Shank A Bitch 3 Day Six: The Handsman Cometh (10/71 Alive)

Open package

EBWOP: the one I'm holding, I mean

Special Delivery

Top Safety Tip Of The Day!

Sadly, it seems yd12k has not read the above poster or anything similar ever before, and so he tears into the package without a care in the world despite the numerous red flags, including

• Strange liquid dripping from the corners
  
• The distinct smell of gunpowder
  
• Metallic rustling on handling
  
• Dangerously sharp lumps
  

All highly suspicious! Not suspicious enough for yd12k, though.

yd12k was a REGULAR SHANKER. He was also a WHALE DUELIST, and his untimely death will not keep him from competing in the press conference as he had already submitted his press docket before the day began. It remains to be seen whether he can achieve a fabled posthumous victory. He will sadly be unavailable for any Q&A sessions.

The other package sits in antisequitur's hands. Not watching. Not really waiting, either. It's not sentient, remember. But it sits there.

Day Four ends in ~49 hours at 2:00 PM EST on Thursday, August 21st.

With 34 players alive it takes 18 votes to groupshank.

I would like to place antisequitur and his suspicious package into a plastic bubble. Or a giant hamster ball.

Aja: when all my dime dancing is through, I run to you. Open the package.

(And god bless the old anthrax-scare era postal safety advisories.)

lol that package

Hahahahaha. This is amazing.

I SUPPOSE YOU COULD SAY IT... PACKED A PUNCH.

ALSO, SCHAZ, LEGENDARYQ, SEND ME YOUR MARINE MAMMAL REQUESTS IN A PM OR SOMETHING AND THEY WILL BE DRAWN POSTHASTE.

antisequitur has learnt NOTHING AT ALL from yd12k's untimely demise, and ALSO decides to open the mail he's appropriated without so much as glancing at it.

It detonates on cue, and not even the jazzrock power of Steely Dan is enough to save him from the ensuing shanksplosion.

antisequitur was an ELITE BODYGUARD. He was already a dead man walking, but his WALKMAN PACT TO USE A STEELY DAN SONG NAME IN EACH POST with the mod had kept him going. If he hadn't been foolish enough to get himself exploded, he might have found medical attention before the day was out. Too bad!

Day Four ends in ~47 hours at 2:00 PM EST on Thursday, August 21st.

With 33 players alive it takes 17 votes to groupshank.

Cat - 7 (Dragon Fogel, SupahKiven, amosmyn, Sruixan, Chwoka, speedchuck, Sai)
Chwoka - 4 (Cat, Breadpocalypse, LegendaryQ, Phish)
Schazer - 2 (Plaid, Gnauga)
Acionyx - 2 (Seedy, Pharmacy)
SupahKiven - 1 (Whimbrel)
FlyingPhish - 1 (Schazer)
"any Un-Dead" - 1 (Truegreen)
"Chaos Emeralds" - 1 (konec0)
Sanzh - 1 (Not The Author)
konec0 - 1 (Dalmationer)

Abstaining - 12 (Solaris, Palamedes, Granolaman, Coldblooded, TehPilot, cyber95, Niall, Deviant One, Sanzh, Scoffles, Acionyx, Ixcaliber)

yeah that's what you get for voting for me

well
shank: cat

M m m m monster kill kill kil kill

Awww, and here I was hoping that we would get to play a nice game of DEADLY Hot Potato with the remaining package. Oh well.

Lynch Cat

Gyahahahaha

Gyahahahaha

A+ picture-editing, Gnauga wins my support for the next non-murderous box

I am happy that my work is integrated into this photoedit.

Wow, I dodged a bullet there
My belated thanks to antisequitur

Vote: Gnauga for president.

I MEAN GNAUGA FOR PRESIDENT DAMN THIS IS GETTING OLD MAYBE I SHOULD JUST ADD SILENCERS TO THE ENGINE SO I DON'T NEED TO USE THESE LOUDSPEAKERS ALL THE TIME.

dalmationer maybe that's what the creative block does

it accentuates your creative abilities thus naturally amplifying your voice

or something

Or you could simply input a telepathic broadcaster. Then you can speak to anyone anywhere at any volume.

Telepathic Broadcaster is the intellectual property of Mental Telepathy Co and their subsidiaries. Mental Telepathy Co is not responsible for the misuse of their product or mental overload related to the use of said product. Do not use product in the vicinity of large bodies of water or puppies.

VOTE: ☆ C.H.W.O.K.A ☆

I'LL VOTE FOR WHOMSOEVER I DAMN WELL PLEASE AND YOU CAN'T STOP ME

Also according to Mirdini I may have accidentally downed that Blow Job.

See, I only shanked you 'cause you didn't give me the Blow Job you offered, and now you tell me that you "accidentally" guzzled one whilst claiming to have been thoroughly in love with me... well, excuse me for being miffed...