Ratslaying contest

You awaken in a featureless gray void. "Horizontal" extends in a plane around you. A diffuse white light filters down from above. You behold yourself with senses. Who are you?

CREATE CHARACTER PLEASE

Rattigan Rattus, ace rat hunter extraordinaire

Marcus March, rodent trapping prodigy.

i am............... the light diffuser

oogie boogie from the nightmare before christmas

Rattigan Rattus, ace rat hunter extraordinaire

oogie boogie from the nightmare before christmas

i am............... the light diffuser

Marcus March, rodent trapping prodigy.

You are Rattigan March, the Cross. You wield the powers of a hunter, and you possess a Light Steed. You know that you have a physical form and can manipulate reality around you.

You experience a brief sensation of confusion as to your purpose. Why are you here? And then you look behind you.



KILL 14000 RATS

retrieve ratting piece from horse.
the ol blunderbuss hasn't failed you yet

hmm. kill fourteen thousand rats doesn't quite have the same ring as kill six billion demons, does it.

use bug spray.

>With years of dance and martial arts classes you have turned your own body into a finely tuned killing machine whose moves are as sick as they are deadly.

>Now boogie your way into murinocide.

>Summon rain of rat-killing arrows.

>Summon sunlight.

retrieve ratting piece from horse.
the ol blunderbuss hasn't failed you yet

hmm. kill fourteen thousand rats doesn't quite have the same ring as kill six billion demons, does it.
use bug spray.

You feel around your person and your Light Steed's person. Neither of you appear to have objects of any worth in your possession. Your Light Steed makes noises of discontent as the rats approach.

>With years of dance and martial arts classes you have turned your own body into a finely tuned killing machine whose moves are as sick as they are deadly.
>Now boogie your way into murinocide.

You leap off of your Light Steed and enter a dance of death, killing 4 rats with a single blow each as they swarm towards you. However, two rats slip past your guard and find purchase in your skin, leaving small bite marks.

>Summon rain of rat-killing arrows.
>Summon sunlight.

You focus on the corpse of one of the rats, pouring your reserves of energy into it. It begins to emanate the concept of Light.

KILL RATS PLEASE

>Rat: Burst into flames. Let a phoenix be born from you.

the ratting piece is gone
...
....
.....
......
feel the rage burning within you against all ratkind, for the filthy residents of rodentia must have pilfered your prized ratting piece, they must have known of its deadly prowess at slaying rats in vast quantities, and scattered its components to the winds

smash those rats with your bare hands, smash with a fury you haven't felt since the last ratty crusade against the cheddar brigands of 96, when a rapscallion dared to befoul your rations and humiliate your watchguard prowess

suffer not the rat
smash the rat
smash the rat
smash the rat
smaaaaaaaaash
theeeeeeeeeee
raaaaaaaaaaat

the ratting piece is gone
...
....
.....
......
feel the rage burning within you against all ratkind, for the filthy residents of rodentia must have pilfered your prized ratting piece, they must have known of its deadly prowess at slaying rats in vast quantities, and scattered its components to the winds
smash those rats with your bare hands, smash with a fury you haven't felt since the last ratty crusade against the cheddar brigands of 96, when a rapscallion dared to befoul your rations and humiliate your watchguard prowess
suffer not the rat
smash the rat
smash the rat
smash the rat
smaaaaaaaaash
theeeeeeeeeee
raaaaaaaaaaat

You recall your previous existence. The memory gives you strength, and you destroy 2 rats more. Unfortunately, the rats have now surrounded you, and two of them dart in to bite you. You have now suffered 4 rat bites.

>Rat: Burst into flames. Let a phoenix be born from you.

You focus further, spending reserves of a different sort. The rat corpse now emanates the phenomenon of Flame. From the flame erupts a phoenix, a golden-feathered eagle with talons of brilliant sapphire. It grasps 1 rat in those talons and begins to eat.

You have exhausted your ability to fundamentally alter reality. You feel tired.

