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07-09-2018, 02:33 PM
You're a middle-aged man who lives in a modest apartment. There are monsters outside.
And one of them is trying to get in, its arm slowly inching deeper into your home.
You are a little ashamed to admit that you were startled earlier and dropped your kitchen knife onto the floor when you saw the arm trying to grab your ankles.
You need to solve this problem before the arm goes so deep it can reach your bed. That would be very distressing.
You could try going for the knife. You could just stomp on the arm. You could also search for another weapon.
You could also try calling for help on your cellphone or laptop. You're not sure why the power's still on, or why the internet still works, but you know there are still people somewhere reading messages.
You can even try talking to the monster. Sometimes they answer back. Sometimes they don't.
Point is, there are monsters outside. One is trying to get you. If it touches your bare skin, you become another monster.
What do you do?
>_
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07-09-2018, 02:35 PM
Avoid touching the monster, but try to politely ask them through the door if they can wait a second because you dropped your knife and having a knife on the floor is a big safety hazard that needs to be addressed before anything else!
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07-09-2018, 02:40 PM
Put on long pants and boots, tuck pants into boots to prevent any accidents
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07-09-2018, 02:59 PM
(07-09-2018, 02:40 PM)Schazer Wrote: »Put on long pants and boots, tuck pants into boots to prevent any accidents
Doubling! we should try saying hi to the monster, maybe it's jus lonely
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07-09-2018, 03:41 PM
>Ypu shuld probably wear several layer oc clothin when a monster is near.
>You may want to rach with your foot for the kife nd then kick it inward. A moster arm creeping to your bed is bad enough but a monster am wih a knife would be worse.
>Maybe try talkin to the monter next. Maybe they js wantsomething else tan your tender flsh ?
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07-09-2018, 06:13 PM
>Pick a shirt in your clothes chest and use it as a improvised glove.
>Say hello to the monster, if he doesn't say anything back, just... Smash your chair at that monster godless arm.
Duck, duck, duck, duck, GHOOST.
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07-09-2018, 10:59 PM
Get a glove and shake hands with it.
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07-09-2018, 11:27 PM
(07-09-2018, 02:40 PM)Schazer Wrote: »Put on long pants and boots, tuck pants into boots to prevent any accidents
You don't have any boots but you are able to tuck the ends of your pants into your shoes. Good thinking!
(07-09-2018, 06:13 PM)LammarWesley Wrote: »>Pick a shirt in your clothes chest and use it as a improvised glove.
You grab some extra shirts from your clothes-box in the bedroom. You wrap those shirts around your arms, and voila! Makeshift gloves! You should have done this earlier.
(07-09-2018, 02:35 PM)Eve The Maxim Wrote: »Avoid touching the monster, but try to politely ask them through the door if they can wait a second because you dropped your knife and having a knife on the floor is a big safety hazard that needs to be addressed before anything else!
You try talking to the monster.
“Hey, I dropped my knife. That's unsafe, you know? Could you pull your arm back, please? I need to get the knife.”
The monster gurgles, and answers back with the voice of an old lady.
“Can...dy”
It wants candy?
Okay.
You open your fridge. Fortunately, you were hoarding dozens of candy bars. 48. in fact. You put one near the monster's hand. You got 47 candy bars now.
The monster's gone, satisfied with your offering. The monsters outside are weird, unpredictable and unsettling. You don't know what you're going to do in the long term. You're gonna last a month at the most.
You retrieve your kitchen knife and place it on top of your microwave. Should be safe there.
Your laptop dings. A new email. It's from the government. You read it.
“From: Ministry of Internal Affairs
To: You (Costovo Elmada)
Subject: Stay in your home
Do not leave your home. The monsters have been tearing off pieces of themselves and placing them on the ground and on top of roofs. You could accidentally step on a piece or have one fall on you, and that would be it. You'll be one of them.
We are going to clean out the country. Your hometown included. Street by street, house by house, door by door. We got tanks, planes, hazmat suits. We were caught off-guard but now we know we can win. Hang tight. Stay in your home until further notice. We know you're the only civilian left in this city, but we will not stop until we can reach you. Good luck.”
As if on cue, you can hear an explosion outside. Must be the army obliterating a building nearby. You hope they can reach you soon.
Then you hear something coming from the toilet.
Another monster?
Oh. It's just sewage. Lots and lots of sewage.
Great, the toilet's overflowing. That explosion must have ruined the sewers or something. As if being cooped up here wasn't bad enough, now you have to deal with this awful smell.
Amidst the sewage, you find a hand grenade. How did that get there?
You take it, and look at it closely. Government markings. Some soldier must have dropped this somehow. This stinky grenade could save your life, so you keep it.
Night comes. You can hear a monster moving around in the hallway outside, sounding like a wet sponge being slapped around. You stay quiet.
Then it starts slamming against the wall next to your door. Cracks begin to form on the thin wall.
This is one strong monster! You grab your knife and try calling out to it.
“Hey, go away!”
It shouts back like a madman.
