The Ballad of Adler Young, Canto 2.5

(Not to derogate other posters suggestions but I really gotta ask: People, between all that's already happening, do you really feel the plot would benefit from getting more cluttered than it already is with random vortexes and sudden Grues ?)

(yeah, I should limit suggestions to character actions eg look at, pick up, examine, steal, pillage, crotch chop.)

>Ixie: Warn Adler that the jig is up
Ixie's news, be dire

"Sire, the Grand Marshal has put out a Faerie-Wide Alert for thy arrest," the Ixie informed me. "By order of the Queen."

"WHA??" I asked, nervously glancing around the room. "The Marshal? The Queen? But why? Do they know I'm here?"

"Mayhap, or mayhap not," the Ixie shrugged. "I knew thou wert here. Tis likely my sisters know as well, and though the Marshal scorns us, the Queen doth make use of our services. So thou mightest be in peril more immediate than thou thinkest. Or not."

"Aren't you all my daughters?" I asked, bewildered. "What happened to familial loyalty? How could you inform against your own father?"

"Not I, Sire," the Ixie insisted. "But our motto is ever 'Business cometh first.' The Queen payeth us well. Thou payest us nought."

I stared at her in disappointed astonishment for a moment.

"The Sisterhood payeth us even better," she added, in what sounded like a reassuring tone.

Adler, try using elfmind to determine what Meadow is trying to signal you.
Adler > see meadow again out the window, she looks panicked. You get a elf mind message but its not clear .. something in the lab is blocking elf mind

"Maybe this is what Meadow was trying to tell me," I theorized as I dashed to the window. I could still see her atop the building across the way. She waved and pointed at something and ducked low behind the parapet. I tried to pick up a message via Elfmind, but it was garbled and unclear. I concentrated harder but still could make no sense of the jumbled mental noise I was picking up.

"I can't make out what she's trying to tell me," I complained aloud.

"Something here is interfering with Elfmind," the Ixie explained. "I could not get thy attention til I spoke aloud, though I had been here some considerable time before that."

"Probably some anti-espionage measures put in place by the SALVS," I theorized. "Vulpitanians certainly are paranoid. You wouldn't happen to know anything about their experiments, would you?"

She shook her head regretfully.

do Vulpitanians really like rhubarb?
why not mutter a few chosen words ('King Estmere', 'research', 'the plan') in their ears to make them dream about their research and see what appear on the water ?
>As it turns out, breaking that tablet is pretty much the absolute worst possible thing that you could have done.

"Hmm, well, Rotnev said 'rhubarb' a moment ago, which means they are starting to wake up, so I don't have much time," I muttered, thinking aloud. "In this state they may be highly suggestible .. I might be able to get them to talk about their research .. or .. OF COURSE! Estvan, you genius! I can see their dreams in that scrying bowl which he set between them!"



I rushed into the other room and flopped onto the floor next to the slumbering SALVs.

"The Plan dictates regarding King Estmere's fertility .." I whispered.

The image in the bowl showed Rotnev and Nexivydah dancing & juggling test tubes.

"The Plan," I whispered.

Dream-Rotnev picked up the Old Crow tablet and broke it. A glowing crystal floated out from the shards of pottery. Rotnev took this crystal and seemed to feed it to a furry object that looked like a Scuti. Then he and Nexivydah danced some more, amid flashes of lightning. When they began making out, I got up and hurried back into the laboratory.

Adler > the old crow tablet had a fancy magical gem in it. pick it up and put it elfventory.

I sifted through the rubble of the broken plaque, and sure enough: I found an odd, dull-colored gem. It was fairly pulsating with magickal energy.

"What is it?" the Ixie asked.

"I have no idea, but it seems to be crucial to the Vulpitanians' Plan." I tucked the gem into a safe place way in the back of my Elfintory, and then surveyed the room once more. "Time to get going, before the Marshal's men get here."

