Dreams.

I dreamt about a puzzle horror game, something along the line sof like amnesia. I was sent into some kind of mineshaft, first by elevator but when the tunnel got steeply down instead of straight down I had to walk the extra few. I arrived at some kind of heavy metal door, with a bunch of barricades on it, all unlocked, and for some reason, however far down I was and how dark the area around me seemed, the door was the only object well-lit. It didn't even glow, I could only make out the heavy door.

Pushing it open revealed some kind of mansion, with some kind of tiled pattern, an organ by the side wall which I remember having several colored keys, and the wall next to it being only about chest high and giving out to some kind of hedge. The room continued to show a statue of some emperor, hands tied and eyes sewn shut. It had something written under it, but in a different language I couldn't read. I continued to a dead end, where there was just an empty room with a wall, so I had to track back. When I looked back, I noticed that the statue guy was completely gone. only the pedestal remained, and the words on it (they had moved to my direction) were scrambled, but still unreadable. My mind actually played scary music at that point.

Further on, I saw the door that had slammed shut behind me with a heavy thud hanging unhinged, and flipping out as if it was going to speed of in twenty directions at once, almost every moment switching angle and position entirely. I saw a figure staggering towards me, arms behind his back and his head strangely aloof, but his legs had a very composed way of walking. Every step he took, his knees went way to far up, and he shouted something.

I was hella freaking out at this point, because he kept staring straight ahead, not at me, and when he got close I got a good look at him. He was dressed in a formal toga, but splattered with purple paint, his head was a cat's face, eyes bleeding red, and whenever he took a step, when his knee was at the top of his walk, he shouted a boolean value, something like RED IS TRUE, BLUE IS FALSE. He walked on to the statue, and took his place, and stared straight up at a hole in the ceiling I was sure wasn't there. But when I player the organ, he started facing and walking towards me instead, still shouting, but considerably faster. The music sped up too. I got scared of trying out stuff when he got close and when I left the organ seat he went back to his spot.

The rest of the dream is sort of a blur, but I remember the organ disappearing once I played the right song that basically turned the guy back to stone or killed him or something (no idea what to do with it) but I remember a few loose bits of it.

I remember acquiring air powers and pushing people into various traps in a very crowded room so they would actually go out the way. Their blood was purple, and every time they died I heard something that I could actually understand: it said WRONG.

I remember a picket fence with slim, barbed poles, that wasn't there at first and seemed to be a way out (way out, not up) into a forest, but when I got closer the bars creeped closer together.

I remember being trapped in a room that was like three tiles long wide and high, and every minute exactly (don't ask me how I kept the time) another me would walk in by opening up a panel, kill me, and like a video game I'd assume control of that me. This continued until every last bit of that room was bleeding red. I remember breaking out, but when I broke out the room kept generating copies of me with their hands tied that tried to bite me or headbutt me or otherwise kill me without having any way to do so.

I don't remember getting out alive.

What do you guys dream about?

THANKS FOR THE NIGHTMARE FUEL WOFF

Yikes. That is one freaky dream. D:

The dream I had last night (which, by sheer chance, I chose to write down before I forgot it) is a good deal brighter.

So I found myself playing a Gameboy Color, that old lime green model, and it had this Pokemon Silver cartridge in it. The screen had that GB startup text kind of style, except instead of "GAMEBOY COLOR" at the top it said "CONGRATULATIONS," and below it in smaller, plain black text it said "You broke it."

I pulled out the cartridge and put it back in, and when I started the gameboy up again it popped up that same text format, except now the big colored text was the name of some GB. I don't remember which one; I'm not sure it was one that exists. I distinctly remember it started with an "I" (as in "The I...") but I don't remember anything else. Anyway, after that vanished it started showing up some credits with opening shots of various people, kind of like the way it did things in the A-Team. I honestly don't remember who each character was; I think one was Kracht, and Cedric may have showed up, but the rest were a blur. All the videos were in different styles, too. It was really confusing.

Anyway, in some of them I could select an actor to play them, which was weird given that the final thing turned into...well, I'll get to that. Anyway, I could select from a number of actors by scrolling through them. Each one was a different color, but this person with a green name kept showing up, until finally they were the only option for the last character. That poor person might have ended up playing almost everyone in the movie.

