CHIRAL: SIDE Y

Oi you quiet daft cunt want a slight tussle with me?!
Come on then let's go right now!
Also Dad Zack may I call you daddy? You haven't made anyone the antagonist and you may continue normally with your spam since it will help cure Hunk's alcoholism

Shellgowrath
> We experience the world in a delayed manner and the perfect reason for our behavior is that we are within our infancy
> Our collective existence has lasted for less than a year and these are our stages of infancy wich will be blessed and warped during the appropriate moment
> We can't hear our own voices and existance appears to be excruciating. I despise

I simply cannot top that name.

Scatterbrainzack
> sorry to step on your toes, YUPPERS
> I experience the passage of events differently than you do
> I didn't have any knowledge of your medical experience, nor did any other zack

INPUT AGGREGATOR: hey shalgo
INPUT AGGREGATOR: it aint that actually paternity is a thing im not capable of really internalizin i guess
INPUT AGGREGATOR: its just that it kinda htis one of my anti-reproductive rules and makes me feel that pain that i get to make me do the right things yknow
INPUT AGGREGATOR: like 'gaes' from that one book remember

Show Content

Orderlog
Shellgowrath: Tipsy I really believe that entering that hole and helping Gene from curling figure is the most pressing concern in this moment
Crast Pactian: that hole did not look entirely friendly!
tiptopGipgop: It’s an enigma of a thing. I can’t even make out if it’s some kind of cosmic magic eye poster, or if the stuff in the ‘distance’ actually is stuff.
tiptopGipgop: The Heroes reaaally were a bunch of asses when they designed this, huh.
tiptopGipgop: Also, definitely no, I am not entering that hole, whether it’s to defend my friend from a curling figure of death or not.
Shellgowrath: What a shameful display
Shellgowrath: Numbers the current situation is that Gene had a fever dream and unintentionally primed a grenade and is now suffering from deafness and shrapnel injuries from said grenade
1234567890: c4n7 h34r 90u
Crast Pactian: could we hold on a moment for numbers?
Shellgowrath: The reason why we act in such manners is because our collective existences have lasted for less than a year and we are currently in our stages of infancy
1234567890: 57111 c4n7 h34r 90u
tiptopGipgop: That’s interesting.
tiptopGipgop: One of the first Zacks asked us all a trivia question from a time on Earth. I can’t recall anything in this simulation ever relating to that question, so I can’t imagine how exactly you all experience… life.
Shellgowrath: I can't hear my own voice and I would like to know how I may upload a form of picture of myself
1234567890: n0p3 57111 n07h1n6 p13453 570p
Hunk Chudfest: itt sss alttitlebtid eassy toyoug tottad aske levyds for a recorrdfing progtram
Levyyts: Happy to oblige
Levyyts: In exchange for some favors
Levyyts: Will create list
Shellgowrath: Is it possible for me to play music to alleviate the pain and confusion we currently feel?
1234567890: 57111 n0 h34r1n6 dud3
EXA: zzz
EXA: tune
EXA: out
YUPPERS: some TUNES would not go UNAPPRECIATED in these UNCERTAIN TIMES.
YUPPERS: i am currently witnessing TG and her BANG-UP TRIAGE.
tiptopGipgop: Cripes is breathing okay, and talking a little. I think she’s shell-shocked.
Shellgowrath: I shall properly behave when my period of infacy has stopped during the appropriate time period
1234567890: 4u6h
godzack: well yknow
godzack: im not the boss of you
godzack: all of you are just throwin out inputs from wherever
godzack: could be young could be old ;)
Shellgowrath: Existance seems to be excruciating. I despise
1234567890: 90ure 3xcruc1471n6 :9
Crast Pactian: numbers, please!! show a little tact!
Scatterbrainzack: sorry to step on your toes, YUPPERS
Scatterbrainzack: I experience the passage of events differently than you do
YUPPERS: that is GREAT
YUPPERS: and GRAND
YUPPERS: TIME SHENANIGANS ARE THE GREATEST OF SHENANIGANS.
Scatterbrainzack: I didn't have any knowledge of your medical experience, nor did any other zack
Levyyts: Mostly circumstantial anyhow
Levyyts: And admittedly
Levyyts: Not to be counted out
Levyyts: But largely a way to compete with 1234567890.
1234567890: 74r5 15 0k49
godzack: hold on all those uh
godzack: ye gimme a sec lmao
godzack: my buddy boy shellgoy erased his inputs n reposted em so im gonna just spit em out again for you
Shellgowrath: We experience the world in a delayed manner and the perfect reason for our behavior is that we are within our infancy
Shellgowrath: Our collective existence has lasted for less than a year and these are our stages of infancy wich will be blessed and warped during the appropriate moment
Shellgowrath: We can't hear our own voices and existence appears to be excruciating. I despise
tiptopGipgop: So you control what messages get through?
godzack: ok i mean im the conduit but
godzack: a wire doesnt make conscious choice if it lets electricity through yknow
godzack: peeps input and i aggregate
godzack: i got no power or control i just do whats gotta be done
YUPPERS: what makes your WORLD so DELAYED, exactly
YUPPERS: is it some SECRET MECHANISM? an UNHEARD-OF GAME DIARY?
Crast Pactian: it does seem as if the zack posts come in… bursts, of a sort.
Levyyts: A backlog of inputs aggregated
Levyyts: Spit out after
godzack: thats the spice ;)

>Yuptam McCrombits
>Derse's Nineteenth Strongest Guy
>And Haircare Tycoon

"H-Hey," you mumble weakly, "Y-Yuptam."

And thus, breaking the temporary chain of REAL NAMES whose FIRST NAME is a functional English word, Yuptam McCrombits, Nineteenth Strongest Dersite gives you the thumbity thibbity thumbs up, as is fucking Customary.



He was the NINETEENTH STRONGEST GUY back home, and while nobody particularly gave him such an award, he was quick to adopt it, along with many of his other habits and talents. Yuptam held a job as a performer in one of the Jester Circuits for several years, even though he was never qualified as a jester in the slightest. He owned a hair-care tycoon for over a decade without having a single strand of hair on his Carapacian skull, selling to more Carapacians without hair. He got a job working at the newspaper, and would encode images of himself in the justified text-- all without ever visiting the office.

Yuptam was a MAGIC MAN, by all means, and yet he never put his talents to even a vaguely useful purpose. Never once did his jokes or mannerisms elicit a laugh, yet he was always befuddlingly capable of the most odd and unassuming actions, as well as- universally- the NINETEENTH STRONGEST.



Your vision clears slightly as Tipsy kneels beside you, placing her hand on your shoulder, feeling your body for wounds, and checking your pulse through your thick carapace. Words still escape your damaged ears, but you can make out that, at the least, she's not telling you to move around.

So you sit still, breathing slowly, and wait for the words to start making sense.

"...Gene...? We have... better... and Oats... grenade?... shell..."

Seems the aural damage isn't permanent, or at the very least not always going to be as bad as being deaf.