and completing Ingression.">
01:13 alex_white Did...did that say that before?
01:15 GMedict ((i don't have the whole manual written out, and probably should- i've just been serving up additional text whenever a player chooses to read part of it))
01:15 GMedict ((although... hm))
01:16 GMedict ((actually, that could... yes, never mind, carry on))
01:17 alex_white carries on
01:18 alex_white keeps calm and carries on
01:18 alex_white finishes off the GENERIC SOFT DRINK COLA.
01:19 alex_white pokes a hole in the can, puts the torch back in the sink, and makes a stirling engine.
01:22 GMedict >Congratulations! You have unlocked the secret of perpetual motion, probably!
01:23 GMedict >Or rather, the secret of until-whenever-this-weird-torch-burns-out motion.
01:30 alex_white Hmmmm.
01:31 alex_white checks her inventory again.
01:32 GMedict >In addition to what knickknacks you're carrying from before the arrival of the package, you have...
01:32 GMedict >ONE (1) Manual Installation Unstruction Manual
01:32 GMedict >THREE (3) tumblers full of colored liquid
01:33 GMedict >ONE (1) solution of mixed liquids
01:33 GMedict >SIX (6) empty tumblers
01:33 GMedict >ONE (1) sprue containing plastic weapons
01:33 GMedict >THREE (3) partially emptied bottles of colored liquid
01:34 GMedict >ONE (1) legendary torch of everlasting flame or some jazz, currently hooked up to a Stirling engine in the sink
01:35 alex_white stacks the tumblers.
01:35 MrGuy (DRINK ALL THE LIQUID AT ONCE)
01:35 bigro ((hey unrelated question, but is the same liquid I had to deal with? Or does it actually behave))
01:35 GMedict ((different liquid))
01:36 GMedict ((comes from bottles instead of busted-open radios, and is liquid instead of weird magic goop))
01:36 bigro ((always remember that they love it when you set things on fire))
01:37 alex_white points to the ring of flame currently surrounding the White Estate.
01:37 alex_white wonders why she pointed
01:43 alex_white Hmmmm.
01:44 alex_white shakes the plastic weapons out into her hand.
01:44 alex_white Ow!
01:44 alex_white sucks her finger where the plastic sword poked it
01:46 GMedict >The sword, besides being pokey and pointy, doesn't seem to have done anything.
01:46 GMedict >You'll probably be fine.
01:50 alex_white pokes the red liquid with the sword.
01:51 GMedict >You can feel the sword hum a bit when put in contact with the liquid.
01:55 alex_white hmmm.
01:55 alex_white pokes the green liquid with the sword.
01:57 GMedict >You feel no reaction.
02:00 alex_white hmmm.
02:00 alex_white pokes the green liquid with the staff?
02:01 GMedict >You feel no reaction.
02:04 alex_white pokes the YELLOW LIQUID with the staff!
02:04 GMedict >The yellow liquid... wait, where did you get yellow liquid? Did you...?
02:05 GMedict >No, you discard this train of thought.
02:09 alex_white XD
02:10 alex_white pokes the blue liquid with the staff!
02:10 alex_white also pokes the MIXTURE
02:10 GMedict >You can feel the staff hum in response to both the blue liquid and the bits of blue liquid in the soda mixture.
02:11 alex_white drops all three of the weapons into the soda mixture.
02:12 GMedict >The weapons are probably humming in there, but you can't really feel or hear it without touching them.
02:14 alex_white sticks her hand in there.
02:14 GMedict >Yep, they're humming all right.
02:24 alex_white licks her finger.
02:26 GMedict >You catch a taste of what seems uncannily like orange juice mixed with Pepsi, before you start to feel lightheaded.
02:26 GMedict >You begin to hear a buzzing in your ear.
02:28 alex_white digs a finger in her ear and turns around.
02:29 alex_white spins around in circles a bit, trying to pin down the noise
02:29 GMedict >The buzzing begins to echo, and your vision starts to get blurry.
02:29 GMedict >"Not poison", your ass.
02:33 alex_white grabs the edge of the sink.
02:33 alex_white reaches the manual, still lying on the countertop, now slightly steam-cleaned.
02:33 alex_white tries to peruse it with blurry eyes for anything
02:34 GMedict >Your eyes fall on the portion of the manual that read "not poison" in highlighter. You try to focus on the page, but your vision is swiftly dimming and your muscles are losing their movement.