And it was definitely a movie, but here's the weird part: it was a claymation zombie horror movie. (The zombie part is probably because I watched 28 Days Later a few hours before going to bed.) I don't remember exactly what happened, although I recall something wearing a bright red plastic baseball helmet getting flying tackled by a zombie, which had the exact same headgear on.

And uh...that's really all I have down in my notes! I must've woken up at that point.

I had a pretty interesting dream a few days ago.


So I was in class with the professor I had last year in optics. I don't know if that's what the class was about because I couldn't pay attention to what he was talking about due to the fact that he was dressed like a goblin, or imp or whatever. I actually never consciously noticed it before, but he actually kinda looks like a goblin.

Anyway, the important part is that his attire included an extremely short skirt and nothing underneath.

So, of course, he got a huge boner, with obvious consequences. Or maybe not so obvious, because at first I seemed to be the only one to notice it. I was getting pretty nervous and thinking stuff like "come on people don't act like you're not seeing the professor's dick! say something! laugh!!" but everybody was too focused on the class I guess.

Until the professor stopped talking all of sudden. This is something he used to do in his actual classes, he'd stop talking, stay quiet for like ten seconds, and then start telling us a story of his student days or something like that. Anyway in the dream he stopped talking, and got all flustered. His face got all read and drops of sweat began rolling down his face.

"wh...what... what am i supposed to do now?"

And then the rest of the class realized what was going on and burst into laughter.


Fast forward to a few minutes after. The professor opened a previously nonexistant door next to the blackboard and found some stairs down, at the bottom of which was some kind of storage room full of togas. He rejoiced, put a toga on, and went on with the class. And everything was good (and covered).


Until he turned around. Apparently his toga was some kind of hospital gown or something because it covered absolutely nothing behind him.

And he had such a wonderful butt you wouldn't believe it. Best one I've ever seen. It was magical.

Then everybody in the class decided they wanted a toga too so everyone put one on, and I could see everybody's asses and oh god the asses. Everybody had the best butts. Perfect cheeks everywhere. So soft and round and... just perfect.


I was overwhelmed by such beauty and woke up.

The end.

Do you want to change dreams Epams? Yours are hilaaaarious

I just had this dream that there was a new Homestuck flash. I was on the website and I could see there was a new one, but also Hussie still had one of those progress bars going only this was 'progress to end of act 6' and it was nearly full. I remember going on #grandbattle and I was going to say something cutting about introducing pointless new characters and focusing upon them but decided it would be a decent opportunity to log on to #mspafa because in my brain that is all about talking about homestuck? Could be I don't know I don't frequent it. Anyway Whim was there and she wanted to know what I was going to say but I opted to watch the flash before voicing opinions.

So the flash; it focused on completely new characters who I think were from a different universe. They were orcs I think. Anyway they were playing sburb or whatever their local variant was, and it went on for a bit with them blathering on with each other with their various typing quirks because yeah they had typing quirks. Anyway then after a while it cuts elsewhere and they're being watched by the kids, though it's the scratched kids so we don't really know them very well either. Anyway they are watching the orcs and somehow it becomes clear that they are in competition. So the orcs are leaving and the kids follow. Then everyone starts fighting.

At this point it's more a video game than a homestuck flash and I have this weapon which is sort of like the suck gun from Ratchet and Clank and it sucks up all the orcs grubs and bullets and whatever and unleashes it in like a death tornado. Fighting goes on for a while and whichever kid I am and this orc who keeps taunting me. We end up in some kind of parachuting showdown over a city somewhere and i guess I killed him or something.

Next thing we're in this field in front of this big building with a big red indicator over the stone door. One of the kids has died (for some reason I think the kid that died was somehow Sollux) and the orcs are treating it like it's a game of mafia. They worked out that his role was our inventor and he was responsible for maintaining the portals that led to our den or universe or whatever. There's sort of a final scuffle and I believe Jade, or whatever the scratched equivalent of Jade is, was the only one left and thus they won the game.

Then it cut back to characters we actually know and the implication was that this was going to now play out for those characters. Bluh whatever. Before I go to complain about how dumb it all was I check the credits list to find that Malky was credited for something or other, though I have no idea what exactly. Also CreptacularDisessembler who I only know from Sleepfia. There were other people but they are the only ones I remember by name.