“DIE DIE DIE DIE!”
Desperate, you take a long shot.
“I uh, I have candy!”
It screeches back.
“NO NO NO NO! DIE DIE DIE DIE!”
You gotta act fast.
You can use the grenade and blow it up from behind the wall... but that's gonna leave a big-ass hole.
You could try pushing your cupboard in front of it, though you're not sure how much that's going to help.
You can try stabbing it through the cracks in the wall. There's just enough space for you to push the blade through.
Another option would be to retreat into your bathroom. The smell of sewage could repel it, though there's no guarantee that's going to work.
>_
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07-09-2018, 11:31 PM
>Don't you have a window you coul throw the grenade out off ?
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07-09-2018, 11:34 PM
"You can't kill me! I'm already dead, a shivering bundle of bones!"
...Might work. Retreat to the bathroom immediately afterwards.
Quiet. Good for an unusual opinion. Doesn't talk much.
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07-10-2018, 12:22 AM
(This post was last modified: 07-10-2018, 12:24 AM by LammarWesley.)
>Pick up one of your clothes in the chest and dip it in the sewer dirt water!
>Use the sewer-wet shirt to repel that horrible creature.
This solves two problems, your bathroom dirty floor and the monster!
Duck, duck, duck, duck, GHOOST.
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07-10-2018, 01:18 AM
"No No No No Break! I'm Monster too!"
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(03-02-2015, 02:07 AM)Papers Wrote: »i don't know what i expected from reyweld's new hawkspace thread (06-02-2016, 04:16 AM)Schazer Wrote: »Tokyo could kick your scrawny ass (11-10-2017, 06:39 PM)Myeth Wrote: »reach for the stars
And then annihilate them as a powermove (02-06-2017, 01:02 AM)Justice Watch Wrote: »
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07-10-2018, 02:02 AM
"But why? I thought we were friends :("
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07-10-2018, 04:12 AM
Maybe use something to scoop up the sewage and have it as a uniquely disgusting form of spackle/repellent to deter the monster?
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07-10-2018, 06:45 AM
"Wanna have a tea party? Let's be friends!"
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07-10-2018, 07:55 AM
(This post was last modified: 07-10-2018, 07:57 AM by Mayu_Zane.)
(07-09-2018, 11:31 PM)smuchmuch Wrote: »>Don't you have a window you coul throw the grenade out off ?
A window? No, you're too poor to afford an apartment with a window. Considering all the monsters out there, that might be a good thing in this situation.
(07-10-2018, 01:18 AM)Reyweld Wrote: »"No No No No Break! I'm Monster too!"
The monster breaks enough of the wall to look inside.
“LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR!”
Oh no.
(07-10-2018, 12:22 AM)LammarWesley Wrote: »>Pick up one of your clothes in the chest and dip it in the sewer dirt water!
>Use the sewer-wet shirt to repel that horrible creature.
This solves two problems, your bathroom dirty floor and the monster!
You rush to grab a shirt and rub it all over your filth-covered bathroom. You turn back towards the monster and shove a big load of human waste into it.
“GROSS! GROSS! GROSS! GROSS!”
It runs away in terror. Good thing it still understands the concept of disgust.
You get another email. You push your cupboard in front of the hole before reading it.
'From: TROLLMASTER HADES
To: You (Costovo Elmada)
Subject: HAVING FUN?
“ARE YTOU HAVE ING FUN?! Me am gonna sEND MONSTARS TO YOUR ROOM EVERY CHANCE I GET!
Yes yes yes YUS I AM MONSTER TOO it is good to be monstaer
LETS ALL BE ONE BIG HAPPY FAMILY AND SHOVE ARMS INTO EACH OTHERS MOUTHS
ITS ALL I THINK ABOUT NOW
make more make more make more make more make more make more
MonSTARS!!!!”
A monster is using email to taunt you? And they're deliberately sending monsters to you? Will wonders never cease.
Come to think of it, you've heard of 'Trollmaster Hades' before. Even before this monster outbreak started, they've always been a real asshat. If only the disease ruined their intellect.
You get another email. It's from someone in the Government. It's fairly long.
“From: Dr. Belinda Cobra
To: You (Costovo Elmada)
Subject: Found that grenade, huh
Hello Mr. Costovo. I am Belinda Cobra, Head of Research (Ministry of Health) regarding this 'monster outbreak' we're having. We dropped a hand grenade fitted with a location tracker into the sewage system. We hypothesized that with the right amount of water pressure, we could send items into your apartment via the sewer system. After monitoring the grenade's position and correlating that with data from your cellphone, we can safely conclude that it made it into your hands.
I apologize for ruining your bathroom. It must be looking (and smelling) pretty bad right now. However, this means we can now send you food and other items reliably. Don't worry, we'll send them to you inside airtight containers.
Tomorrow morning we'll send you a pack of military rations. Enough for a whole week, but you may eat as much as you like. We got a surplus of food after losing a quarter of our soldiers. I should tell you not to eat too much, but considering the circumstances a feast might lift your spirits.