02:38 GMedict >You try to stay in control, but your body isn't responding.
02:38 GMedict >You fall to the floor, unconscious.
02:38 GMedict >Much like some guy in another universe is about to fall unconscious, because it's 2:30
02:38 GMedict >and not PM
02:39 GMedict >that guy would probably apologize if he were real, from your perspective
02:40 GMedict >in that guy's universe, he probably lives on the opposite side of the world from some other person, and consequently has about four hours of overlap with said other person, awakeness-wise

23:12 GMedict >You are now fighting an ogre, in front of a glowing portal, on the ramparts of a castle.
23:12 GMedict >It's waving its club about in a hostile manner.
23:14 GMedict >It swings its club at you! What do you do?
23:15 alex_white boggles at it!
23:15 alex_white also ducks!
23:15 alex_white tries to figure out what the hell is happening!
23:15 GMedict >You duck out of the way just in time, but you drop your weapon in your panic!
23:15 GMedict >It hits the ground nearby.
23:15 GMedict >You can't... quite... make out what it is.
23:15 alex_white What the...
23:15 alex_white scrabbles towards it!
23:16 GMedict >You're still feeling lightheaded, and your perception of the situation is fuzzy.
23:16 GMedict >Regardless, you retrieve your weapon!
23:16 GMedict >The ogre doesn't look happy.
23:21 alex_white tries to figure out what the hell it is!
23:22 GMedict >You focus your efforts on figuring out what it is you're holding.
23:22 GMedict >What is it you can use to strike down the ogre?
23:23 GMedict >Before it can bear its club against you again... what is it?
23:23 GMedict >_
23:25 GMedict ((this is one of them sensitive choices- selecting your character's melee weapon))
23:25 alex_white brings the staff around in a wide arc. The wood - you could have sworn it was white and plastic a second ago - is stronger than it seems, ringing against the ogre's leather armor with a sound like tearing metal sheets.
23:26 GMedict >The ogre is caught off-guard by your retaliation! It stumbles, dangerously close to the edge of the castle wall.
23:27 alex_white places the staff at the base of its fleshy neck with a grace she doesn't remember possessing, and forces it backward another step.
23:28 GMedict >The ogre cries out, raising a hand to where it hurt its neck, and bracing its other hand against the wall.
23:29 GMedict >It recovers quickly, however, and lowers its hand from its wound to take hold of its club.
23:34 alex_white kicks it in the crotch.
23:39 GMedict >An ogre's childhood features crotch-kickings by its friends and family rather prominently. One would expect a beast so accustomed to such things would view your attack as little more than an annoyance.
23:39 GMedict >One would expect this, but this is not the case.
23:39 GMedict >The ogre, overcome with agony, stumbles back and tumbles over the parapets.
23:46 alex_white looks down over the parapets after it
23:49 GMedict >It's not pretty. A couple of guards are down there, poking its legs with their spears.
23:49 GMedict >You suddenly feel a rush of vertigo!
23:50 GMedict >Your mouth fills with a bitter taste- like coffee, with some sort of fruit in it.
23:59 GMedict >The scene before you dissolves, and you find yourself... on the ramparts of a castle.
23:59 GMedict >Down in the courtyard, you see your quarry- the corrupt baron of the fiefdom.
23:59 alex_white o_o
23:59 GMedict >Nearby, on the wall, an ogre stands in front of a magical portal, but this somehow seems less important.
00:00 GMedict >You hold a weapon in your hands. It will be the baron's downfall.
00:00 GMedict >You're not... quite sure what it is, though.
00:01 alex_white stares at the JETPACK in her hands.
00:01 PickYerPoison (( yessssssss ))
00:02 PickYerPoison (( YESSSSS ))
00:02 GMedict ((hm... jetpack as "ranged weapon". y'know what? i can roll with that.))
00:03 GMedict >Your rocket-powered device is ready. The baron won't know what hit him.
00:03 GMedict >Quite literally, probably. Jetpacks aren't common in feudal societies.
00:07 alex_white carefully slides her arms through the straps of the jetpack, and checks its energy levels
00:09 alex_white activates it with a flick of a hard-to-reach switch on the back which requires a little flexibility and maneuvering
00:09 GMedict >The jetpack is fully charged. You're not sure how much fuel that actually means it has, or if it overheats, or if it's even remotely safe... but those concerns are secondary.
