You Wake Up In A Bar

I didn't mean NAME's equivalent of us. I meant NAME's equivalent of you.

I'm not your master. I may have created you, but you don't have a 'master'. Neither does NAME.

They are, as you are, experiencing my universe through a very small lens. NAME seemed to have some special abilities-- such as receiving some sort of 'bio' on you upon meeting you, similarly to your own ability.

>A blue corrugible includes the ash you made, some pressed blueberries, vodka, and petrol. It must be thoroughly corrugiblated in a corrugiblator, so hopefully your bar's corrugiblator is one of the newer, quieter ones. Traditionally served in a half-cylinder glass.

Created?
Hmhmhmhm.

Well, such things fall outside our jurisdiction.
We are here to tend a bar, and tend a bar we shall.

>Add two drops of Undine's tears to the corrigible.
>Small, crystal looking bottle, murky blue substance smelling faintly of fish?

>swan are fricking evil so jus give em a cup of your tears infuses with cigarette ash and bitterness

oh shit its the gold tender dude! hi big goat

oh shit its the gold tender dude! hi big goat

Hi.

I see the 'goat' resemblance. I'm uncomfortable with the fact that you've just sent NAME to boil one, with that in mind.

HEYIDIDNTKNOW

I'm willing to take any last questions before I send you out permanently, and cease contact until our next in-person meeting. Again, apologies for the interruption. Soon it will be smooth sailing.

WHEN DO WE GET SOME MORE SHIT. WHY ARE WE BARTENDING WITH LIKE TEN ICE CUBES THREE PLATES AND HALF A CUP

WHEN DO WE GET SOME MORE SHIT. WHY ARE WE BARTENDING WITH LIKE TEN ICE CUBES THREE PLATES AND HALF A CUP

I never said this job would be easy.

I don't have the time to bother learning how to be a bartender even close to what you will one day become. Had I handed you a bar with all the necessities at the word 'go', you would have never been on track to learn through hardship. I am preparing you for the difficulties of this universe, and I am certain you will one day thank me.

If we stop providing inputs, what happens to Drinkmaster Greene?

Also, would you care for a henway?

If we stop providing inputs, what happens to Drinkmaster Greene?

There are some volunteer services like Bodi-Well who take care of empty hosts 'posthumously'. The state isn't far from a comatose one, and some have ethical issues with such a thing.

I might be able to retrieve your Input Aggregator and find another source of inputs in this case, but I'm not enthusiastic about scouring the wide universe for something I intentionally made nigh-impossible to find.

Also, would you care for a henway?

I have enough harassing me while I'm trying to work. Thank you for the offer, though.

If we stop providing inputs, what happens to Drinkmaster Greene?

Also, as a sidenote, from here on out it will be more productive to assume that you, as with the rest of your inputs, collectively make up 'Drinkmaster Greene'. You are the bartender as much as a typical being is a collection of neurons. I feel you are not controlling this being, but instead composing your own consciousness.

Some would disagree, philosophically, but they've little justification. You, Greene, really ought to be treated like any other sentient being, but rarely is this done.

yes i have a very important question what are ur thoughts on this

yes i have a very important question what are ur thoughts on this

I like it, Greene. Thanks.

I believe I'm going to get off, now.

It was enjoyable to talk to the real Greene. We will meet again.

Please have an open mind.

g'bye gold guy who looks like us!!!

g'bye gold guy who looks like us!!!

Goodbye, artist.

The Page 9 Recap

Starring: Drinkmaster Greene, Our Protagonist

You rise in enthusiasm, and it's as if not a moment passed from the last instance of dialogue-- even if, in the back of your mind, you felt as if there had been quite the pause. It's time to properly greet the new arrivals, Bloomy and Sublimate.









Your Egg Coordinator, Stax, has also risen in enthusiasm. You're still not sure to what extent this is genuine, but... it's a bit better than what felt like incessant complaints.




Laren manages a smile. As conversation picks up momentum, you start preparing Sublimate's rather convoluted drink-- a large array of ingredients with varying portions. You begin pressing blueberries into a paste, hoping to extract the blue coloring, though it doesn't go exactly to plan.









Bloomy sinks into Laren's weight, a bit concerned. It seems that your interpretation of the 'cat food casserole' may have hit a snag-- but you're not quite willing to give up yet. A bartender must necessarily improve and improvise. Hey, they're practically the same word anyhow!






Something about what she's said seems to assure the cat, who relents-- though you can't really decipher what's being said.




Sublimate squints her mechanical eyes towards you.




