Confessions

I don't understand how the phases of the moon work and I'm too prideful to look it up.

I've taught science for over a decade, I figure I could just visualize it but I get distracted before I can fully picture it in my head.

SpoilerShow

It's not the earth's shadow, then every new moon would be a lunar eclipse so...it's the moon's shadow? But the moon is tidally locked? How do you make a crescent shadow? No matter how I look at half a sphere it doesn't look like a crescent.

Getting into a rigorous scientific debate about the moon in the confessional booth and the rest of the church is stood outside checking their watches like geez this asshole must have committed some Crimes.

I avoid wearing shorts outside because I hate wearing socks that don't reach my calves, but I worry that society has moved on to ankle socks and no shows.

my arms get cold faster than my legs so I often wear a sweater with shorts

When I was 8 I was at a neighbors house and playing with their kids. We were in the backyard and for some reason I decided to throw a toy gun directly up into the air. The gun landed square on the neighbor kid's head. He immediately started scream crying. Instead of staying there to get told off I immediately ran to my house and hid in my room. I never went to that neighbor's place again and never suffered any consequences for this.

I have been sheltering my daughter from the knowledge of Pikachu.

I didn't do this intentionally, I just owned a Mimikyu doll and played with her, but then a year later we were shopping and she shouted excitedly at a display of Pikachu balloons: "Look! It's Mimikyu!"

In that moment I realized that I had only taught her about Mimikyu, but not Pikachu, in her mind Pikachu is just a weirdly colored Mimikyu...and some deep part of me thought..."I must protect this innocence"

It has become increasingly difficult to do. She only thinks there are 3 episodes of Pokemon Concierge because the fourth episode revolves around a Pikachu. We don't do the base camp level of new Pokemon Snap. She is learning how to read, I can't keep this up forever. I'm an educator by trade and yet I feel compelled to hide this knowledge from her.

Update: I have completely failed.