00:09 alex_white levitates into the air on invisible pulses of energy!
00:11 GMedict >The fuel gauge begins draining. It's now or never.
00:12 alex_white carefully directs the jetpack with the little controls by her hand.
00:12 alex_white maneuvers carefully until she is above the baron...
00:13 alex_white descends. Ever so carefully she descends - and presses a button!
00:14 alex_white jets of flame shoot out of the jetpack's jets, incinerating the baron and propelling her into the air, safely far out of range of retaliating arrows.
00:14 alex_white considers the next problem: getting down...
00:16 GMedict >Your fuel is running dangerously low, and what's worse! You're developing a case of vertigo.
00:16 GMedict >This is not a winning proposition for someone riding a jetpack.
00:19 alex_white realllllllyyyyy hopes for a deus ex machina.
00:20 alex_white barring that, she turns off the flame and begins descending as fast as she can without it being horribly dangerous to land
00:23 GMedict >You make haste for what you're /pretty/ sure is the ground, before your vision fades once again.
00:23 GMedict >An offensively sweet taste invades your mouth.
00:24 GMedict >You awake in front of a glowing magical portal. On the castle wall with you is an ogre, but it doesn't seem to be interested in you right now.
00:24 GMedict >The portal is a portal to another world, through which a demonic horde is soon to charge.
00:24 GMedict >You hold in your hands an artifact of great power with which to seal the rift.
00:24 GMedict >You know that with its power, you can rescue the land from destruction.
00:24 GMedict >But what, exactly, is it?
00:32 alex_white holds the ANKH in her hand. It is polished silver, gleaming white and grey and casting strange shadows in the unearthly light shining before her.
00:36 GMedict >With the power of the ANKH, you can cast a spell to seal the rift!
00:38 alex_white tries to figure out how.
00:38 alex_white This is not an intuitive solution.
00:39 GMedict >Magic seldom is.
00:40 GMedict >It's your practice to put everything to question, to know your craft inside and out before you act...
00:40 GMedict >But there's a horde of angry demons charging for the portal, so perhaps it's time to act on instinct.
00:41 alex_white stares at the portal in front of her. It is an arch, lettered with glowing symbols, the interior of which is a roiling mass of sensory madness.
00:41 alex_white hears the roars of the demons behind it, getting louder with every moment.
00:48 alex_white hmmmmm
00:48 alex_white steps back.
00:49 alex_white stares at the portal, towering above her. Behind it lies chaos, disorder - demonic forces preparing to rend the world apart.
00:49 alex_white stares at the Ankh in her hand.
00:50 alex_white knows it is the symbol of life as well as death - death was not so much a sleep for the Ankh-holders but rather another kind of life; a cycle. Ordered, undertandable, collected.
00:50 alex_white understands the meaning of symbolism.
00:51 alex_white holds up the ankh by its loop, in front of her, the demonic sounds deafening now, her tongue numb from the saccharine taste of the air-
00:52 alex_white inserts it into the portal, end-first, and gives it a mighty turn.
00:54 GMedict >The portal twists in place, swiftly collapsing in on itself.
00:54 GMedict >All that remains is a tiny point of light, which soon winks out.
00:55 GMedict >The world is safe! The baron is roasted! The ogre is dead!
00:56 GMedict >Suddenly, the distinctive taste of your favorite cola brand fills your mouth.
00:56 GMedict >Your vision fades out and back in again, and you find yourself floating in a lake- no, an /ocean/ of soda.
00:58 alex_white o_o
00:59 alex_white wonders if she has died somehow.
01:01 GMedict >You seem very much alive, but you're starting to doubt your decision to mix soda with powerful hallucinogens.
01:01 GMedict >You don't see a boat or anything nearby.
01:02 alex_white wonders how she is floating.
01:04 GMedict >The soda is more dense than water, which would explain your buoyancy if this weren't an elixir-induced hallucination.
01:08 alex_white ...takes a sip of the soda?
01:08 GMedict >oh my gosh this is so delicious
01:09 GMedict >You enter a state of delirium for an instant, before suddenly regaining consciousness in a strange environment.
01:09 GMedict >It's so strange! There's this weird block of material with little glass cups on it, and the cups are full of liquid, and...
01:09 GMedict >Wait.
