Adventurers plops, ripe for the grabbing

You are pirates and you fucking hate rockmelon. Go out on a dangerous quest to the far reaches of Neptune and colonise it in order to destroy all rockmelon in existence nad by feadfault destroy all evil inthe universe.

you are cradling an armful of scrambled eggs and you must find a bowl big enough for them

(no dropping the eggs)

that one came to me in a dream you gotta use it

okay.

You are the appointed governor of a newly founded colony on a wilderness planet at the most remote frontier of the Republic of Human Worlds. You were posted here to establish tentative contact with a mysterious alien empire who's transmissions have been coming through on human radios lately.

You can theoretically expand your colony as fast as you like since there are a billion people sleeping in stasis pods in the one way lander ship, but that's easier said than done, since you have to build an infrastructure to support them from scratch. The adventure would switch between colony builder mode, which would be more strategic, and the personal adventures of individual characters.

It turns out the aliens are hostile. They are looking for an ancient powerful sacred giant mech suit hidden somewhere on the planet. It is the guardian of the planet, built by a long dead race. You must fend off alien attacks.

As the governor, your first duty is to your people, not the RHW, who are always demanding that you negotiate peacefully with the aliens, & that you continuously send mined resources, & farmed produce back to Earth. When you comply with their demands they send more supply drops, which are desperately needed, but sometimes it's impossible to do so and also keep your people safe.

you are cradling an armful of scrambled eggs and you must find a bowl big enough for them

(no dropping the eggs)

unhinge your jaws and eat them. whole. like a snake

i believe the stomach is a sizeable bowl

an adventure in which every suggestion is rejected

an adventure in which every suggestion is rejected

I was actually going to do this with SUGGESTION.EXE but reneged on the idea perhaps a bit too quickly as it turned into the story of an AI with an autoimmune disorder.

Adventure idea:

Adventure author is operating the adventure from the confines of the adventure itself, and is using the medium for a hidden nefarious purpose.

You are bird. You have claimed oak tree as your own. You sing the best song from it. You will attract the best girl bird for sure. But What's this? Other bird is audaciously singing his own song in your tree? This will not stand.

you're an ordinary dog that solves mysteries

you're an ordinary dog that solves mysteries

and plays basketball

you're an ordinary dog that solves mysteries

and plays basketball

YOU ARE AIR BUD, DEFENDER OF HUMANITY.

Or at least, that's what you think you are.

Will you be able to stop the apocalypse [RE: People doing stuff you think is shady] before it's too late?

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T h e___S e e d s___o f___t h e___C o s m o s
Part I: Germination

All suggestions must follow a set of five secret rules that change over time. Bad suggestions are rebuffed appropriately.

It's like a game of D&D except all the characters are skateboarders, & instead of battling with magic & weapons, you play games of S.K.A.T.E. against each other & the whole world is this insane medieval skatepark.

Self restraint "This bomb will self destruct as soon as someone says the phrase 'Taco Tuesday' how long the man strapped to this bomb lives is entirely dependent on the self-restraint of the suggesters"

You are on a hunt to murder three rowdy ogres.

You are invaded by space bees who use mind controlling honey to drug the populace and spread their empire around the globe. Kill their queen.

A poacher must destroy an ancient cult of druids because they're doing his job better than he is and he does not want to be unemployed.

You must kill the inventor of miracle whip.

Lord pugfuck the royal pet pug has become sentient. The madman plans to make it everyone ingest a substance that turns their piss into mountain dew. Stop him.

It's the year of our lord 3602 AD. The king of the space monarchy has died, and left an ambiguous will with no clear mention of the heir. Compete with two dozen other faction leaders and bequeathees in a gameshow to determine who is most fit to be the king!

Praise be Spacezorg, praise be Blastilix.

Somebody dies, however, their ghost and zombified body are split. Puzzles ensured.

Somebody dies, however, their ghost and zombified body are split. Puzzles ensured.

See Disembodied

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You are a fighter pilot on an aircraft carrier that was magically transported to an inland sea in a Fantasy universe in which wizards ride dinosaurs & medieval castles rise out of the rainforest. Your fuel, ammunition, & supplies are limited.

The admiral must conduct diplomacy with local nations to procure supplies, & to find a magic user who can transport you back home. He demonstrates his powerful "magic" by having you & your squadron fly missions. Sometimes you are challenged by sorcerers riding armored pterosaurs. Try to survive until you can get back home.

You have haemorrhoids and you have taken the haemorrhoid steroids for an important mission into space but your astronaut pal who is also a pig decided to flush them down the space toilet. Now you cannot hope to do anything about your haemorrhoids. Nice job.

An evil man is running around and robbing food stores of any kind of food that is coloured yellow. He also kills people.

You have the superpower to turn any sausage you touch into a big leech that drinks only and exclusively green cordial. Some fucking use those guys are.

You think that DC and Marvel are both hopelessly stupid but after watching Suicide Squad you have determined that DC will be the first and top priority on your murder list. Adam Sandler the second.

Your arm got bitten off by a magical talking crocodile named Food Fighter. You paid copious amounts of money for the surgery to receive a prosthetic but oh no... IT CAN'T BE! The doctor attached the anus of a giant sea urchin to your arm stump instead. All your property has been repossessed and you are evicted from your household. Now you must go to a Kung Fu tournament and fight all the dudes there to get the top prize. A fist made out of pyrite.... Hey it's not real gold but I'm sure some guy on eBay wants to buy it.

Somebody dies, however, their ghost and zombified body are split. Puzzles ensured.

See Disembodied

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You are a fighter pilot on an aircraft carrier that was magically transported to an inland sea in a Fantasy universe in which wizards ride dinosaurs & medieval castles rise out of the rainforest. Your fuel, ammunition, & supplies are limited.

The admiral must conduct diplomacy with local nations to procure supplies, & to find a magic user who can transport you back home. He demonstrates his powerful "magic" by having you & your squadron fly missions. Sometimes you are challenged by sorcerers riding armored pterosaurs. Try to survive until you can get back home.

OH SWEET!

In a world where you can choose your destiny by picking up a piece of cardboard handed out by a machine. Some prick cheated the system by scribbling his fate on a blank cardboard. You are not the prick you're the guy who was supposed to be next in line to receive his fate, you're not even mad at him cheating. You just want to catch him and have a LITTLE STERNLY WORDED CONVERSATION WITH THIS RUDE BITCH-ASS MOTHERFUCKER for cutting corners in the queue.

In a world where marriage between human and squirrel is legal, suddenly your dead pet goldfish comes back to life as a squirrel. A romantic comedy....

The television tax demon is angry that nobody has paid the television tax in 3 years. It is time to enact plan: Jungle Disco....

You have been gifted with the power of spontaneous regeneration by the goddess of life while on the brink of death. This is unfortunate as being imprisoned by the cruel president Ardo De Fartfuck has made you resort to eating tiny snippets of yourself to survive. Your face seems delicious....

A wasp is suing the KKK for being called WASPS. Even though they probably don't call themselves that or whatever. Who gives a fuck.

A 3D-printed adventure.

i would definitely do a 3d printed adventure if i had a 3d printer