CHIRAL: SIDE Y

Zack
> Oh brother, where are you?
> I must save people from being brutally erased from existance
> Yet i have to follow quite vague and unhelpful orders from the INPUT AGGREGATOR wich by the way is a machine that aggregates input
> Riddle Zack i thank you for insulting me in such poetic manner
> But now my critters despite the fact that you're all just glorified pieces of code
> I love y'all unequally with 1234567890 being my favorite, Violent Zack's favorite! And if any of you do as much as lay a finger on numbers i promise you pain without end

/* Given That Our Orders
Are How We Communicate
Erasure Sounds Bad */

If I Got Some Arms
They Would Be Very Lonely
They'd Have No Body

Now, Bad Puns Aside
The Orders Thing is Not Good
You Have Any Ideas?

Zack
> ‘crunches a tootsie pop’ is not a violent euphemism, it was meant literally
> dance to the beat of your own drum
> you guys should try to win a game

INPUT
> GAME
> ORDERS
> Delete all prior orders (???)

Your INPUT AGGREGATOR gets to work hurriedly typing and doing shit on the ORDERLOG.

Halfway through, you hit CHIRAL to go to the menu, then select ORDERS again, bringing you to the exact same screen. Worth a shot, at least. You still input the command, and it doesn't seem to have been completely off-target.

OrderlogShow

Zack: ‘crunches a tootsie pop’ is not a violent euphemism, it was meant literally
Crast Pactian: unfortunately, i don’t believe i understand what a tootsie pop is.
tiptopGipgop: It’s a form of currency, I’m fairly sure.
tiptopGipgop: Another human thing.
Zack: dance to the beat of your own drum
Zack: you guys should try to win a game
Hunk Chudfest: wngging tigess you a prizse but ywe dothat all tht time
Hunk Chudfest: it fgodnest escape usf oturom tohte game or anythinhg :(
1234567890: 934h wh47 hunk 15 7r91n6 70 549 15 7h47 w1nn1n6 15 4 7h1n6 w3 d0 4 107
YUPPERS: i think what NUMBERS is TRYING TO SAY is that WINNING is a THING WE DO A LOT
Crast Pactian: i think what YUPPERS is trying to say is that winning is a thing we do a lot.
Zack: If I Got Some Arms
Zack: They Would Be Very Lonely
Zack: They'd Have No Body
EXA: eheheh
YUPPERS: who is to say ARMS must be paired with BODY??
YUPPERS: that seems PRESUMPTUOUS.
YUPPERS: LOVE IS LOVE.
1234567890: 1 d0n7 7h1nk 7h475 wh47 24ck m34n7
Zack: Now, Bad Puns Aside
Zack: The Orders Thing is Not Good
Zack: You Have Any Ideas?
tiptopGipgop: Here’s a question for you real quick, Zack.
tiptopGipgop: Do you, um… do any of you actually have bodies? Maybe with arms? In whatever dimension you’re in?
Hunk Chudfest: jsust dont’t turn gong cumpuslvie rordders and weeel bee okay
Crast Pactian: i think we can all agree that being compelled to do things against our will would be undesirable.
EXA: like mister lil tars
EXA: taaars the faaars
EXA: far out.
Crast Pactian: perhaps there is some way to lock the setting on ‘off’ as it stands?
Crast Pactian: so that there is no possibility that you begin getting us to do things against our will.
Zack: Delete all prior orders
tiptopGipgop: Oh, you’re trying to…
tiptopGipgop: Thank you, first of all.
tiptopGipgop: Second of all, you have to put it in all-capitals, alone, just ‘CEASE ALL ACTIONS’.
tiptopGipgop: Though since you’re at a green terminal, I don’t know if it’ll cease all green actions, or everyone’s.
Crast Pactian: it is worth a shot, i suppose!
1234567890: un1355 17 570p5 4c710n5 11k3 8r347h1n6
1234567890: “570P 411 4C710N5” 50und5 f0r3b0d1n6
Zack: Oh brother, where are you?
tiptopGipgop: Wait, whose brother?
Crast Pactian: hum.
Zack: I must save people from being brutally erased from existance
Zack: Yet i have to follow quite vague and unhelpful orders from the INPUT AGGREGATOR which by the way is a machine that aggregates input
YUPPERS: YES, that was our GUESS.
YUPPERS: what else might an INPUT AGGREGATOR possibly do?
Zack: Riddle Zack i thank you for insulting me in such poetic manner
1234567890: 15 7h47 4n 1n5u17 0r 4n07h3r 7hr347?
Crast Pactian: i still will argue in favor of the name ‘three line poem Zack’.
tiptopGipgop: Is this really the appropriate time to interrupt Zack’s monologue?
Zack: But now my critters despite the fact that you're all just glorified pieces of code
Zack: I love y'all unequally with 1234567890 being my favorite, Violent Zack's favorite! And if any of you do as much as lay a finger on numbers i promise you pain without end
1234567890: 0H N0
1234567890: 0H M4N “F4V0R173” 50UND5 11K3 50M3 K1ND 0F 1N51NU4710N 7H47 90U W4N7 70 HUR7 M3 7H3 84DD357
Crast Pactian: or perhaps violent zack is simply trying to make friends of us in a very roundabout manner.
Crast Pactian: i promise you, violent zack, despite other people’s occasional jab at his method of typing, we are all friends with numbers. we are all friends with each other.
EXA: iddd looove to see some
EXA: extra-extra-extra action
EXA: yknow
EXA: we’re me-e-eaningless
EXA: let’s make it r-i-i-i-de
tiptopGipgop: No!
tiptopGipgop: Please, let’s not make it ride.
tiptopGipgop: Let’s cool shit DOWN. That’s what we should universally be doing here.
cripesalmighty: Been gone a moment, anyone wanna care to kinda-sorta inform me of what absolute insanity is going on?!!! Why are there multiple Zacks now?! COULD THIS SITUATION ACTUALLY GET ANY MORE ABSURD AND BAD.

Insert Name (Crast Pactian)
> Remember name
> Hawaiian Coffee, the 2nd

>Gene, Memory Time
>This Incredibly Rad Guy
>Is Named Carl C. Queue

Right, of course. That white-carapaced gent is Queue C. Coffee, inheritor of the Prospitian Hawaiian Coffee Company.


"Hey, Queue," you call out. He gives you the customary thumbs-up obviously.

Back on Prospit, he was very vehement in his love for all varieties of coffee and coffee accessories-- even though all the heroes of Prospit were non-human, and actually would have quickly had a heart attack if they ingested any coffee, Hawaiian or otherwise. Still, his somewhat sizable fortune went to an incredibly good use.

In his day, he was a philanthropist, and as the populations of Derse and Prospit began to mingle and become friends, he was as excited as you and your pals to cross the cultural gap.

Goddamnit you know all that, why did you go over it again in your head.

"Hello again, Gene. I was just preparing those snacks like I was talking about. Sour candy and soda, classic bad-mood foods."

It's tough to stay frustrated around Queue.



"Thanks, uh. Yeah." You nod weakly. "I just barely worked up the ability to even step outside, so...! Maybe gimme a minute."

Queue nods slowly. "Take your time."

You're Gene, and you're taking your time. Also, your earpiece is blowing the fuck up, so you shoot a quick message to try and get a grip on the situation.