Adler > Grab the jar containing the scuti Alice & Mara might want to talk to it
>Grab the scuti and scram. Maybe hearing what it saw lets you to figure out a crucial step in the experiment.
Jar scuti, start moving around, as if it were trying to say something.
give the scuti jar to mara & alice

My attention was diverted by a glassy clinking sound, and I noticed the small Scuti writhing furiously in its jar.

"That thing has probably seen everything these foxes were up to," I theorized. "Alice and Mara should be able to talk to it and find out what it knows."



I scooped up the jar and tucked it under my arm, then made my way quickly & quietly to the stairs, out of the SALVs' apartment.

>Jig: Be mostly up.

As soon as I stepped out into the street, a pair of burly constables grabbed me and handcuffed my arms behind my back. They took the Scuti jar and handed it to Marshal Theronmyathus.

"What vile monster is this?" the Marshal croaked. "It's evidence of some nefarious crime, I'm sure. Prince Adler, you are under arrest, by order of the Queen. Let the record show that you were apprehended while exiting the Vulpitanian dignitaries' quarters. By Royal decree, you have the right to have a Floozy present during proceedings up to and including the conclusion of your trial. If you do not have a Floozy, one will be appointed to you by the Crown."

"Say nothing, Sire," the Ixie whispered in my Elfmind. "This problem shall be taken care of."

>Guards arresting Adler: Be very, very unprofessional in one way or another. One keeps using Adler as a shoulder to cry on for his personal problems, and the other keeps gushing about his passion for model ships.

Guards > Throw adler onto his face in a dirty dungeon cell filled with spiders!

>Adler: Request Meadow as your Floozy.
>Meadow: Be put into Floozy outfit. Tell Adler what you were trying to tell him earlier.
>Adler: Plot escape with Meadow.
>Meadow: Know all the escape tunnels from the dunjons.

Oh, oh, I know what's next, vigorous interrogation!

Oh, oh, I know what's next, vigorous interrogation!

by a frowning net casting spider elf, muahahahaha!

(Red Caps) Discuss where to have lunch after leaving off the prisoner.
(Red Caps) Since there's one carnivore, and one herbivore, cheerfully disagree.
(HSH Prince Adler) Be reminded you haven't had anything to eat in a bit.
(Dunjon Cell) Be occupied. Sort of.
(Skeleton on cell bench) Be in a thinking posture.
(HSH Prince Adler) Be tossed rather roughly into the cell.
(Dunjon Cell) Be closed. Loudly. And hard enough to collapse the skeleton.
(HSH Prince Adler) Despair for a brief period of time.
(HSH Prince Adler) Remember who you are, and that it is un-Elfly to cry.
(Time) Pass. Slowly. Build stuff with the skeleton.
(Court-appointed Floozie, somewhat familiar) Appear, and cheerfully announce status.
(Court-appointed Floozie) Wear a wig and a silk gown and own the look
(Self-appointed Floozie, with suspicious accent) Appear, and dispute who is the Floozie In Charge.
(HSH Prince Adler) Despair, again.
(Ixie) Sneak in while the Floozies squabble

Adler, be put in a holding cell.
Holding cell opposite to Adler's, hold a very chatty prisoner.
Prisoner, Keep trying to have a conversation with Adler. Don't realize just how suspicious you appear.
The Marshal and the Sergeant, pull a good watchman/bad watchman interrogation on Adler. Do not be particularly successful, partially due to your choice of roles.

Adler: "So I've been captured... All according to plan!"

>Get a piece of vital information.

Adler: Request Meadow as your Floozy.
>Guards arresting Adler: Be very, very unprofessional in one way or another. One keeps using Adler as a shoulder to cry on for his personal problems, and the other keeps gushing about his passion for model ships.
(Red Caps) Discuss where to have lunch after leaving off the prisoner.

"I want Meadow Grainmaster to serve as my official Floozy during these proceedings," I shouted as the Marshal and the Sergeant hurried off ahead of us. Then, as the constables manhandled me toward the Detention Center, I protested: "Hold on a second! What exactly am I being charged with?"


