Sixty-four Pixel Colonists

>Izvor, the biologist: Don't be dead.

>Tom: Continue waiting for a good moment.
It'll come. It'll come. It always comes eventually. You discovered after years of anxiety that you're allowed to wait, and you don't need to stress over it.
Besides: the biologist is of higher priority.

As Archivist, you start a small journal, trying to sum up what's been going on so far as you expedite:

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Entry 1
None of this was thought out well.

A decade's training and so much stress and hardship-- thought it would prepare me, thought it would remove the stress from this part. But it just gets worse. Whether a collective decision or one person in particular, coming here now with the resources we had was a mistake. Not only is morale being shaken, but even I, clued-out extraordinaire, feel the tension. We barely got food production to manageable levels. We barely got power production to manageable levels.

Sometimes I feel like the only person not qualified to be here. OK-- maybe Shiva, too. Sorry. But I meant mentally, and at least he seems to have some emotional hold over the situation. I'm having trouble figuring out if what I'm doing cycle-to-cycle is wrong. We're on a search for the biologist, lost on the asteroid, and came across Izvor's arm, or... something near to it. Ice instead of flesh in a suit's arm. Shiva resisted call for us to head back, and I went along with it. Seemed right at the time. Why's he got so much more drive than me?

It's selfish to think, 'is this my fault?', instead of, 'can I fix this?' Every other trained person here seems to have the latter. I feel trending towards the former sometimes. I wish I could call my therapist. I wish I could stop brooding and feeling terrible. I wish I could apologize to Shiva for accusing him of whatever terrible thing I thought he did, but there's this mental block... physical, mental, all manners of painful to try and push past.

Pray tell I'm still alive for the next entry. The way things are out here, I have this nagging worry. Fight or flight response. I'm not a fighter. I'm not a fighter...

>Non-specialist colonist at base named Reman: Have a nightmare.