You Wake Up In A Bar

Again: no time passes. There is no grand break in-between this moment and the last. The sensation you just felt: I promise it's only ghosts. A humble civilian this side of the universe just wanted some assistance, and is thankful you provided it. All you know is that you've got a bar to run, and some dragons to fulfill.

All in all, you've got a lot of patrons now-- Neck Squad 1012 is just one of them, but Nadezhda, Voronezh, Stax, Vebbin and Laren are all quite in need of some attention, one way or another.

First off, music. Music is important.




Next, fixing your attempt at Voronezh's drink. The Unshaken is going to come in some serious handy with this one.








You scoop up his drink into the majestic, rune-encrusted shaker, and begin doing just that-- with some complicated maneuvers on the keypad that just make sense to you, suddenly the Matterhorn Mash has become the much lighter, more airy Matterless Mash.






Things. Things! Things, you've got to find things. Something to hold this big ol' drink you're going to concoct. After a moment's consideration, your eyes land on a peculiarly-colored melon fruit. A brief read of the instructions seem to indicate you have to... press something on it, to make it morph?










You decide to push up a cup onto the melon to maybe get a melon cup? As you do, the fruit begins rapidly transforming-- but the glass cup has disappeared entirely!

In a few short moments, you suddenly have a container perfectly suitable... at a cost.












Well, the truth couldn't hurt that bad.













Well... that isn't quite right. As you recall from reading Starnet, you're the bartender she's fated to find. But you're not sure now is the very best time to tell her. It's so strange having so much dialogue pour out before you can react to it all, truly!

Regardless, the drink is taking form much quicker than you could've expected, and as you plop straws into the respective layers, you feel extremely satisfied with your work.




Fixer gives it one look, rather puzzled.






The heads inspect your concoction carefully, trying to determine who gets what.

Despite the brief hiccup with layer allocation, the dragons seem to be readily enjoying the massive drink, swirling around it with contentment! Ziczhz, especially, is humming and huffing at every sip of that hottest sauce.

As if intentional, Vebbin finishes his mug just as the neck squad gets theirs, and blows some air through his eyes in satisfaction.

















...Ugh. This is really actually getting to you now. You really should tell her, so you give it a go.




However, you're interrupted! It seems that while Nadezhda was speaking, another patron had entered the bar-- limping a bit on their cane, with a head full of sloshing, reddish liquid.

Klaxon takes a seat, gasping a bit under triv breath.










It's relatively true. You don't have a lot of openings to talk, sometimes, with the bar so full. Maybe it'll be easier and slower when there are fewer patrons, but you haven't known that life for a while yet.




An order! An order! An order!

Back in the groove again, it's Greene's time to shine.



Cup status: 2 occupied (Nadezhda's Antimatter Ale, Voronezh's Matterless Mash), 1 dirty (Ashen Corrugible), 1 broken, 5 free
Meloncup status: 1 occupied (Hydra Hydration)
Plate status: 1 occupied (Laren's WIP [1/3] ), 1 dirty (The Sate Catsberry), 2 free
Mug status: 1 dirty (Mulled Again Mulligan), 1 free
Scavenger ability: Unavailable (0/1 uses)
Intrusive ability: Enabled

You've successfully avoided patrons leaving your bar, and you've successfully filled The Cabinet with not only a half-dozen ingredients, but an entry on that polycorp melon!

Author's NotesShow

So, I'd really recommend checking out Ghostwriter, the second side-project to YWUIAB thus far. It's one of my favorite stories I've ever written and it was with heavy heavy assistance from you all, the co-writers of this bizarre universe. It's also from the first-person-perspective of a very... different sort of person than YWUIAB is used to, so there's that.

And it's canon, and the stuff in it will come up later, all that jazz. You can also see the ongoing list of side stories for YWUIAB on the first post. Maybe someday one of you might want to use this setting for a story of your own, and create the canon which forms the basis of this place?

Just remember the YWUNIVERSE's golden rules: if it's possible to put in, put it in. No holes barred. No restrictions. Write things into existence with the simple flick of a wrist, and let them form the basis of everything.