Before you can properly respond and assure her, O'Hare raises his head, previously quite lost in thought. He speaks, concerned, in the sort of tone reminiscent of when you dosed yourself with a potent sedative. Oh, those were the days. The today days.












The corrugiblator fires up-- and you begin corrugiblating the cocktail as fast as you can figure out its controls and read the cryptic manual. It's not the easiest task, though you do your best to keep conversation as you finish Sublimate's drink.






Finally-- you shift around to hand the mechanical swan her order.






Sublimate takes it between her wings with an audible 'creak', and though her grip is a tad shaky, she doesn't seem anything but confident-- excited.

















After finishing her fifth long sip on the ashen corrugible, Sublimate finally shares her thoughts, with a metal beak still wet with the incongruent substance.








O'Hare finally finishes gathering his things- including the first aid kit he'd brought for you on his first arrival- and hoists them up to carry. He also places down a handful of coins.










O'Hare has left very satisfied with both his drink and meal, and will likely come back again. You have gained fifty red glass tokens.

With a heap of pride, Stax motions to a hot skillet on the stove behind you-- currently cooking up what appear to be some... odd-looking eggs. You don't think they came from a chicken.




As this is the final meal you're aiming to make until the midday lunch reaches its conclusion, you're nearly to your third bartending level. It has also been about 1/3rd completed with Stax's help, though you're not entirely certain what he's been doing with it this whole time.

Cup status: 1 occupied (Sublimate's Ashen Corrugible), 2 dirty (Rooted Bean, Dynamic Dynamite), 3 free
Plate status: 1 occupied (Bloomy's unfinished meal), 2 dirty (TQoaBT, Y,SY,S), 1 free
Scavenger ability: Activated (0 uses)
Intrusive ability: Enabled

Due to your advanced 'tending on the Ashen Corrugible, you've gained several new entries for your codex of ingredients-- the Cabinet.

Author's NotesShow

From a rather turbulent couple of weeks comes another YWUIAB update. Thanks again to all for being patient, but... especially thank you for being so kind when I feel anxious about getting updates out. I am in love with this adventure and want to see it go on, but sometimes things just blow out of proportion and become intangibly painful to do. I had the worst panic attack I've ever had last Wednesday, and I've sort of been working to reset from that.

Special thanks to Myeth for the new and improved Drinkmaster Greene illustration! It's really awesome to see 'em improved like this and I've fallen in love with the design by now.

I'm really, really happy to have this update out. Enjoy the jazz and enjoy the drinks. Thanks.

Oh, and the first time a character is mentioned in an update, their name will be highlighted with a link to their most recent intro card-- so you can keep up to date on what they look like without having to scroll several pages back!

but we don't have time for both an ice cream sandwich AND a massage, so while the corrugible is in the oven, we'll cover our hands with ice cream and give him an ice cream shoulder rub (which will really help with the too-hot-to-handle thing)

this will also help keep him cool. whisper in his ear "you got this" as he finishes the omelette. make sure to actually dump some cat food in there at least

Stax can get started on his deluxe sandwhich.

Let's have him whip up some waffle batter. Sugar, eggs, milk and flour. Since we don't have any more milk, let's substitute it with a juicy cup or two of ground beetles. And throw some dried cherries into the batter for added deluxe.

Stax can get started on his deluxe sandwhich.

Let's have him whip up some waffle batter. Sugar, eggs, milk and flour. Since we don't have any more milk, let's substitute it with a juicy cup or two of ground beetles. And throw some dried cherries into the batter for added deluxe.

Seconding! Also put a bit of Chocolate Sauce and Vanilla Ice Cream!

Stax can get started on his deluxe sandwhich.

Let's have him whip up some waffle batter. Sugar, eggs, milk and flour. Since we don't have any more milk, let's substitute it with a juicy cup or two of ground beetles. And throw some dried cherries into the batter for added deluxe.

Seconding! Also put a bit of Chocolate Sauce and Vanilla Ice Cream!

Maybe those shouldn't be put in the batter though.

Stax can get started on his deluxe sandwhich.

Let's have him whip up some waffle batter. Sugar, eggs, milk and flour. Since we don't have any more milk, let's substitute it with a juicy cup or two of ground beetles. And throw some dried cherries into the batter for added deluxe.

Seconding! Also put a bit of Chocolate Sauce and Vanilla Ice Cream!

Maybe those shouldn't be put in the batter though.

We Eat Like Aliens We Live Like Aliens!

>PLACE ICECREAM N CHOCOLATE SAUCE IN BATTER