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kilozombie · 07-01-2018, 05:18 AM

PULSE on 4 | 4102 | 4646, 2641:958

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CYCLES
Recall that Sparrow knocked on the door while was talking to Ma; suppose didn't know we were in the middle of talking. She stands, answers the door, suppose they exchange words quickly. Always struck me as amazing how well they communicated, everything else aside. Could have never expected something like that.

Though they had so much in common, suppose...

Entered, and sat in the spare seat. Was carrying some sort of device; said he'd obtained it from the wreckage of his ship. "I thought it'd been lost, but it was just under a metal panel," he said.

"All this time?" Ma asked. "I thought we'd searched it well."

But they couldn't have. Too distracted. Sparrow landed, crash-landed, in a haze, such a terrible haze, and... terrible events. Death. Hit me too hard to think straight for growths afterwards. Barely manage to keep the thoughts of hatred away even now. But do forgive him, despite it all. "Couldn't have," verbalize, "too distracted with all that happened."

She nodded slowly. "...I don't blame you, Ernal."

"Wasn't really responsible with searching th-through it, anyhow."

Sparrow leaned forth, and pushed the device forth, too. "This should be destroyed, nonetheless."

Asked, "What is it?"

"Religious artifact," Ma said, a little bitter, could tell. "Antaran 'divine gift'. I agree, Sparrow."

Still didn't understand. "What kind of gift? Not sure have ever seen anything like it."

"A gate," Sparrow said. "The, a-ah... what... guided me here, directed me here. They're supposedly a gift of ýƥʚǖώ̍ to us, but to have lead me here with violent intentions makes them... evil. In my eyes, at least."

"Mine, as well," Ma agreed.

My beak moved, had to make these rationalizing words, though was stupid in hindsight to elaborate. "Suppose if it exists, is sort of a gift regardless. Even if a bad gift."

Sparrow glared at me. Not hateful glare, just... must overpower my words. "Deities don't create species, Ernal. Deities don't create gifts. The gifts, and the species, make their own origins. I can see that now."

"But one comes before the other!" I pleaded.

Ma interjected. "This is what they told Sparrow, and me. But there exists our universe without gods, and there exist species without deities. You're asking the right questions, son, but with the wrong presumptions. Existence prior to anything does not imply superiority. No species is as shackled by their god- or gods- as Antarans are, because they know that fact."

Had trouble living with that answer. But now, sitting in my office writing this, suppose it has more truth to it than could have seen before. Mud exists so far from religion, and has left those chains so well. Still tough for me not to wonder where all the belief came from in the first place. Then, mind ticks back to that image of Sparrow thrusting metal into his neck, the center of everything still had, the love of my life, and--

Suppose no matter where it came from, nothing could ever justify that evil machine. We both did as Sparrow recommended, and now the device is nothing more. At the guard house, watching him teach the newest faces, can tell some weight has lifted from him-- and feel we have done the right thing.

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