I have the best dreams ever. A recurring feature is the house of my grandmother. There is always something exciting over there, like a lake with flying whales, or Weird Al Yankovic! Although he poured orange juice into my computer. How rude!

Memorable dreams include: Odysseus inventing the french revolution; Narwhal Plane; Our School is now coeducated human-raptor school.

Also sometimes a dream runs out before I wake up, and I can press the NewGame+ button. It is so amazing.

okay gotta get this out before i forget even more
I just had a dream that was a series of commercials for a trivia game device. The device appeared to be a box with flashing lights that when played, would present the player with a question to answer. There was no screen to present the question, nor was there an audible question being presented, but the later 'commercials' made it seem like a trivia thing.

Argh, it's one of those dreams that I'm having trouble remembering, I can't really remember the first two. There was a bedroom, and I think trying to play this game without waking up somebody who's sleeping in that bedroom waking up, and failing. Not sure. They definitely played into each other. NEXT.

Okay so the next one was some kinda celebrity endorsement deal I guess because some famous lady from some TV show which I'm going to assume was How I Met Your Mother for reasons later in the commercial. There's also a guy there sitting on a couch, and the lady is explaining to him how music helps her think, and one song in particular, which I think is a Maroon 5 song? I'm not sure but it's a very specific song and it's some manner of club song, I think. Some manner of scientist sets the product on the table in front of the man and starts fiddling with it. The lights on the device go on and it starts cycling through songs while the man talks about how he doesn't think that song is very great I mean it's good but there are better songs by them and suddenly the right song starts playing, and the volume is amplified intensely and the flashing lights get ludicrously bright as the man suddenly transforms into Neil Patrick Harris from the exposure. He instantly gives the answer to the question, whatever it was.

Finally there was some manner of dealie like Who Wants To Be A Millionaire. Our contestant sits at a console across from Regis Philbin, and he's just gotten another question right. Regis asks if the player would like to continue and the player confirms, so he discards a small piece of cardboard with a bar code on it and reaches into a slot on the console for another, only to instead produce an elaborate string of those pieces of cardboard and jewels and the like. Regis warns that the next question may be a little intense and the contestant is led over to a couch in front of the device where the barcode jewel string thing is inserted. Everybody puts on goggles but the contestant. The device plays (the same song from the previous commercial) and the intense flashing lights all go at the player. The contestant proceeds to see infinity.

Aaaand that's it. I don't know what the hell this device is, but I want one.

Man, everyone has such cooler dreams than myself. All of my dreams "follow the rules," aka things that may be unlikely to happen but are still feasible in reality.

For example the last dream I remember having was about being in a relationship with my high school crush and nobody approving in the slightest. The majority of the dream was a Skype conversation, whose highlights are listed below:

-I built and screencapped a quote in minecraft, but ended up butchering it.
-I excused myself once to head inside (I was skyping from my driveway, apparently? It was the summertime, so my laptop was overheating and I had to dodge a bee on my way inside the house).
-We joked around about how the snow around Disney's Matterhorn looks sort of like a bunch of ghosts (it probably doesn't, although some ghosts are just white mounds)
-I accidently copypasta'd a smiley-filled piece of spam about the 4th of July several times while she was away, but the Skype conversation cleared at 7pm somehow? Then we resumed talking.
-She mentioned at some point that despite how everyone else had felt about it, nobody had asked her how she felt about being in a relationship with me (Dream me was afraid to ask after that, lol he's so realistic).

Then I woke up.

All I want is bubblegum bazooka-zooka bubblegum one dream where a volcano sprouts from the floor or some shit, is that so much to ask?

I just had a dream where I was running a successful business selling ledges, and also hosted a popular radio show about ledges. What is wrong with me?!

I just had a dream where I was running a successful business selling ledges, and also hosted a popular radio show about ledges. What is wrong with me?!

If you're going off the deep end, I've got a nice ledge I can sell you.

Ix,don't fall for his trying to sucker you into a quick sale; for all you know it's a slippery slope.

In a situation like yours, it's less about the bells and whistles and more about location location location.

Will Ixcaliber strike the deal of his life? Or will he fall prey to a spiral of bad decisions and loan sharks? TUNE IN NEXT TIME!