"Seriously brain, what the hell?" A Thread For Weird Dreams and Nightmares

I really hate violent nightmares.

Had a dream this morning that a man was repeatedly breaking into my apartment through the window to eat CDs and shoes. His mouth would open super wide and he'd just bite right into em and rip em apart.

I was getting pretty sick of this so I tried chasing him when he left and followed him into a forest that doesn't actually exist near my apt and into a weird school/mall/auditorium that also shouldn't exist. He suddenly changed clothes to look more well-kept and ran inside (the clothes just sorta appeared on him).

When I got inside there was a huge crowd. He was at a booth signing books, but he wasn't just signing, he was etching intricate drawings at hyper-speed with a pen into these brown hardcover books people were taking from a huge table. Someone was giving a speech down the hall and people were taking their signed books and heading there. I got curious so I grabbed a book and waited cause wtf was this dude's story. I got to him and he stared me in the eye the entire time he was drawing in my book and didn't look down. It was multiple pages.

He handed it back to me and called me by name and said 'enjoy'. Then he just sort of melted into the floor and the crowd was gone.

The entire area turned dark except for like, a spot light and I opened the book and it was like a whole fucking flipbook of him breaking into my apartment and eating shoes and CDs and then one image of highly-rendered Gravity Falls fanart.

And that's all I remember.

Had weird+unpleasant dreams three nights in a row now

1st was driving semi-lost through desert countryside, picking up a person I once met and their friend as hitchhikers, then getting horrendous vertigo when bespying a cable which stretched out of sight into a cloudless sky

2nd was a purge/battle royale type sitch
I drew a duo's attention before they went to town on a crowd cuz I was the only one there with a gun

3rd, my hair was full of little white bugs and I was disappointing people by skipping social engagements to try comb the bugs out

I had a really weird dream last night that came from nowhere.

So basically, I was in a theatre troop going to see a play and we were all in a bus going to the theatre (which was a hidden stage tucked away between two buildings that both had real theatres. I was also with my usual difficult-to-identify dream-friend, and we started getting this weird feeling. There were a few interesting characters on the bus, a wife who only ever talked about how she would get to see her husband for the first time in forever after the play, and how she was going to bring him roses.

There was also a girl who was about my age, maybe a little younger, who dream-me knew except she wasn't a faceless unidentifiable person like dream-friend is, I could see her easily and she didn't really look like anyone I know irl but I seemed to know her there. She was nice, bubbly, kinda nerdy.

There were a few more people, including the bus driver who had a long dark coat and goggles on, and black gloves covering long fingers. He didn't say a word to us ever, or look at us ever.

And then there was the theatre troop leader, who looked like a tall, skinny, older woman with glasses and a bun and she had a waistcoat and bowtie, and carried a cane.

So anyway, we got to the theatre and I never saw the stage because it was so dark you could only make out the topmost seats as we entered from the top down. Dreamfriend and me were getting bad vibes so we decided to ditch and headed out around back.

Then time sort of skipped and we got the feeling the troop leader was doing something suspicious. We decided to run and found outselves in the suburbs. We spotted the woman who was talking about her husband earlier and she leaped into his outstretched arms, then her dress turned into flowers, and then her skin turned into flowers and burst into flames, leaving only the flowers from the dress in-tact and her husband horrified.

We got the feeling the troup-leader did that and decided we couldn't just run, we had to save the others too. So we tried to go back and spotted some weird animal-thing and my dream-friend yelled.

The animal thing (think raccoon mixed with cat but with one leg too long in the front, a crooked tail and torn ears and a weird, slightly twisted body) turned around and it had the nerdy girl's face from earlier. She told us we have to run and she stumbled away from us when we tried to reach out to her.

We came across several more amalgamation creations stumbling down the street, including this painful-looking horrific bloody mass of flash that crawled with only arms and no feet, and for some reason there were bubbles in the air everywhere and we got the feeling we shouldn't touch them, which was right because I saw someone do just that and their skin melted and then turned into frogs.

So we ran back to the bus, same one, same driver, and said to find the troop leader and he seemed to know what we meant and there was just this huge feeling of dread like we were gonna get turned into weird creatures too, but we had to go back for the others.

The driver took us to this huge ledge that just descended into a dark void of nothing with the troop leader standing over it and making horrific monster-beasts rise from it and take to the air.

Aaand I don't know how it would have ended because at this point I half-woke up and realized I was dreaming.

that sounds super spooky!!!

i dreamed last night that my foot like rotted into cardboard and it was full of moth eggs? except they hatched into moths rather than caterpillars.
i remember thinking, in my dream "I wish this was a dream this is horrible"

Last night.......... it was time to go see the New Spiderman movie, Spiderman Homecoming..... at the Kennedy Center!