"Fuma spray me if I know, laddie," the wolf constable replied. "Tis at the Queen's orders, so could be anything. Did ye give her an odd look, or leave a chamberpot in the wrong place? Did ye fail tae wish her a bonnie mornin' in the proper tone o' voice? Ye never can tell wi' femmes. Me own Sally holds me responsible every time there's cloudy weather. It's got so I'm scared to say anythin' at hoome."

"You think that's rough?" the bull rumbled. "You should try building a miniature three-masted schooner inside a wine bottle - after you didn't even get to drink the wine! Speaking of which, Nero, where do you want to go for breakfast after we drop this little perp off?"

"I dinnae, Angus, how aboot that Antglade-style barbecue stand?"

"They don't have decent salads there," the bull objected. "How about the Green House?"

"Bah, we went there last time," the wolf scoffed. "Barrin' the barbaric flavour and the havoc it wrought upon me digestion, those shrub-run places have such beastly slow service!"

This debate went on for the duration of our walk, cruelly reminding me that it was early morning by now, and had been quite some time since I last ate.

Guards > Throw adler onto his face in a dirty dungeon cell filled with spiders!
(HSH Prince Adler) Despair for a brief period of time.
Adler, be put in a holding cell.
Holding cell opposite to Adler's, hold a very chatty prisoner.
Prisoner, Keep trying to have a conversation with Adler. Don't realize just how suspicious you appear.

When we arrived at the Detention Center, the constables unfastened my manacles and shoved me into a holding cell. Then they went away, still debating where to go for breakfast. I dejectedly surveyed my surroundings. There was a bench chained to the wall, with a chamberpot and an assortment of cobwebs under it. I sat down on the bench and worriedly contemplated my situation.



"Pssst, hey you, hey fella," a rat in the cell opposite whispered. "What are you in for?"

"I'm not really sure," I answered mournfully.

"Aw come on, buddy, you can confide in me. Us Unseelie gotta stick together, see?"

"I was caught snooping around where I shouldn't be, I guess," I admitted. "But my intentions were good."

"I hear ya," the rat commisserated. "This goody-goody tyranny just ain't fair, see? What do skunks know about life on the street? No offense. That lowfolk was already mostly eaten when I got there! Elves don't lie, see?"

Oh, oh, I know what's next, vigorous interrogation!
The Marshal and the Sergeant, pull a good watchman/bad watchman interrogation on Adler. Do not be particularly successful, partially due to your choice of roles.
Adler: "So I've been captured... All according to plan!"

I was somewhat relieved when Marshal Theronmyathus and Sergeant Avogadro strode up to my cell, interrupting this conversation. The Marshal unlocked the door and Avogadro rushed in, jabbing his finger at me angrily.



"I've had it with you, Bastard!" the mole squeaked furiously. "Are you gonna tell us what you were up to in the SALVs' apartment, or do I have to get rough?"

"Er, should you be questioning me without my Floozy present?" I asked nervously. "Where is Meadow?"

"Now, now, Sergeant," Theronmyathus croaked as he tugged Avogadro away from me. "The Prince has rights, and it would not do for us to go violating them. Sorry about this, Your Highness. He gets excited sometimes. Cares passionately about justice, you know. Anyway, we came to inform you that your Floozy - or should I say Floozies - are here. You are only entitled to one, so you'll have to clear up this confusion before we can proceed."

"Don't dawdle about it," Avogadro growled irritably.

Floozie, somewhat familiar) Appear, and cheerfully announce status.
Floozie, with suspicious accent) Appear, and dispute who is the Floozie In Charge.

Four femmes lined up in the corridor outside my cell.

"When I heard that Cute Prince Adler was in trouble, I just knew he needed me," Doris Saltstick sighed dreamily. "I will help him through this time of adversity."

"When did you get back from Caer Adland?" Meadow sneered. "I'm the one currently serving as Adler's office Floozy, I understand his present situation better than anyone else here, and besides, it's me that he has asked for by name."

