Spyderhaus - aka Spiderhalls

On the outskirts of your unassuming town theres this House, a spooky house. Officially, it's abandoned, noone lives there, but people tell stories, like that it's haunted, or that it's owned by a vampire, or a witch. Or maybe it's owned by a ghost conjuring vampire-witch, that'd be pretty scary you think. Nobody knows for certain though, they say nobody who goes in there ever comes out. You're not sure, because you don't personally know anyone who's gon in there, it's always 'I heard someone heard someone say' and such.

>


This is you!
You've lost a bet, so now you've got to go into this spooky, possibly haunted manse, and stay in it for the whole night. You're not particularly keen on it, but you're not exactly about to renege on a bet.

>



Well... this isn't so bad so far, it's actually kinda pleasant, you were kind of expecting it be a lot more rundown that thi...

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What the heck!!!

>


There uh, doesn't appear to be a handle here... how... how the heck does this even work????

>


Well this...blows. You're trapped in a spooky, shifty house, and your friends won't even consider calling for help until the morning. Yeah this really sucks, but you guess you shouldn't mope about it.

> See if there's any symbols you can see. Also, do you know the person in the painting?

>Seems the lights are on. Maybe your friends set up stuff to make the house extra spooky.

Go find a ghost, beat the ghost shit out of it for girly giggles.

>Don't panic. Maybe the reason no one ever leaves this place is because it's so awesomely, fantastically nice that no one ever wants to leave.

>Keep you chin up, stay positive.

>Seems the lights are on. Maybe your friends set up stuff to make the house extra spooky.



Maybe, you suppose that's not impossible... Yeah maybe your friends are just pranking you. definitely.

>Don't panic. Maybe the reason no one ever leaves this place is because it's so awesomely, fantastically nice that no one ever wants to leave.



Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight.

>In a casual, *nope, I'm not panicking for my safety* tone of speed and grace, try opening a ground floor window.



These windows appear to be completely fixed into the wall. They don't have any opening of anything.

>See if there's any symbols you can see.



What you mean on the door?? Yeah it's coated in spidery imagery.

>Also, do you know the person in the painting?



No. You don't exactly know very many spider... ant... bug-people. Let's go with bug people.
There's a plaque though, it say: The Lady Elovitra of Spydeir, 1892, "She was the only one I really liked." -Arachnia
Not exactly names you recognize. You don't think.


>Go find a ghost, beat the ghost shit out of it for girly giggles.



Heckie Yeah! You don't know if there are any ghosts actually in here, but If there are you're gonna punch em....Yeah!

>



Yeah!



There ain't no ghosts here...

>



As the clock strikes twelve, you hear something else beneath the clock chimes, a... voice, coming from that door.

>deny solicitors slash Jehovah's witnesses. You're on a roll here!

> Ooh, go and check it out like the stereotypical horror movie protagonist you are

> Woah look at that purple box over there? What's inside?

> what does the voice say?
> also look for weapons. makeshift weapons. like a book

>Don't suppose you've seen bug people before?

>Look through the keyhole.

>"I have that pizza you ordered."

or

>Panic! Panic and hide! Hide under the clock, hide under the table, pretend you're a lamp, MAYBE ALL THREE AT ONCE!

>Smash through the door, scare them first before they scare you.

>seconding bursting through the door

>Ask the spider on the chair who's behind the door

>Go knock on the door.

>Note the large spider to your left and the large knife to your right.
>Do the inhabitants of this place seem friendly?

>Ask the spider on the chair who's behind the door



Spider on the chaaaaaaaaa

>





>Grab the candelabra for defense!



You feel at least 19% safer than you were before now. The arachnid monsters will tremble at the sight of this lighting instrument.

>Woah look at that purple box over there? What's inside?



It's... LOCKED, darnit, this majestic looking box is just taunting you with with the mysteries of what treasures it obviously contains.

>



You stow it within the myterious confines of your personage. Don't question it.

>Cautiously eavesdrop.



It kinda sounds like a... radio show??

...allow me to thank you all for tuning in once again, my dear friends, to the midnight show, with me, your dashing host, Arachnia, once again bringing to you the latest in devilish rumor-mongering, and life advice...

>Smash through the door, scare them first before they scare you.



...let's begin the show with something light, a personal story, about me. Earlier this week I had a visitor, a dapper young man wearing a smart suit mmmmyes, I know what you're thinking, "Aren't you a little old to be soliciting handsome young men." hohoho, I admit your right, but I'm weak...

>



The radio show appears to originate up the hall a bit.

...Anyway, we had a little chat the young man and I, and things we're getting saucy you know, hoho, but alas, it wasn't meant to be, you see, because the young man informed me of his business here...

> listen to the radio. and hide somewhere in the hallway.

Go say hi to chairspider!!! They seem sad

>run down the hall and scream like a banshee, give dating advice while also screaming

>Shake the plant, there could be treasures untold amongst its wee leaves.

or

>Wait. You've heard this radio show before. You don't think it's very good.

>Shake the plant, there could be treasures untold amongst its wee leaves.

>Plant leaves: Actually be millions of spiders.

Contemplate your MAGNIFICENT eyebrows.
Like goddamn but they're nice

Also be wary of the voice

Find the source of the radio broadcast.

And then turn it off, all that noise is giving you a headache.