The Kennedy Center is this huge building in washington dc (it's right next to the infamous watergate hotel) it has huge theatres for opera and plays and concerts and such

and ENORMOUS HALLWAYS FILLED WITH FLAGS LIKE this one link here click
it's a pretty fancy place with highest-end arts performances

So me and my dad and my sister go to this building.
I've put on this skirt for some reason but it looks nice and it's great and in retrospect i'm very happy about that.
but this building is not the kennedy center. i'm supposed to wait there for an hour while my dad and sis go off to do something

and this place is just like a huge fancy version of a big eating plaza at a mall. It's got like 7 waterslides crisscrossing each other and escalators everywhere and all the food is overpriced! WAY overpriced! I don't buy any. In retrospect this surprises me since a common theme in my dreams is wasting food on overpriced food.
I think this place sucks and i'm heavily considering food but i see the prices and ugh and i take an escalator and it leads to the top of a water slide but there's no down escalator so i have to ride the waterslide while standing up so my skirt doesn't get wet.

it's hard and difficult but i pull it off. i pull off the feat of not getting my skirt wet. i don't pull off my skirt.

finally my dad and sis come back just in time for the movie to start.... but this isn't even the kennedy center! a line has been forming at one of the doors and we all go through and its revealed that the building i was in the whole time is the Kennedy Center Administration Building. duh. should have realized it.
so now that we've gone through the door into kennedy center proper and then go into the door for the movie we watch the movie

some lady stole my seat but whatever.....

then there's a very clever prank played! The people in the movie break character and the fourth wall and they show up and do some sports right there in the theatre
turns out it's all a fancy advertisement for basketball.

despite enjoying all this i have a headache now, as is common with me after watching a concert in the evening (i ALWAYS get a headache) so i'm eager to get home and so i go to the parking lot and start driving home

i'm halfway home, my brakes aren't working very well and i've run at least 2 red lights and i get a text from my dad saying that I forgot to bring them with me. so then i change lane into the wrong side of the road, make a u-turn through 2 lanes of active traffic, drive on the sidewalk of the local college campus, and finally get back to the parking garage of the kennedy center and i let someone else drive

the end

I had a dream where a little goblin girl was being chased around by Oskar from KSBD and his dozens of minions, which were like these white angel things. Me and a bunch of my friends were there, and the minions were forcing us to look for her or they would kill us too.

I was running down the hallway with Oskar right behind me when she was turned the corner ahead of us, running towards us with a minion/friend pair behind her. Since Oskar was right behind me, I stabbed her in the stomach with a spear so he wouldn't kill me. That slowed her down enough that Oskar could grab her and take her into another room, where I could hear her being tortured while he laughed.

I came back later with the police, and all that was left was her little blue leather jacket, covered in splatters of blood and ripped all over. In the center on the back was a huge scorch mark, directly behind where I had stabbed her would have been. I started sobbing and woke up.

Pokemon dreamsong (to the tune of Home on the Range):

"Man, man on the plane,
He'll eat all the 'mons you won't train.
Except, fun'ly 'nough,
He won't eat Jigglypuff,
I guess 'cause it's mostly just brain."

I had a dream that i only half remember, but the half i do remember was the first level of half life one which is a long as hell tram station ride.
I dreamed i was on a tram for 12 minutes and then i woke up.

oats' dream rated 8.1 on IGN

Had a dream where we were in a giant storm and we had to get home. At some point we stopped at an arcade for 15 minutes until a tornado nearly hit the arcade and killed us. Then when we finally made it home and I GET WOKEN UP BY A FLASH FLOOD WARNING ON MY PHONE. (Which sound identical to tornado warning alerts)

i dreamt i ate home fries with cheese sauce. then i started bleeding from my mouth. but i kept eating it because it was just that good.

maybe... it was ketchup...-inducing fries?

had a dream where me and gime and one other person who I forgot started a food truck. Gime was in an apollo cosplay for the entire dream and we made hamburgers. Then a war broke out and we had to destroy a bridge???? to stop the invading armies. for some reason we also had a huge minecraft mansion that the invading armies decided to invade through and gime got super pissed at them and like. screamed at them about fortuna lore until they went home.

that's beautiful

I think anyone would go home after I started reading my notail document, chapter one, all the reasons why they are awful and why you should hate them.

i had a dream last night that i was selling squid-branded merchandise at a fair, squid hats, squid shirts, squid plush toys

WUWU

It was the post apocalyptic young adult novel setting........

In this world, the remnants of society train teenagers to risk their lives searching for clues about the past. Those who discover the most relics and solve the most puzzles are the highest ranking members...

Then, at the end of each year, there's a big party and the top ranked 4 girls and 4 boys are chosen to lead an expedition.... including me, timu, who is the best, who far exceeds the abilities of the other 7 people, due to me being fucking amazing and the most accomplished mage ever!

Just as the party is ending, some invaders attack! amidst the chaos of the party and their surprise infiltration, both sides sustain heavy losses and many of our favorite characters perish in the battle! Fortunately, i cast a spell that both reverses time and also completely destroys the attackers before they even show up.

The chosen eight get ready to leave but a separate problem has arrived.... as we are preparing to board the subway (where i had cast the time spell), distortions from the alternate timeline are disrupting people's movements, causing people to be warped back and forth between where they were in the other timeline and where they are currently, due to our proximity with where i cast the time spell.

I have to singlehandedly use my powers to pull people out of harms way and onto the subway and also push these weird cars that someone left on the subway tracks out of the way so the subway could get moving.