I am also going to send you some declassified information about the 'monsters' (sorry I hate that word but everyone's calling them that so whatever). Here's what we know about them so far:
This is a viral epidemic. We're calling it the (ugh) Monster Virus.
The virus spreads via direct physical contact. Any part of an infected person is contagious.
The incubation period between point of contact to complete transformation varies from person to person. Fastest is 2 hours. Slowest is about 1 week.
Over 90% of infected people lose their memories and personalities, and they become obsessed with spreading the disease either by hunting targets or by using whatever intelligence remains to set up traps. We've seen them remove limbs and leave them lying around. We even found one trying to put their fingers into bags of potato chips.
A very small number of people manage to retain their lucidity after infection. We found a few of them surrendering to our military with white flags. They are still contagious, but co-operative and coherent.
So. With regards to that last part.
We're going to send an infected person to protect you.
No, we are not trying to deliberately infect you. She will be wearing a hazmat suit, and has a camera attached to her so we can monitor her. We even put a bomb on her in case she tries to trick us. She consented.
She is ignored by other 'monsters', so we considered her to be a good candidate as backup. She can attack other monsters just fine, and they won't bother trying to infect her. She will be armed with a hammer and an assault rifle. As luck would have it, she's former military, so I can assure you that she is capable.
Her name is Alyssa Gnu. The password is '230687' (Two-Three-Zero-Six-Eight-Seven). If she contacts you, ask her for it before answering any questions.
Our plan is simple: We're going to make sure the entire city is safe and quarantined before we retrieve you. We are not going to take any chances. We are going to make sure there's no way you'll get infected before we even try. It would suck if we rescued you and then a drop of blood ruins everything, right?
Good luck, Mr. Costovo.”
Finally! Some good news! You send her an email with your thanks. Hopefully she'll appreciate the gesture.
You yawn, and go to bed. You take your kitchen knife with you.
You get the feeling tomorrow's going to be a good day.
DAY 2
Today is not a good day.
You just woke up, opened your bedroom door and saw two monsters sitting on your couch. They're not hostile, or at least they're not attacking. However, they're not responding to anything you're saying. Sewage isn't working either.
Worse, they left the door wide open. How the hell did they get in, anyway?
Well, you're gonna have to solve that mystery later. What are you going to do about these two?
You got a knife, a hand grenade and a box full of old clothes.
Maybe you can scare them away? Or just... cover them with clothes? You could try pushing the sofa away from the laptop at least.
Damn you, Trollmaster Hades.
>_
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07-10-2018, 07:56 AM
> Use the grenade you goof.
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07-10-2018, 08:11 AM
The two seem docile enough to ignore, but... Even docile monsters are infectious. hrmm...
>Hold off on the hand grenade for a moment. It's a nice couch, and blowing up the monsters will get bits of monster everywhere and be a real pain to clean out.
>See what they're looking at?
>...Ask for the password?
Quiet. Good for an unusual opinion. Doesn't talk much.
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07-10-2018, 11:45 AM
>The laptop is wide open! They may have learned the password by snooping, so we can't trust that. (Also, clearly not in a hazmat suit)
>If they don't respond to your voice, maybe they are lucid? open the door and peek out, to see what they do. If they look like they're taking hostile action, close and barricade the door, putting clothing underneath the crack.
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(03-02-2015, 02:07 AM)Papers Wrote: »i don't know what i expected from reyweld's new hawkspace thread (06-02-2016, 04:16 AM)Schazer Wrote: »Tokyo could kick your scrawny ass (11-10-2017, 06:39 PM)Myeth Wrote: »reach for the stars
And then annihilate them as a powermove (02-06-2017, 01:02 AM)Justice Watch Wrote: »
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07-10-2018, 12:48 PM
(This post was last modified: 07-10-2018, 12:49 PM by LammarWesley.)
>Don't use a granade, mainly because you're also inside this apartment and making a hole would make more monsters in.
>Use your bedsheet to cover them up, they must be cold and ask if they want any food, be chill, they're still in some sort of sense "human", the morbid one.
>Just say that they can't stay here if they don't have anything to trade with us or any offer.
>Remember to close the door!
Duck, duck, duck, duck, GHOOST.
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07-10-2018, 01:03 PM
>Maybe you coud wrap some sheets over our shoulders and arm. Later when whatsherface comes, you can ask her if sshe can get those two out and get the couch back.
>Also the virus is contagious by direc touch but what aboutobject touhed by monters ? does the virus stay ? doee it need/can it be washed up ? if yo don't know you can chat to the millitary base lady about it.
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07-10-2018, 10:47 PM
"Heyo friends, could you get off my couch? I like sitting on it, thanks. Also, could you please get out and close the door behind you? I don't want to use a shirt covered in poop."
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07-10-2018, 11:21 PM
Ask for the password
~◕ w◕~
I thought it would be funny.
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07-11-2018, 02:57 AM
Scratch your way through the wall into your bathroom.
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07-11-2018, 03:51 AM
Make scary faces at them.
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