"Hudalaleigh!" the scantly-clad wolfess exclaimed. "Sure an' the Wolf Queen fights fer justice, so I'll wrestle the lot of ye for the right to serve as Adler's Floozy! One at a time or all together, it matters not. Best three falls out o' four wins."

"I am Prince Right Hand Adler's Court-Appointed Floozy," the smartly-dressed ungulate stated drily. "The rest of you might as well go home."

(Ixie) Sneak in while the Floozies squabble
>Get a piece of vital information.

"Quickly, Sire, while they're all distracted," an Ixie whispered in my Elfmind. "Only one of yon Floozies is in league with the Sisterhood, so choose carefully. Also, if thou hast anything in thine Elfintory which thou'dst prefer the Marshal not to find, best give it to me now and I'll smuggle it away for safekeeping."

>Audience: Roll on floor laughing at "Wolf Queen". :D
>Adler: Regard "Wolf Queen" rather dubiously.
>Chatty Rat: Volunteer to take any leftover Floozies.
>Adler: Do a quick Elfintory check for contraband.

> ah i would say give the ixie the booze raven mad gave you but the gem is more important
> actually drink that peach brandy right now. all in one go

Adler > ask the 3 other floosies who sent them

>Well, obviously you should choose Meadow since she is the one trenched the deepest in your dark web of deception and conspiracy.
>However, you've had it rough and could use some mischief to cheer yourself up. Why not make a show of being "indecisive" just to rile the four of them up. If they aren't kicking and strangling each other within five minutes, you aren't doing it right.

or

>Just to be difficult and beat the system, choose the Chatty Rat to be your floozy instead of any of the presented choices.

Hm, this is a tough choice...
>The Wolf Queen reminds you suspiciously of certain someone. While she (?) might be fun, she's as likely to cause more mischief as help you clear your good name.
>Meadow is the most loyal to you, but she's very, very short. What would people think!?
>Doris is sweet and harmless, but then again she's sweet and harmless. Could she be the secret sisterhood agent? Nobody would suspect her...
>The ungulate has a no-nonsense attitude and is a snappy dresser. Maybe you could get acquainted better if you chose her?

>Let's follow Estemere's example and pick the ungulate. Even if she's not with the Sisterhood she at least seems competent (besides Adler should limit how much in gratitude he is to them - their support comes with demands).

>Your elfintory has all kinds of useless junk, but at least get rid of the Old Crow gem.

>Audience: Roll on floor laughing at "Wolf Queen". :D

I only read through the first four books yet (I'm a rather slow reader), so I really have not much idea as to who the wolf queen is... But I want to know more!

SpoilerShow

I'm curious: Does she normally carry Estvan's walking stick and speaks with an Irish accent?

Floozies, start bickering.
Doris and the court appointed floozie, try to outfloozy one another. Doris, prove to be remarkably (or possibly suspiciously) court competent.
The Wolf and the Meadow, clash yourselves, but rather more physically.
All-out floozy brawl, begin.
Rat, make a bunch of highly inappropriate cheers and comments.

Sergeant, come in at the moment when the Wolf is giving Adler a really strong hug (which prevents him from making any sounds in protest) and the other three floozies are busy with each other (and the rat). Believe that she's Adler's choice and go inform the Marshal.

>Audience: Roll on floor laughing at "Wolf Queen". :D

I only read through the first four books yet (I'm a rather slow reader), so I really have not much idea as to who the wolf queen is... But I want to know more!

SpoilerShow

I'm curious: Does she normally carry Estvan's walking stick and speaks with an Irish accent?

Yes, yes I can say they do.

...Except ,she's generaly a he, a fox and called Estvan

>Pretty sure the doe, whatsherface, Doris, work for the sisterhood but jsut for quicks, name Avogadro your floozy.

>Let's follow Estemere's example and pick the ungulate. Even if she's not with the Sisterhood she at least seems competent (besides Adler should limit how much in gratitude he is to them - their support comes with demands).