THIRTEEN THOUSAND NINE HUNDRED NINETY-THREE RATS REMAIN

>Use more of your mad Capoeira skills to kill the remaining flankers then while the phoenix keep more rat from comming, take the precious pelt and fro,nt teeth from your prey.
>jump on your trusty steed and start riding east to the nearest rat hunter lodge to collect pay and rest.

Back on the horse where they can't reach you

Move the bird a little down and to the right so it looks like it's diving on something.

>Phoenix: I dub thee, April Phoenix.
>Mr. Phoenix: Make a wall of fire to protect Mr. March from getting hurt by the rats.

>Use more of your mad Capoeira skills to kill the remaining flankers then while the phoenix keep more rat from comming, take the precious pelt and fro,nt teeth from your prey.
>jump on your trusty steed and start riding east to the nearest rat hunter lodge to collect pay and rest.

You swiftly break the necks of 4 more rats by the violence of dance. You try to believe there is a lodge waiting for you. But you remember the rules of the contest, though you do not remember entering it:

YOU AND THE RATS ARE PLACED ON AN INFINITE FLAT FEATURELESS PLANE WHERE YOU WILL DO BATTLE. YOU WIN IF YOU KILL ALL THE RATS, THEY WIN IF YOU DIE BEFORE DOING SO.

There will be no lodges.

Back on the horse where they can't reach you

Regardless, you collect the 10 rat corpses you have accumulated (including that which emanates Light and Flame - you quell the fire against the surface of the void), extricate yourself from the rats, and mount your Light Steed in preparation to leave behind the Swarm. You suffer 0 additional rat bites as you do this.

Move the bird a little down and to the right so it looks like it's diving on something.

April Phoenix drops its dying prey into your waiting arms, then dives down and grabs one additional rat in each talon.

>Phoenix: I dub thee, April Phoenix.
>Mr. Phoenix: Make a wall of fire to protect Mr. March from getting hurt by the rats.

The Phoenix then vanishes into the grey ether of your world. It leaves behind a cloud of smoke which briefly screens you from the Swarm. You command your Light Steed to flee the site of combat, and ride for a length of Time. You can see the Swarm following in the distance behind you, but it is noticeably slower.

AVOID DYING PLEASE

>Well contest or not, you're exhausted and are going to eventualy collapse at which pointt he swarm will catch up and you are dead. So use what little of your reality altering power you have left to create some kind of safe place to rest in or hope your steed is that endurant it can keep ahead forever.

kill all the rats now

>Remove rat teeth from dead rats, use as caltrops to delay the fiends from nibbling at your kneecaps.

>Well contest or not, you're exhausted and are going to eventualy collapse at which pointt he swarm will catch up and you are dead. So use what little of your reality altering power you have left to create some kind of safe place to rest in or hope your steed is that endurant it can keep ahead forever.

You commune with your Light Steed and grant it the Aspect of the Hart. Its speed increases, now nearly four times the speed of the Swarm on the hazy horizon.

>Remove rat teeth from dead rats, use as caltrops to delay the fiends from nibbling at your kneecaps.

You extract the teeth and skins of the dead rats, scattering the former on the ground behind you. Time passes, and you stop. You and your Light Speed attempt to sleep. It is not easy, with the endless dull grey light above, but you feel safe after checking the horizon and seeing that the rats have slowed their advance in the Zone of Teeth. You sense that 3 rats have perished in the crush at the Teeth.

kill all the rats now

You awaken from a dream of blood and brown fur. In it, you had killed all the rats, but you persisted in this world, without a purpose. You check the horizon: The rats are still distant. But you feel your natural gifts returning. Your wounds have completely healed, and you feel Hunger and Thirst.

THIRTEEN THOUSAND NINE HUNDRED EIGHTY-FOUR RATS REMAIN

Drain all of the rats' blood and memories. Feed.

gather the skins and bones, create a banner from the pieces