Finally with the effects of the time distortion defeated, and everyone safe on the subway, the expedition can begin!

it is a long journey. Along the way we learn some backstory about my family. My older brother, Blight, was sent on one of the previous expeditions. He was no where near as cool as me, but he was still pretty powerful back in the day. However, he ended up being outranked at the end of that expedition by some other guy. Out of jealousy and rage, Blight became evil, and settled in the faraway land. Ever since, none of the expeditions we sent ever came back.

As the subway travels the 8000 mile journey over, i realize that there is a bug. Not just a like, insect creepy crawly bug, but it is also SPYING ON US! It discovers that it has been discovered and enrages, becoming large and threatening to consume all of us! Fortunately i am very strong and i force it to instead consume an entire city instead. it dies. THe bug as a big monster is kinda like a big walnut with spider legs coming out, and i put the city inside the walnut shell and it kind of walnut crushed it.

Wait! Where did the city come from! It's full of people! Turns out there is still a thriving society of life (besides the one full of only teenagers) and its a bustle of activity! I immediately offer my services to help people, by teleporting them to wherever they want. Unfrotunately some of them don't speak english very well and i teleport some of them to the wrong place. Oh well. THey'll be fine. I also notice that the subway station we stopped at is in a kind of inconvenient location, so i place a Magic Waypoint Totem that people can teleport to at will, so they can access the subway station more easily. However i make a goof, the totem is too close to a pole (that people hang on to so they don't fall when the train is in motion) so people are teleporting in and getting stuck in the pole. The subway boss immediately fires me. I fix the problem but i'm still fired :(

I brought my cat but she's a bit of a hassle to watch over so i bring her to this house of this lady who i met. I enchant all the doors and windows so my cat can't get out, and also as a side effect, no outside magic can penetrate the house. Outside i see this guy who wants to be let in. Apparently its the lady's husband but.... he's clearly disguised. It's my brother! Blight! I easily defeat him in magical combat.

I leave to go investigate why this bustling society has existed all this time and none of the other expeditions of the past (before Blight stopped them all from coming back) ever mentioned this city. Meanwhile on the internet, the lady complains on the internet about how i beat up her husband. Turns out blight is actually her husband, and she let him back inside the house. which means my cat got out. dang it.

I had a dream where all the humans had died off and everyone was a plant person, mushroom person, or two other species that I don't remember.

I had a dream where my front teeth, tongue, and gums were covered in dirty patches mercury/lead. I scraped it off with my finger nail, but then my tongue started bleeding profusely from the scratches.

I had a dream about a little girl who was the heir to the throne of all Ireland. Her father, the king, had been killed and replaced by an imposter, so I (I was either voice in her head or her older cousin, don't remember which, maybe both) told her to find her father. She would know him when she saw him, and know what to do afterwards. (I couldn't tell her directly that her father was dead because her mother was in on the plot and would kill me and her if she heard.)

I led her to her father's corpse, and she knew immediately that the living "father" was an imposter and this one was real. That's what I meant by she would know when she saw him. Now that she had seen her dead father, his ghost could talk to her. He told her to flee to England. That's what I meant by she would know want to do once she saw him.

She went to England, and met the heir of the English throne, who was another girl only a year or two older. They became close friends very quickly, and the Irish girl developed a massive crush on the English one. They eventually got married, and became the two Queens of England and Ireland.

I doubt this was at all historically accurate for any time period.

Had a dream about walking through a desert to find a book. It was a lot of walking and when i finally got to the book, the book wasn't very good.

I had a dream about a cartoon skit called "BBC Ondish". It was a news story about another news channel that was entirely in gibberish (it sounded like a cross between how Korean sounds to nonspeakers and the lego-speak in old lego games). There was a section about Ondish video games. The games were called "Fergus", "Gergus", "Um Cow" (which had a picture of a cow on it), and "Twenty 2018" (which had yet to be released).

At this point, the english-speaking reporters paused the video and said "We asked the Ondish reporters why Um Cow and Twenty 2018 had English names instead of Ondish ones. They started crying morosely and crossed out 2018 and replaced it with 2019, before hurriedly pushing the display offscreen."

I woke myself up by laughing too hard.

Some people have that tip (LifeHack™) where you have to do something complicated or physical to shut off your alarm so that it wakes you up. Well, my noggin has a perfect way to circumvent that: just dream those steps got accomplished!

e2: sometimes less is more

This is like 1/36th of the dream but it was the only thing that i have the clearest memory of, but i was in a huge get together with friends and family in a weird abandoned building where the water sprinklers keep on breaking and one of my friends that i never saw was a computer man without a head.
The long tables had a heckton of food, mostly strange deserts, a huge bowl of really finely minced fruit salad and a vegetable salad that looked exactly the same. Everyone was taking everything and i was too busy fucking with the water sprinkler system to notice, came back to like only half a bowl of weird fruit salad and a singular green biscuit. I was like "well better than nothin" and took a seat with the other kids. Didn't even touch my food before an old lady just hobbled up to me, in long black robes obscuring everything, and just whispered
"lil' bitch"
before limping off again while my mother chastisises me for being surprised. Im so conflicted right now