Except she's the COURT apointed floozy and right now since it meeans your brother is shirking his duty, that means she's likely sent by the queen.

Oh i know
>Hire them as a team ! Hire the smartly dressed one at the condition she hires the others on your behalf. They will be Addler's angels.

(hahaha! look how cute and tiny meadow looks)
Meadow > punch out the rat

Avogadro & Theronmyathus > Duck out from the floozy brawl, wait for them to finish. last one standing wins

Adler > be a little bemused by all this and try to calm the situation

(Thompson's Gazelle) Realize this situation calls for backup.
(Thomson's Gazelle) Attempt to assist your twin sister.
(Thomson's Gazelle) Confuse the situation further by trying to clarify your sister's statements, and fail.
(Meadow) Ask the "Wolf Queen" rather pointedly where Sun-and-Moon is.

[EDIT, courtesy of a friend] ("Wolf Queen") "Bedad, in the sky as always."

(Meadow) Don't get an answer, largely because Ratso is making assorted comments about you.
("Wolf Queen") Come to the defence of Meadow, and do magickal things to Ratso.
(All) Wince, but all agree that the "Wolf Queen" is indeed meting out justice.
(Doris) Be told, firmly, by the Thompson's Gazelle (and confusedly by the Thomson's Gazelle), that you are not to be Cute Prince Adler's Floozie.
(Doris) Turn on the water works. Loudly.
(Adler) Consider turning over the gem. Weigh whether or not slipping it to the ixie is Seelie.
(Adler) Do break out the jug of [Three and a Half], and give it to the "Wolf Queen"
(Chaos) Descend with a vengeance once the "Wolf Queen" shares out the bounty.
(Thompson's Gazelle) Be the only one (Adler and Ratso included) not drinking.
(Thompson's Gazelle) Take charge.
(Thompson's Gazelle) Notice the Ixie.
(Ixie) Notice the Thompson's Gazelle noticing you.
(Ixie) Take counter-measures that you find funny.
(Thompson's Gazelle) Take counter-measures that the Ixie doesn't find funny.

(Thompson's Gazelle) Realize this situation calls for backup.

To be precise, backup is what the situation calls for.

(Thompson's Gazelle) Realize this situation calls for backup.

To be precise, backup is what the situation calls for.

To be perfectly Herge-ian, the response should be:

"To be precise, this uncalled for situation has my backup."

Wolf Queen, do NOT be Estvan. Instead, be somebody else, pretending to be Estvan, pretending to be the Wolf Queen.

I take it that the Court-appointed floozie's name is "Thomson"? She's clearly not a Thomson's gazelle by species (the horns and facial markings are a clear giveaway).

>Adler: Do a quick Elfintory check for contraband.
> ah i would say give the ixie the booze raven mad gave you but the gem is more important
> actually drink that brandy right now. all in one go
>Your elfintory has all kinds of useless junk, but at least get rid of the Old Crow gem.
(Adler) Consider turning over the gem. Weigh whether or not slipping it to the ixie is Seelie.

I rummaged around in my Elfintory, pulling out the jug of brandy Ravenmad had given me in order to reach smaller items that had slipped behind it.

"Quickly, Sire, quickly," the Ixie urged.



"This fake Vulpitanian medal & monocle, and this gem from the SALVs' laboratory are probably the most incriminating items," I thought at her with Elfmind.

"By the Lady, Sire, I cannot carry all that," the Ixie protested. "Unlike thee, I have no Elfintory, and needs must grapple objects in my arms. I can take but one. Choose! Our time is short!"

I hastily handed her the gem, and stuffed the other items back into Elfintory. She grasped the gem firmly, and vanished. I turned my attention back to the Floozies, who were still squabbling amongst themselves.

>Hire them as a team ! Hire the smartly dressed one at the condition she hires the others on your behalf.

"Why can't I hire you all as a team?" I asked.

