Shank A Bitch 3 Day Six: The Handsman Cometh (10/71 Alive)

I'm offering nightmares and eternal winter who wants to worship me?

Important Clarification: Does "eternal winter" just mean that it's cold all the time, or is this like a Groundhog Day scenario, except with an extra 90 days or so added on instead of just being February 2nd all the time?

Also what's going in the Southern Hemisphere during all this? Do they get eternal summer now, or like, double winter?

Okay hear me out. What if we chopped the world in half at the equator, and then just threw both halves into the further reaches of space?

That way everybody's happy.

@Druplesnubb @Scoffles:
What the hell are you doing
don't vote for malkytop
this isn't a democracy
this is a monarchy
malkytop is already leader, diety, etc





vvote garuru instead

okay so according to my calculations there is a page 11 and page 12, and now i am update to date...........................................................................................................

so EBWOWOPWPPP
@Druplesnubb @Scoffles: and at everyone else who voted for malkytop
What the hell are you doing
don't vote for malkytop
this isn't a democracy
this is a monarchy
malkytop is already leader, diety, etc

[*]She likes bugs. Seriously, who likes bugs? Scum.

I think I found someone worth killing

Vote: Kieros

I AM CHANGING MY VOTE. DISSING BUGS IS INTOLERABLE.
VOTE: KÍEROS

shank dang ron paul, aka coldblooded

they're the same person guys. trust me

[*]She likes bugs. Seriously, who likes bugs? Scum.

I think I found someone worth killing

Vote: Kieros

I AM CHANGING MY VOTE. DISSING BUGS IS INTOLERABLE.
VOTE: KÍEROS

No yeah I saw this and I would have immediately changed my vote but i had like four pages to go through to make sure nobody else noticed it and THEY DID
unshankvote
shankvote: Kieros

unacceptable
simply
i can't even
just completely devoid of any ability to can
vote:kieros

toot my own blowhole

toot my own blowhole

toot my own blowhole

Gnauga is that you putting your dukes up

I'll shoal you the error of your ways, school you real good

(I am super-keen to do whale raps and just need someone gutsy enough to challenge me)

you know what yeah ill side with whimbrel

vote to groupshank: THE OWNER OF THIS RESORT, apparently. because i fully endorse whoever malky votes for and that would be whimsy at the moment. crowstone can suck it, because this is democranarchy. :P

on second thought i'll keep my groupshank: on malkytop in the interest of possibly having everybody alive groupshank the false goddess

Let the whales stop.

Let the rhymes drop.

i'd ask you to school me but i think i'd just be disa-pod-ded
bulls to cows, shore to bed
best fin-d a new crew cuz your old one's baleen, bub
yo next verse you best not flub

RAP

RAP

RAP

RAP

Vote: fivex

IF YOU ARE PLANNING ON SINGING WORSHIPFUL ELEGIES OR WHATEVER THE SHIT TO THE COMMON WHALE I AM GOING TO CONSIDER THAT BLASPHEMY CEASE AND DESIST YOUR RESISTANCE TO MY GLORY

ALSO I FORGOT WHO I'M SHANKING SHANK: GARURU

there we go now i only have to endorse myself

aw man I mixed up the line order and now the bub-bulls pun is broken
and I was getting all emily moby-dickens here

So I heard you want to hear some raps cetacean, I'll take up your challenge, I'm no tourist sightseein'/
Ain't delaying/
Just saying/
You don't know what you're doin, slugger./
I'm impervious to heat, I'm coated in blubber./

Filter feeding on words in rhyming pods/
Keep ahead of you poor earthbound sods/
To catch me, you'll need the super rod/
So get beat, cos I'm bigger than a hundred cod.

BLASPHEMY BLASPHEMY BLASPHEMY BLASPHEMY

SHANK: DALMATIONER

shank dang ron paul, aka coldblooded

they're the same person guys. trust me

Oh yeah, well if that's true than why did I get a weird, Two-Face looking rash on the side of my face on the same week that Dang Ron Paul and Coldblooded finally decided to show up in the same game, huh? Can your "science" explain that?

Clearly the only reasonable explanation here is that the two of them are currently fighting a 'Jekyll and Hyde' type battle for dominance inside of me right now, and that killing Coldblooded would only make Dang Ron Paul grow even stronger. And if Ron Paul is the evil half, than clearly I must be the not evil half.

Q.E.D.

I'm swimmin'/
In schools off the coast/
Of hoenn, I'm homin' in/
On ya/
Can't stop ma'/
Balooga bazooka, cos there's narwhal to hide/
So here my sister a secret I'll confide/

Whales are the true gods/
They don't be ailin'/
They're the only ones who can talk to aliens/
Go back in time to find this rhyme sailin'/
To grab us a whale rap to stop ya from bailin/

Eternal winter is more than snow on the ground all year long! [though yes there will be snow on the ground all year long. everywhere. ever.]

Eternal Winter somewhere between a nightmarish apocalypse, a winter wonderland, and a state of mind~

malkytop why do you oppose the eternal undeath to be ushered in by my reign
worship meeee

[warning warning warning]
[schazer slam imminent]
[all civilians are advised to evacuate panickedly]

shank dang ron paul, aka coldblooded

they're the same person guys. trust me

Oh yeah, well if that's true than why did I get a weird, Two-Face looking rash on the side of my face on the same week that Dang Ron Paul and Coldblooded finally decided to show up in the same game, huh? Can your "science" explain that?

Clearly the only reasonable explanation here is that the two of them are currently fighting a 'Jekyll and Hyde' type battle for dominance inside of me right now, and that killing Coldblooded would only make Dang Ron Paul grow even stronger. And if Ron Paul is the evil half, than clearly I must be the not evil half.

Q.E.D.

b....uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu......... tttttttttttt

that just means we have to make sure your whole body is dead.

with extra shanks.

Holy fek, I leave for like half the day and suddenly there's twelve pages of this stuff. And nobody's died yet! I'm disappointed in you all. If there was a picture of me right here, it would be one of me staring in disappointment. That's how disappointed I am. (I actually just don't want to read all of that)

Shank: SupahKiven Wait.

hang a tic I'm working to make this properly quality