01:18 alex_white waits.
01:19 alex_white is still waiting.
01:20 GMedict >You are back in your kitchen!
01:20 GMedict >Your DREAM JOURNEY has concluded.
01:23 GMedict >What will you do now?
01:24 alex_white reads...the manual...she guesses
01:24 alex_white checks the little plastic weapons in the mix tumbler.
01:26 GMedict >The plastic weapons are now colored, where previously they were white! The sword is red, the arrow is green, and the staff is blue.
01:27 GMedict >The section on REPLICA VERVESSELS reads, as it did before:
01:27 GMedict 01:08 GMedict >"Be careful! Their ends are sharp." 01:08 GMedict >"Once they have been TEMPLATED through your DREAM JOURNEY, you must select a replica and insert it point-first into some location in the play area." 01:08 GMedict >"This act will select both your starting weapon type, and your spawn point in the game world!" 01:09 GMedict <This is in addition t
01:28 GMedict >There is one section remaining to the manual, headed "INGRESSION". Would you like to read it, or use a REPLICA VERVESSEL?
01:28 alex_white reads
01:28 GMedict >"Once you have inserted your REPLICA VERVESSEL, the Unstruction of your installation will begin!"
01:29 GMedict >"You will see a bright light beyond your Unstruction Perimeter, which will begin sweeping across the area designated."
01:30 GMedict >"Do not panic! Once Unstruction is complete, you will undergo INGRESSION and begin the game proper."
01:30 GMedict >"Have fun!"
01:33 alex_white Hmmm.
01:33 alex_white That's odd. No highlighter?
01:35 GMedict >The reverse has some highlighter, but the writer appears to have written over it repeatedly. It's difficult to make out what it says, but you can make out the letters "pocaly" in there somewhere.
01:43 alex_white Well.
01:43 alex_white All right.
01:44 alex_white carefully picks the weapons out of the tumbler, still stumbling a bit from the massive trip just had.
01:45 alex_white Ow!
01:45 alex_white has just stuck the staff point-first into her hand.
01:45 GMedict ((and that makes two))
01:46 alex_white ((:3))
01:46 GMedict >You see a flash of light outside your window. Something is happening.
01:46 GMedict >The sky, formerly clouded and dark, has become a bright white.
01:46 alex_white sticks her hand into the tumbler to stop the bleeding.
01:47 alex_white notices the crisp shadows suddenly outlined against every window.
01:47 alex_white squints and tries to look out the window.
01:47 GMedict >The decision to sterilize the wound with a sugary concoction of hallucinogens was truly inspired, and a good idea.
01:47 GMedict >Out the window, you can no longer see the line of fire.
01:48 GMedict >Only whiteness as the ground outside dissolves and vanishes.
01:49 alex_white Oh.
01:50 alex_white holds up the last page of the manual up to the light again, trying to make out more of the highlighte.
01:50 alex_white r
01:51 GMedict >Around the "pocaly", you can see "ssibly an a" and "pse, but ne", covered with "ver min" and "erra unp". There's a few question-mark-shaped bits, too.
01:52 GMedict >The whiteness is getting very close to the house.
01:58 alex_white runs up to the roof!
02:00 GMedict >The whiteness is getting further away from the house. Or, from the walls of the house. Because it appears to have passed through them.
02:04 alex_white is confused at this linguistic turn of events
02:06 GMedict >If the house can be said to be defined by its walls, then if something goes through the walls, and passes into the house, then is it getting further away from or closer to the house?
02:06 GMedict >These deeply stupid philosophical questions are probably completely relevant right now.
02:06 GMedict >Regardless, the whiteness is definitely getting closer to /you/.
02:18 alex_white steps back down into her parents' bedroom.
02:19 alex_white stands in front of her mother's dressing-table as the whiteness closes in...
02:20 alex_white picks up an old photograph of her parents, each holding a hand of a much younger Alex.
02:20 GMedict >The white void first swallows the ruined bed, and then surrounds you as you hold the photograph in front of the dresser.
02:21 GMedict >You hold the photo tight as the void swallows you up, and you lose consciousness.
02:21 GMedict >Congratulations!

so yeah 5/8 rigmaroles complete before i can start doin REALSTUFF

2014 YEAR OF THE REBOOT
2014 YEAR OF THE REBOOT
2014 YEAR OF THE REBOOT