"You're only entitled to one!" Avogadro's voice resounded irritably from down the hall, where I supposed he and the Marshal were waiting.

"The mole speaks the truth, Highness," the smartly-dressed ungulate remarked. "Royal Statute A-56 states that a noble defendant is entitled to a Floozy. Singular. Not a harem."

>Chatty Rat: Volunteer to take any leftover Floozies.
Rat, make a bunch of highly inappropriate cheers and comments.

"Hey pal, I'll take one of the extras if you're not usin' her," the rat in the other cell interrupted. "Doesn't matter which. I think me and the mousie would get along just swell. Or if Wolfie wants to wrestle, I'm game."

"Sir, the regulation applies to noble defendants," the ungulate stated. "Are you noble?"

"Not in any sense of the word," the rat glumly admitted. "Elves don't lie, see."

>Well, obviously you should choose Meadow since she is the one trenched the deepest in your dark web of deception and conspiracy.
>Meadow is the most loyal to you, but she's very, very short.

"Well, ladies, I'm sorry you all wasted your time coming down here," I sighed. "But Meadow is the only one whom I actually requested."



Suddenly Meadow squeaked and flinched. She reached into her Elfintory and fumbled out a buzzing, flashing glass orb.

"Yes? Hello?" she said to the orb as she held it up in front of her face. "Who is this? How did you get this scry? What? She WHAT?? Oh dear, oh dear. Fuma's Mercy! I'm sorry, Adler, but I, uh, I've really got to take this."

Everyone watched silently as Meadow hurried out of the Detention Center.

"It appears, Highness, that you will have to settle for your second choice," the ungulate observed.

Why not make a show of being "indecisive" just to rile the four of them up.
choose the Chatty Rat to be your floozy instead
name Avogadro your floozy.

I glowered at the remaining three and momentarily entertained perverse (almost Unseelie) fantasies of deliberately antagonizing them. Perhaps I should nominate Sergeant Avogadro or the reprehensible rat across the hall to serve as my Floozy, just to show them that I could CHOOSE rather than settle for an option that was quite apparently being forced upon me.

>Adler: Regard "Wolf Queen" rather dubiously.
Adler > ask the 3 other floosies who sent them
>The Wolf Queen reminds you suspiciously of certain someone. While she (?) might be fun, she's as likely to cause more mischief as help you
Ask the "Wolf Queen" rather pointedly where Sun-and-Moon is.
be somebody else, pretending to be Estvan, pretending to be the Wolf Queen.

"Wolf Queen," I asked the one in the skimpy armor. "Who sent you here?"

"Begorrah," she replied. "Sure and nobody sent me at all, at all. The Wolf Queen fights fer Justice and goes where she's needed."

"The Wolf Queen I've read of in legends carried a formidable weapon called 'Sun-and-Moon.' Where is it?"

"Sure and not every situation calls fer hackin' and slashin', me boyo," the Wolf Queen giggled. "Might ye be believin' it's at the cleaners?"

"Please tell me you're not Estvan Silverbrush," I thought at her in Elfmind.

"That I cannot tell ye, for elves do not lie," she replied. "Ach, there's no need to be makin' such faces. Ye cut such a foine figure as SALV Relda Fauxfox, sure'n I decided to get into the act an' adopt a disguise meself. And when I saw that you were in need of legal advice, well, I decided to come and render me services."

"Do you know anything about Imperial legal proceedings?" I asked.

"Hudalaleigh, lad. Me japes an' shenanigans have served me well enough for centuries upon centuries."

"Are you quite all right, Highness?" the ungulate asked me. "You suddenly look quite ill."

>Doris is sweet and harmless, but then again she's sweet and harmless. Could she be the secret sisterhood agent?
>The ungulate has a no-nonsense attitude and is a snappy dresser. Maybe you could get acquainted better if you chose her?
Floozies, start bickering.
Doris and the court appointed floozie, try to outfloozy one another.
she's the COURT apointed floozy and right now since it means your brother is shirking his duty, that means she's likely sent by the queen.
(Doris) Be told, firmly, by the Thompson's Gazelle that you are not to be Cute Prince Adler's Floozie.

"He's just worried about his case," Doris piped up before I could respond. "But poor little Cute Prince Adler need not fret. I'll just get a magistrate to certify a Writ of Corpus Delecti and we'll be out of here by lunchtime."

"You realize there's no such thing, right?" the ungulate scoffed. "Did you get your legal training from old issues of Jane, the Lowfolk Femme?"

"It's required reading for all Palace Floozies," Doris sniffed, crestfallen.

"Who sent you?" I asked them both.

"When word went around the Floozie Baths that you had been arrested, I volunteered," Doris gushed.

"Minister Lynne personally appointed me this task," the other ungulate stated crisply. "You may call me Ms. Thomson, Floozy-at-Law, at your service."

>Let's follow Estemere's example and pick the ungulate. Even if she's not with the Sisterhood she at least seems competent
Adler should limit how much in gratitude he is to them - their support comes with demands

Well that's just great, I thought. If she was selected by Lana Lynne, that meant that Thomson was the Sisterhood agent.

"Sorry, ladies," I sighed, resigning myself to my fate. "Ms. Thomson is clearly the most qualified. Doris, 'Wolf Queen,' I thank you for your intentions but alas, it seems I cannot use you at this time."

Doris made a choked sound in her throat and started dabbing at her eyes.

(Adler) Do break out the jug of [Three and a Half], and give it to the "Wolf Queen"

"Not so fast, me boyo," the wolfess snarled. "Sure and nobody gives the Wolf Queen the brush-off like that."

"What would you have from me?" I asked, exasperated.

"Well, did me old eyes deceive me or did I see ye clutchin' to yer breast a moment ago a bonnie wee bottle o' Three-and-a-Half?"

I stared at her agog for a moment.

"Sure and under normal circumstances I'd be loath to deprive a prisoner o' spiritous sustenance, but - ye ungrateful blatherskyte - ye've gone and spurned me largesse, and have cruelly broken this poor doe's heart into the bargain. This poor, tall, lovely, forlorn doe. She stands in need of some gentle consolin'."

"Aren't you married?" I asked suspiciously.

"And who might ye be talkin about?" the 'Wolf Queen' retorted hotly. "Hand over the needful if it's rid o' me ye wish to be."

With a heavy sigh, I pulled the bottle out of my Elfintory and passed it through the bars into the so-called Wolf Queen's waiting paws.

"Many thanks, me boyo," she cackled. "Now then, Doris, me dear. Let's away and drown our sorrows in this sweet Elfhamian nectar."

(Thompson's Gazelle) Take charge.
(Thompson's Gazelle) Notice the Ixie.

"Finally," Ms. Thomson whispered as soon as they were gone. "Now then; I hope you got that Ixie to remove the most damning evidence, Your Highness. I suggest that you speak as little as possible during these proceedings." In a louder voice, she called down the corridor: "Marshal! My client and I are ready!"

Theronmyathus and Avogadro returned to my cell, unlocked it, and led me to a small interrogation room which contained a table and three chairs. The others waited until I was seated, then sat - the Marshal on my left, and the Sergeant directly across from me. Ms. Thomson planted herself delicately in my lap.

"I must advise you -" she began.



"SEARCH HIS ELFINTORY!" Avogadro growled, leaning forward over the table.

"I regret the intrusion upon your person, Your Highness," Theronmyathus croaked. "It is an unfortunate necessity."

>empty out your elfintory (Does anyone remember what was picked up?) SALV monocle & medal / False skunk tail / BOW / the pass from the embassy? / Tail clipper (AH!) / the hand hat / ? ? ? ?

>You know, I feel that, for once in legal proceedings, your best defense is quite litteraly, the truth. You are accused of treason and elves do NOT lie so... just deny. No clever worldplay, no half truthes, just good honest denial when needed and styatement of facts, silence the rest of the time.